Perez Hilton: Hey Britney….

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Hey Britney….

Filed under: Britney Spears

We hear you are looking for a new assistant.

How does Perez apply for the job????

Seriously! We could help you out. Big time!

Posted: July 26, 2007 at 7:49 pm

244 comments to “Hey Britney….”

More comments: [1] 2 3 »

jeena says – reply to this

1

that is unbe-WEAVE-able!
Emma says – reply to this

2

Oh that would be cool:)
mc says – reply to this

3

first
steph says – reply to this

4

No, Perez! I want the job! I can show her how to be a Mom, and then take care of her shit for her!
hurricane says – reply to this

5

You would get THE BEST dirt ever. Apply! Apply! Apply!
whatalotofbunk says – reply to this

6

*snicker!* Go for it, P!
Emily says – reply to this

7

Yes, PLEASE hire Perez, he could really help you!!!
deborah says – reply to this

8

actually, not a bad idea
Perez Lover says – reply to this

9

Perez would be the most qualified for this one…oh yeah…11111111ssssssssssstttttttttttttt
eve says – reply to this

10

that will be great!

www.myspace.com/evelyng
Rini says – reply to this

11

Perez, you were in my dream last night. Please, don't apply to work with Brittney.
cyrus says – reply to this

12

i'm up for it
poppy says – reply to this

13

… preferably one who can SPELL, you fuckwit.
deborah says – reply to this

14

actually not a bad idea
elijah says – reply to this

15

you have to like some one to be there asistant shes not that dumb
reddlight977 says – reply to this

16

Brit! I could totally do that job. Hire me Brit!
Josy says – reply to this

17

She started off with Felicia, and ended up with this Funk skank, so it's a downward trend. Hmmm…let's see. Is it possible that you can be an even trashier enabler than Shannon Funk is?
Mindy says – reply to this

18

it would be the best thing she ever did!!!!
j says – reply to this

19

DO IT PEREZ! THAT WOULD BE SOOOOOO AWESOME! SERIOUSLY. DO IT. Having a big pink/orange oompa loompa take care of her would be a step up from what she looks/behaves like right now.
me says – reply to this

20

toni t wants the job
leah says – reply to this

21

fourth!
La Danseuse says – reply to this

22

Quite sure Perezzers cud do it with one eye closed. GUYS SHIA LABEOUF HAS A GIRLFRIEND—HER NAME'S VAYA (UGLY ASS NAME), SHE'S PUERTO RICAN, AND SHE'S A "MODEL-MUSICIAN."
me says – reply to this

23

toni t - hire her
Rini says – reply to this

24

And, I'm lame, because I spelled Britney wrong.
PIck Perez says – reply to this

25

Perez would be great for the job. I mean you do both have a thing for pink hair!!!
tt says – reply to this

26

hire toni tan
Kane St Kane says – reply to this

27

Her dog leaves a shit stain on a designer dress at an OK photoshoot and now she's looking for a new Ashitstant……

Britney is tres chic!
Betty Childs says – reply to this

28

Sheeeet! I'll take that job and turn her life upside down, which would really be rightside up.
Zach Yeager (NuVasive) says – reply to this

29

this is fucking lame bro. i would totally be britney's assistant!!! yeey!!!!!
Kate says – reply to this

30

That would be so awesome and a smart move on her part!!
Jessica says – reply to this

31

Don't waste your time Perez. You can do so much better!
Annetta says – reply to this

32

Anyone would love to work for Britney, big bucks!
Whoreanus says – reply to this

33

Stay on long enough to get some good gossip!!!!
liz says – reply to this

34

she'll fire you for looking better than her nxt to her
ashley says – reply to this

35

i just heard on the radio that her little sister jamie lynn.. might be pregnant?!?
anyone know if this is true… PEREZ?
sfsfohsfop says – reply to this

36

you spelled assistant wrong you dumb fuck.
leave britney alone
reality-check says – reply to this

37

Shitneys booring. She was cool as a whorish catholic school girl but shes all wacky cracky now. Who would want that after fedx was up in it? Talk about gross. No wonder her kids are mildly retarded. At least they can all carpool and take the short bus to school with Nicoles kid bcuz you KNOW thats going to be one fooked up kid. Unless of course the surgeon genreral now thinks heroin , crack, coke and smokes is the new baby diet.
reality-check says – reply to this

38

*general
Julie Lang says – reply to this

39

Yes! Perez sure knows about PR, if I was a celebrity I'd snatch him up.
Perez can be loyal when he wants to, its only a matter of being on his good sie.
k-fed says – reply to this

40

I sent my resume I needa job .. i hear that she offers drug benefits to her employees sweet !
Muffy says – reply to this

41

Brittany, you need ME to be your @ssistant! Call me thru Perez. Muffy
Britney's Old Assistant says – reply to this

42

If anybody can put up with that crazy bitch and make a positive impact on her career it's you, Perez!

Sometimes, at night, she made me brush her weave while it was still in her hair. It was so gross! I swear she has chocolate in it! And she would always make me go take care of the kids when they were crying or something, she never wanted to do it herself!

Good riddance!
spankyspooky says – reply to this

43

lol
Britney should hire Perez says – reply to this

44

Perez was once a faithful fan of Britney and he still likes her. He just wants to get attention from her.
ana says – reply to this

45

I want to be your assistant too! And I have experience…
Muffy says – reply to this

46

Brit Brit…what up…I'll be yours, no charge…

Watch out Papzz!! Muffy's going to F you up!
precious says – reply to this

47

Perez, be careful what you wish for, honey. She'll make you walk around in head scarves and twinkie dresses. She'll stuff your big ass into a size 10 that you cannot breathe in, and drip weave grease and glue all over your pretty, precious ass. None of us want that, baby.
Monkeycox says – reply to this

48

Best idea ever, Perez! Wear a mic!
gada peel says – reply to this

49

PEREZ FTW!
Victoria NYC says – reply to this

50

Brittney do a anna & be done with yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ana says – reply to this

51

Britneys old assistant tell me how to get a hold of her or send her my email:

hotauntieana@hotmail.com
Day says – reply to this

52

My friends & I were JUST talking about this last night! We live not to far away from Malibu & were saying how she should hang out with some REAL people….not the trashy/slutty/enablers that she hangs out with now! I just feel so bad for her!! I hope for her (and those babies) sakes she's pulls her self together!!
infamous E Roberto says – reply to this

53

Perez, you wouldn't last a day!
Rach says – reply to this

54

YEAH, Perez!! - That would be cool! You have the magic touch and could help turn her around!! Plus, she's gotta respect ya, so it'd be more of a mutual kinda thing… I mean, SomeOnes gotta teach the gal that one can strike a balance! Might as well be PEREZ! You ROCK! X O X O
titi says – reply to this

55

EXCLUSIVE PICTURES OF BRITNEY “OK” photoshoot here
h t t p : / / vipix.squarespace.com/
the source for great exclusive pics
vipix.squarespace.com
EXCLUSIVE PICTURES OF BRITNEY “OK” photoshoot here
h t t p : / / vipix.squarespace.com/
the source for great exclusive pics
vipix.squarespace.com
EXCLUSIVE PICTURES OF BRITNEY “OK” photoshoot here
h t t p : / / vipix.squarespace.com/
the source for great exclusive pics
vipix.squarespace.com
mark-EE says – reply to this

56

Oh P, you so craaaay-zEE
kt says – reply to this

57

um, you spelled assistant wrong….
Frankie says – reply to this

58

Perez, you'd be fucking AWESOME as Britney's assistant. Be a mommy during the day, then fill us in with all her dirt!
miss k says – reply to this

59

i think you would be perfect!! you should totally apply!!
papa bear says – reply to this

60

My vote is for the douche who keeps posting his/her personal phone number on one of the most visited non-search sites on the internet. Bravo dumbfuck.

www.sithomeandrot.com
pt says – reply to this

61

www.hollywoodheathens.com

It has the gossip on paris that PEREZ WONT POST.

www.hollywoodheathens.com
Kristian says – reply to this

62

I would like to apply for the assistant job. Where can I send my CV?
Thanks!
cmb21 says – reply to this

63

damn, I'll apply!!!!!!!
Margarita says – reply to this

64

Dude.
You spelled assistant wrong on your application.
Don't call her, she'll call you. lol
nina says – reply to this

65

leave brit alone! shes havin a hard time… i shud b her p.a cuz she needs support not more slagging off!!!
Legna says – reply to this

66

Perez, go for it!

I'm sure you can show her how to behave like a proper young woman! Just like your mama showed you.
lan says – reply to this

67

perez i love you and i think you need your own show on bravo, i figure if that redheaded lady gets one you should too

you as britney spears' assistant would be the best episode ever
Jennifer says – reply to this

68

Hey, I'd do it. Couldn't be that hard.
roscoe12 says – reply to this

69

Why Ann Coulter ADs???? Perez, I can't believe you'd accept money from that homophobe!
TRY SPELLCHECK A-HOLE! says – reply to this

70

It's ASSISTANT not assitant…you dumb fuck!
Sara says – reply to this

71

If you're going to make money off a website and be profiled on news shows, at least learn to spell and use proper grammar, thanks.
Wanted says – reply to this

72

She needs an assistant, P. Not an ASS-istant.
Britney's new song sucks says – reply to this

73

I so want to help this girl too…ugh! She needs someone who will lay down the law! Britney…you need someone that doesn't fall for the hollywood trappings!

Britney's new song–is on that "other" website…it sounds like she made it in a third rate studio setting…or in her own personal studio with a keyboard…eek!
I really hope she is joking with this one, and the actual song is better than that!
Skip that rock ... says – reply to this

74

Brit you are absolutely brilliant and I think the joke is on all the fools that take smack about you … yet cash the checks they get paid for doing it. You will rise above and be … they will fall on their ass. I believe!

dear-britany-spears.com
Jessica says – reply to this

75

Should start by learning to spell…. ASSISTANT
pinkshop says – reply to this

76

Help this girl out! She just took her kids! She needs Perez's help!!
Britney Fans Are pathetic says – reply to this

77

Hey teenyboppers if you don't like this site and Perez then don't visit it you dumb cunts.
Britney is a fat whore I can't wait to see this ugly worthless skank die.
CS says – reply to this

78

Actually, to be a good assistant, one must first spell the title correctly. Not a bad idea though. Anything new would be better than everything going on right now!
Crystal Baller says – reply to this

79

Hopefully, whatever new assistant you get will know how to spell assistant.
dsfsf says – reply to this

80

Vaya isn't an ugly name. It's beautiful. I bet you think Christina or something plain like that is pretty.
Brand-a-too-ee says – reply to this

81

BRITNEY DONT LISTEN TO PEREZ…. SWEETY i WILL BE YOUR ASSISTANT!!
ingrid says – reply to this

82

what's an assitant?
julie says – reply to this

83

hey britney - if there's anything I can offer to contribute to restoring peace and serenity in your life I am happy to do so. not looking for compensation or .infamy..just reaching out as an act of kindness to someone who could quite possibly welcome assistance without expectation…wishing you the best.
bri says – reply to this

84

Your style sucks, you'd spend all day ranting about other celebs, who would want you as a personal assistant?
JACQUELINE says – reply to this

85

PEREZ FIND OUT HOW TO GET THIS JOB….AND PLEASZE HELP THIS GIRL ,SHE NEEDS ALL THE HELP SHE CAN GET ..IF YOU CAN HELP HER THAN MAYBE THERE HOPE FOR LOHAN AND THE REST OF THEM . LOL

P.S- LOVE YAH AND YOU WEBSITE
I HATE TEENYBOPPER CUNTS! says – reply to this

86

hey teenyboppers, non of you can spell for shit, and you're idol can't spell either you hypocrites.
Kristie says – reply to this

87

I hear one of Lindsay Lohan's former assistants is looking for a job!
kaileigh says – reply to this

88

NOW WE CAN JUST SIT AROUND AND WAIT FOR SHANNON FUNK TO CONTACT THE TABLOIDS TO MAKE SOME MONEY OFF OF HER CRAZY BRITNEY STORIES.
JEK says – reply to this

89

amen to that!!!
Hahaha says – reply to this

90

Do it! Do it!
alyse says – reply to this

91

Can someone explain to me what this "first" thing is about with some of your commenter s?
sezer says – reply to this

92

I WANT THEE JOBBB=)
sstaciee says – reply to this

93

I WANT THE JOBB ASSESS=)
Lido says – reply to this

94

Woah number 51 you crossed the line you heartless bitch
Jason says – reply to this

95

That would be HYSTERICAL!!! omg I can just picture it now!!
Lido says – reply to this

96

People write "first" when they think that they are going to be the very first commenter (#1) Sometimes it doesnt work out and ppl beat them to it
Josy says – reply to this

97

Prerequisite for being a Britney fan: RETARDATION.
DANIELLE says – reply to this

98

yea, seriously. help give that girl some CLASS.
stay fabulous!
MOI* says – reply to this

99

I am starting this campaign right here, right now.
PEREZ FOR BRIT'S NEW ASSISTANT . . . LET'S MAKE IT HAPPEN!
I LOVE YOU PEREZ!
alyse says – reply to this

100

Thanks lido…

More comments: [1] 2 3 »