Totally Tragic

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Poor Shannon Elizabeth. Our cold heart almost breaks for her.

The American Pie alum's "career" as an actress has been suffering lately, but bitch has been working the poker circuit.

F List is traveling the world, showing up at "celebrity" poker tournaments and hoping the cards turn up in her favor.

Shannon is currently in Australia, where she threw a diva fit at a tournament in Melbourne.

Honey, F Listers can't be demanding!

P.S. She lost.

Poor Shannon sucks at poker too!

P.P.S. OMG! OMG! Wouldn't it be hot if Elizabeth did a Lifetime TV movie with Jennifer Love Desperate??? Geniusity, we say.

[Image via Mavrix Online.]

    Posted: Aug 1, 2007 at 10:02 pm / Email this  »

    99 comments to “Totally Tragic”

    1. deana says – reply to this


      1

      ewww

    2. diana says – reply to this


      2

      she ugly

    3. dani says – reply to this


      3

      FIRST

    4. deana says – reply to this


      4

      first by the way

    5. DANi says – reply to this


      5

      told yall i was first

    6. Nadia says – reply to this


      6

      AHAHA I remember her!!!!

    7. Lauren says – reply to this


      7

      Sad

    8. tracy says – reply to this


      8

      and she is? umm no one

    9. Lala says – reply to this


      9

      dork

    10. Sydney says – reply to this


      10

      Isn't Jenn working on Ghost Whisperer? You're too funny Perez.

    11. Jennifer says – reply to this


      11

      That would be a great movie! LMAO

    12. courtneyc says – reply to this


      12

      hahahaha thats soo sadddd but shes so pretty

    13. steph says – reply to this


      13

      :(

    14. Lizzie says – reply to this


      14

      First

    15. valentina says – reply to this


      15

      so sad shes lower then kathy griffin

    16. Yeah says – reply to this


      16

      Bitch

    17. angela says – reply to this


      17

      first

    18. YourMom says – reply to this


      18

      Sad that she even thinks of herself as a celebrity. Remember when she was married to that fat fug guy?

    19. bonnie says – reply to this


      19

      hahaha.
      i was just talking about her today too.

    20. marble grapes says – reply to this


      20

      Hey Perez, you are like Hedda Hopper, only gay and Latino. Thats totally hot!

    21. BadActressAward says – reply to this


      21

      she's a phone call away from Surreal Life

    22. does it matter? says – reply to this


      22

      Sad, you have no clue what you are talking about. I don't know anything about the 'meltdown', but that tells me two things - you don't know anything about her, and you know nothing about poker. Shannon is actually a GREAT player and whatever her acting career may or may not bring, her poker career is in full upswing. Learn a little before you bash on an industry you know NOTHING about.

    23. marley says – reply to this


      23

      don't forget, you know you made the F list when you are on those lame ass "Consolidated Resorts" radio commercials. I heard her the other day promoting that scam, she cant even read the script right! Dumb Ass!

    24. joe says – reply to this


      24

      She's totally banging, I'd tap that anytime!!

    25. Trisha says – reply to this


      25

      truely pathetic

    26. meltz911 says – reply to this


      26

      I've been in a few touraments with Shannon and this is what I've seen….
      She started out trying to be the pretty, clueless type, "oh my god, I won!" But everyone could tell she could play so the act didn't last long. Then she tried the "I've done this too many times to not be taken seriously" thing. Which resulted in poker players taking her seriously for about 2 seconds. Then the DIVA shit started.
      Bitch can't PLAY. Period.
      She is screwing a respected player on the circut so not many will bad mouth her in public out of respect for the guy but her shit is tired and people are starting to diss her , finally.

    27. WTF says – reply to this


      27

      It must suck to be a beautiful women, traveling the world getting played to play Poker!

      How sad for her!

    28. slyplay says – reply to this


      28

      I'm not first bitches

    29. coco says – reply to this


      29

      I'm sick of this new background, and besides, the hottest new gossip hotspot is www.hollywoodheathens.com
       
      www.hollywoodheathens.com
       
      www.hollywoodheathens.com

    30. TRACy says – reply to this


      30

      hey DOES ANYONE THING SHE LOOKS LIKE ALYSSA HOT MILANO, IF YOU LOOK REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY QUICK ?
      DO YA THINK?

    31. Just wondering. says – reply to this


      31

      Does she even have a career any more? Seriously.

    32. does it matter? says – reply to this


      32

      meltz? Played with her in a few tournaments - which ones - the NBC heads up where she finished 4th, or the WSOP main event? Or was it the nothing nowhere when she first started…

      I'm curious.

      Gotta have some play to finish 4th in one of the best fields in the world… but you'd know that - you're a player.

    33. QueenDean says – reply to this


      33

      Who is she? I don't remember her. Did she play on a sitcom or something?

    34. Why is first so important?? says – reply to this


      34

      I'm new at all this shit, but why is "first" so important? Go easy on me people, I'm just asking a simple question…. Thanks, all in good fun…

    35. pm says – reply to this


      35

      she looks great - and with hardly any makeup!

    36. lene says – reply to this


      36

      Shannon is doing great.

      & So is Jennifer Love HEWITT! She actually has a show..What do you have PEREZ? a gossip site?!?! LOL

    37. meltz911 says – reply to this


      37

      You have given yourself away! Nice try though. Your not much better on the table either. LOL See you next week, if you show.

    38. does it matter? says – reply to this


      38

      Nope, wrong - I don't know her, never met her, never played poker with her, nothing - I just don't think you're much of all that either - at least represent the pair of fours that you are.

      I just have respect for poker, and a little for what she's doing to expand the sport. She gets press, and then Jerks try to tear it down. I like Perez, I like reading Perez, but he's bashing stuff he knows nothing about.

    39. BUSTED!! says – reply to this


      39

      i had a feeling it might be her…good call, meltz! Now piss off and die, bitch…be thankful that Perez even noticed you.

    40. ED says – reply to this


      40

      ummm…who cares?

    41. meltz911 says – reply to this


      41

      Like I said, not much at the table, and if you knew anything about poker you would realize that celebs are a great marketing gimmik but thats about it. The only one worth a damn is Norm MacDonald, he may not be a great actor but hes a hell of a poker player (came in #80, i think, can't remember cause I was busted out on day2 and was involved in a greenroom game ) out of almost 6350 people. Thats great play, comming in 4th out of a bunch of celebs (and pros only there to promot the game) is BS. She has NO play, fanboy.

    42. F List says – reply to this


      42

      Her 'acting' career consisted of taking her shirt off in American Pie.

      All downhill from there, baby

    43. yomama says – reply to this


      43

      read the article… it's funny when they say happy snaps

    44. Amy says – reply to this


      44

      Hey..!
      It was actually Melbourne Perez, not Sydney. Anyway I saw her that night, she was hardly taking "happy snaps". She was pretty diva-tistic considering she's not that big of a celeb!

    45. Jessica says – reply to this


      45

      Hey, be nice! She's hot and has a sweet personality. It's all good.

    46. Joe says – reply to this


      46

      I've watched her play. She cleans up at the tables against other celebs. She maybe F list. But she gets an A out of taking Matt Damon's Bourne money away from him year after year.

    47. Tom Thumb says – reply to this


      47

      I'm small

    48. Tom says – reply to this


      48

      www.myspace.com/atomiccalabasas you know where to reach me

    49. IHateLindsay says – reply to this


      49

      I would totally do her. And when I'm through with that slut, there'd be NO diva attitude from her. Only YES SIR and NO SIR and DO ME IN THE BUTT AGAIN PLEASE SIR.

      She's a ho, and needs to be treated like the filthy ho she is!

    50. LU says – reply to this


      50

      I'LL TAKE THE NAUGHTIEST TUNGUE LASHING ON MY TAINT FROM LINDSAY LOHAN!!!!

    51. shitaztic says – reply to this


      51

      Damn even fucked up the ass Tara Reid is doing better than her.
      Poker…hun!?!????!?

      HAHAHAHAHAHA…

    52. smorf says – reply to this


      52

      She may move up to D list if they make another American Pie film

    53. JET says – reply to this


      53

      WTF, I'm going blind.
      .
      I can't see on the screen what I'm typing.
      .
      OMG, maybe I'm having a stroke.
      .
      Wait a minute, it's just that DAMN "The Fashionista Diaries" Red & Black background causing my blindness.
      .
      IDIOTS, now that they have blinded us, how do they expect us to WATCH their show Wednesday nights ???

    54. ghost says – reply to this


      54

      Please STOP! The i'm first comment has all the clout of a piece of dog crap! Who is the ten year-old idiot that does this? Please stop this you stupid piece of garbage.

    55. michelle says – reply to this


      55

      If they did a Lifetime movie together, it should be about a once popular actress who turns to the dark side of gambling. It could be a bioepic a la Rounders. A tragedy of sorts that resounds "Gambling is a drug, too!"

    56. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      56

      Like her or not, she can't be that bad at poker cuz the way i found out that she was even doing this was when i heard a news story on MSNBC about one of the tournaments and i thought it was the very first one but either way, SHE WON AND I WANNA KNOW WHY THE HELL IS THIS IS NOT IN THIS STORY???????????????? As if someone would'nt call PEZ on that one????? You shoulda at least given he credit for that . BUT NOOOOOOOOOO.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS SOUNDS WAY, WAY LIKE IT WAS WRITTEN BY A GAY MAN WHO HATES STRAIGHT CHICK'S. ESPECIALLY THE GOOD LOOKING ONE'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    57. JoMama says – reply to this


      57

      Still pretty, but needs to touch up those roots.

    58. Dulce says – reply to this


      58

      Geez Perez!! I thought she was dead or something!

    59. meltz911 says – reply to this


      59

      She didn't win dumbass, she came in 4th

    60. katie says – reply to this


      60

      perez your a fat gay man, who's job is to talk shit about other people. you really need to tone down on the name-calling. Simply put, people who live in glass houses should not throw stones. Just saying.

      And shannon looks beautiful, even if she is a diva bitch.

    61. cfc says – reply to this


      61

      PEREZ IS GOING ON CELEBRITY FIT CLUB!!!!

    62. Sarah says – reply to this


      62

      I AM SUFFERING FROM PEREZ UPDATE WITHDRAWALS! updattteeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    63. AJofAZ says – reply to this


      63

      Perez keeping dishing on the Celebs!! Pay no attention to them crazy bitch haters who leave comments trying to diss you…your FABOLOUS!! Okay now answer me this………Why did CHelsea get the show on E! ???

    64. AIMZ says – reply to this


      64

      ewww she ain't as hot as she used to be.

    65. kxzq-tv69 los angeles, ca (ind.) says – reply to this


      65

      OMFG, I didn't like her when I saw her and her THEN-hubby on an episode of 'While You Were Out' (TLC). I could just *tell*this bimbo has no use in the entertainment industry, other than hardcore porn. And I could just *tell* she and this sad sack of shit she had a quickie marriage to, wouldn't last in the long run. And lo and behold, I was right!!! HA-HA! What a LOSER, Shannon whatsyourname. :-p~@

    66. mikey says – reply to this


      66

      Don't feel too bad for her, Perez. Remember all the time you wasted with the pause/step forward button on your DVD player during her American Pie strip tease?

      Oh wait, you're gay.

      I'd rather see her and Elizabeth Berkley in a movie together, if you know what I mean.

    67. Kathryn says – reply to this


      67

      YOU'RE SUCH A DORK!!!!!!!!!!!!

      WHAT IS "TRAGIC" ABOUT THAT??? SO GAAAAYY AND MELODRAMATIC!

      SHE'S SMILING WHILE SHE'S AT A POKER TOURNAMENT!!! MAYBE SHE'S *** HAVING FUN**** .

      WHY THE HELL DO YOU READ SO MUCH INTO THIS SHIT??

      DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO BE IN SOME BLOCKBUSTER **RIGHT NOW** OR ELSE THEY'RE TRAGIC???

      SHIT! IT JUST LOOKS PLAIN FUN TO ME!!!!

      WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?????

    68. F lister says – reply to this


      68

      I would totally F her!

    69. Jacob Kasza says – reply to this


      69

      ~ha-ha~ Says Kathryn (#75.), who probably gladly PAID for Cuba Gooding, Jr. movie, 'Boat Trip'. *snickers* ;-)

    70. kitty says – reply to this


      70

      barf.

    71. leah says – reply to this


      71

      EXCUSE ME, PEREZ, BUT IF SHE IS THE F-LIST, WHAT DOES THAT MAKE YOU? THE Z-LIST? BECAUSE YOU ARE, IN FACT, A FAILED ACTOR, WHO COULDN'T GET ANY WORK AT ALL, EXCEPT FOR 1 LINE IN AN EPISODE OF CSI, WAS IT? THAT'S WHEN YOU DECIDED TO START TALLKING SHIT ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE, EXCEPT FOR ASS-KISSING SOME MEDIA WHORES, LIKE PARIS HILTON. STRANGE HOW YOU ARE SO NICE TO THAT SLUT, WHAT CRUMBS DOES SHE THROW YOU FOR THAT? AND BTW, I SAW YOUR GETUP TO MAKE FUN OF BRITNEY IN THAT PINK WIG AND YOUR UNDERWEAR, YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN ARRESTED FOR PUBLIC INDECENCY, IT WAS VOMIT INDUCING TO SEE SO MUCH OF YOUR FAT SLOB BODY, OR AS YOU WOULD SAY, YOU LOOKED SHITEOUS! THE AUDACITY YOU HAVE TO CALL JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT "DESPEARATE", NO, I'M NOT A FAN OF HERS, BUT AT LEAST SINCE SHE HAS LITTLE TALENT SHE KEEPS HER APPEARANCE IN SHAPE, WHIICH IS MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR YOU!

    72. 9 inches of pain says – reply to this


      72

      I like to crack on most of these skeevy ho's. However I sat just a few inches from Shannon Elizabeth in Vegas a few weeks ago. The friggin chick just OOZES SEXUALITY. God you just want to stick it in her bad place.

    73. TJ says – reply to this


      73

      I don't think Jennifer Love Hewitt is desperate.

    74. Jasher says – reply to this


      74

      Shannon Elizabeth is the F-listiest of them all! Poker? Yeah, poker in the rear if you know what I mean!

    75. Rash Manly says – reply to this


      75

      "Would you like some cheeze with that, Winehouse?"
      .
      Rash Manly therashreport.com

    76. maggie says – reply to this


      76

      perez i love you but that happened last year! xx

    77. Lord Snooty says – reply to this


      77

      Who can get laid by cute guys the most… Perez or Shannon…. mmmm…. this is a brainteaser….. I give up !

    78. Coldevort says – reply to this


      78

      OH SHUT UP PEREZ!! She's a total hottie!! She's also a DECENT poker player. You probably suck shit! I love her!

    79. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      79

      LIKE HELL JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT'S NOT DESPERATE!!!!! SHE GOT PUNKED ONE TIME A FEW YEARS AGO AND THEY CALLED HER IN FOR AN "INTERVIEW". SO SHE SHOWS UP WITH NO AGENT IN SIGHT, ANYWHERE AND SHE'S THERE WITH ONE SINGLE "MOVIE EXECUTIVE", ONE NOW AND NO AGENT WITH HER TO SUCK UP TO THE SUPPOSED MOVIE EXEC SO HE CAN TRY WITH ALL HIS MIGHT TO HELP HER GET THIS BIG ROLE AND UP HER STATUS BIG-TIME SO HE CAN GET HIS CHUNK OF CHANGE AND A WHOLE LOT MORE IF SHE HITS IT BIG! I DON'T KNOW BUT I'M PRETTY DAMN SURE THAT WHEN YOU GET CALLED IN FOR A SHOT AT A MOVIE ROLE THAT THERE WILL BE MORE MOVIE EXECS THERE THAN ONE WHICH SHOULD HAVE BEEN A DEAD-GIVEAWAY RIGHT THERE, CUZ MOST PEOPLE WOULD HAVE KNOWN SOMETHING WAS UP ON THAT ALONE. BUT NOT HER!!!!! SO SHE'S TAKING THIS ALL SERIOUSLY, TRYING TO BE ALL SWEET AND SUCK-UP TO THIS GUY WHEN HE TELLS HER THAT I'TS FOR A BRAD PITT MOVIE AND SHE'S ABOUT TO FAINT THINKING THAT THEY REALLY WANT HER FOR A MOVIE STARRING BRAD PITT. I MEAN YOU JUST KNEW THAT SHE WAS FREAKING OUT THINKING THAT SHE WAS FINALLY GONNA GO FROM ABOUT, MAYBE THE C-LIST AND WAS ACTUALLY THINKING THAT SHE WAS GONNA MAKE IT TO THE A-LIST AND BE THE NEXT JULIA ROBERTS OR SOMETHING. NOW YOU KNOW ALL THE WHILE THAT SHE WANTS TO GO SCREAMING AND HOLLERING TO THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD THAT SHE'S IN THE RUNNING FOR A LEADING LADY ROLE WITH BRAD PITT AS HER LEADING MAN AND MAYBE SHE MIGHT ACTUALLY GET THE PART, RIGHT. SO THEY LET HER SIT THERE FOR A FEW MINUTES WHILE SHE'S THERE WETTING HER PANTS THINKING SHE'S GONNA GET THIS BIG ROLE CUZ THE GUY HAS JUST TOLD HER THAT SHE'S FIRST CHOICE FOR THE PART. THEN ASHTON KUTCHER WALKS IN THE DOOR AND SHE INSTANTLY REALIZES THAT SHE JUST GOT ROYALLY, MAJORLY, BIG-TIME PUNKED, AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY!!!!! SO SHE GIVES ASHTON THE CUSTOMARY HUG AND ALL GIGGLING LIKE MOST OF THE ONES THEY PUNK LIKE SHE'S NOT DEVASTATED CUZ THE MAJORITY OF THE ONES THEY GET THINK THEY MUST BE HOT SHIT IF THEY WHERE CHOSEN TO GET PUNKED IN THE FIRST PLACE LIKE THEY JUST WON AN ACADEMY AWARD OR SOMETHING. SO THEY WALK OUT OF THE ROOM WITH THE GIGGLING AND ALL WHEN SHE HAD THE NERVE TO SAY "SO NO BRAD PITT MOVIE" , STILL PRETENDING THAT IT WAS ALL FUNNY WHEN YOU JUST KNEW SHE WAS SHATTERED AND DEVASTATED THAT THE WHOLE THING WAS BOGUS AND WANTED TO GO CRY HER EYES OUT BEFORE SHE JUMPED OFF OF A TALL BUILDING CUZ SHE'D JUST FOUND OUT THAT THIS WAS THE CLOSEST SHE'D EVER GET TO GETTING A LEAD ROLE IN A BRAD PITT MOVIE. IT WAS THE WORST PUNK I'VE EVER SEEN!!!!! NEEDLESS TO SAY I'M SURE SHE DID NOT ENJOY GETTING PUNKED AT ALL. BACK TO THE C-LIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    80. Victoria NYC says – reply to this


      80

      NO SERIOUSLY…WHO IS SHE AGAIN??

    81. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      81

      87, I just heard about her winning one about two weeks ago. So if New Years Day was three weeks ago you might be right. But I sure thought it was on January 1st. Did they go and change it on me or something cuz if they did I missed out!!!!!

    82. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      82

      She was the "Hot Girl" in Scary Movie!!! She got her head chopped off by the killer and was still talking when he dumped her head in the lost and found bin at school. If anyone even says the name Carmen Electra i'll BARF.

    83. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      83

      I just realized that i responded to a comment posted as Victoria NYC. If i had known that you were a fan of hers i would'nt have helped you out like that!!!

    84. blondeskinnyjanie says – reply to this


      84

      #83 IS A HORRIBLE PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    85. Tonya says – reply to this


      85

      Jennifer Love is not desperate. She has a hit show and solid endorsements. Shannon Elizabeth never was, can't even qualify as a has-been. She does have a great publicist, though, that bitch is in mags every week.

    86. kemper boyd says – reply to this


      86

      fat boy, why the need to rip this girl? What's wrong with you? She's never done anything to you, seems like a nice enough person and she's just trying to get work, just like everybody else. You're a move or two away from the gutter yourself, try and act a little nicer and if you really need to insult people to make yourself better, than grow some balls and go after people who are really hurting society, i.e. politicans, corrupt CEO's,etc. Seriously…

    87. POKER IS LAME says – reply to this


      87

      i'm not sure when poker got popular but it did and i don't know why…
      superlame!

    88. Jennifer Farley says – reply to this


      88

      I think she's gorgeous and the only way to improve one's game is to play with superior talent. I think it's great she has a fairly unconventional hobby and I wouldn't bet against her on the acting talent gig, either. A cunning casting director and a great script and a gambling director may all converge. Far stranger things have happened.

    89. Dave says – reply to this


      89

      Shannon seems really cool, she married a normal looking guy which means she's not superficial, she is hot(i never said i wasn't at least part superficial), she seems to b having a lot of fun. and two big ups to jennifer love as well! peace!

    90. Jakeo says – reply to this


      90

      She needs a good sex tape to revive her career!

    91. jimmyjazz says – reply to this


      91

      Who's Shannon Elizabeth? Tee hee

    92. John says – reply to this


      92

      "Our cold heart almost breaks for her" - Perez, you're fucking hysterical.

    93. doppelganger says – reply to this


      93

      PEREZ, I LIKE YOU AND ALL, BUT PLEASE LAY OFF OF JENNIFER LOVE. SHE'S ACTUALLY A VERY VERY GOOD ACTRESS (BETTER THAN JENNIFER LOPEZ). SHE EVEN HAS A NICE SINGING VOICE (THOUGH NOT GOOD SONGS). HER ONLY DOWNFALL IS THAT SHE DOESN'T HAVE GREAT HANDLERS LIKE A LOT OF MEDIOCRE CELEBRITIES OUT THERE.

      WHY IS IT THAT YOU CELEBRATE MEDIOCRITY AND YET PUT DOWN TRULY TALENTED PEOPLE?

    94. Sera says – reply to this


      94

      Aww, leave her alone. She's a nice gal.

    95. haleyscomet says – reply to this


      95

      I hate this bitch and her ugly hairy husband too. My older sister waited on them and said they were all drunk and loud, and did nothing but give her a hard time and sat there all night even when very body left and they were gave her no tip! fuckin assholes!They look dirty ass people to me

    96. Shannon Hater says – reply to this


      96

      Shannon is one of the worst people I have ever met. SHE IS FAKE. Lives on BOTOX. Eats ONE ZONE BAR a day for nutrition. Tried to hold her DOGS hostage during her divorce from Joe. She got to THE OPENING OF AN ENVELOPE is there is FREE shit there. She is known in Hollywood at the GIFT SUITE WHORE! We all just laugh at her.

    97. ChrisA says – reply to this


      97

      At the World Series of Poker this year, I got to watch Shannon play for a bit. She's mainly quiet and passive at the table. But as soon as she stands up she just beams with excitement how all of the guys want her picture and autograph. I'm a female player myself, and I sort of feel like she found a niche with poker players where she's the hottest, coolest chick in the room again. Sad. While she has had some great finishes (3rd in the NBC heads up Championship), when she looses, she plays horribly, like she can't recover from a bad beat. I also think that since she is a pretty celebrity that the pros flock to her and help her with her skills. But, she is just starting out and I think she still has a good bit to learn about poker. We'll have a better idea if she is a good player in a few years. If she sticks with it that long.

    98. Kat says – reply to this


      98

      IS PEREZ ON VACATION OR WHAT!!!!!!

      WHERE IS THE UPDATE?

    99. meltz911 says – reply to this


      99

      blondeskinnyjanie ,
      Your either shannon or an idiot.
      Same thing I guess.