Powerful Words
Filed under: Gay Gay Gay
This article ran in the Friday edition of the Hollywood Reporter.
"Merv Griffin was gay.
Why should that be so uncomfortable to read? Why is it so difficult to write? Why are we still so jittery even about raising the issue in purportedly liberal-minded Hollywood in 2007? We can refer to it casually in conversation, but the mainstream media somehow remains trapped in the Dark Ages when it comes to labeling a person as gay.
Maybe that helps explain why Griffin, who died of prostate cancer Sunday at 82, stayed in the closet throughout his life. Perhaps he figured it was preferable to remain the object of gossip rather than live openly as "one of them." But how tremendously sad it is that a man of Merv's renown, of his gregarious nature and social dexterity, would feel compelled to endure such a stealthy double life even as the gay community's clout, and its levels of acceptance and equality, rose steadily from the ashes of ignorance.
I'm not at all insinuating that Griffin had a responsibility to come out. That was up to him.
But what a powerful message Griffin might have sent had he squired his male companions around town rather than Eva Gabor, his longtime good friend and platonic public pal. Imagine the amount of good Merv could have done as a well-respected, hugely successful, beloved and uncloseted gay man in embodying a positive image."
Click here to read the rest of the article by Ray Richmond.
Like this is a surprise? But who really cares? RIP
hes gay?!?!?
You're Gay!
FIRST MOTHERFUCKERS!
was gay***
first
Sad he didn't feel comfortable living his life if this is true.
the world is so close minded they just cant know that such a powerful person in hollywood was gay its very very sad
Amazing introduction Perezito!!
FIRSTTTTT MOTHERFUCKERRRZZZZ!
third
And HOW, Peepee! I agree.
perez in 5 years after sucking ass to get media attention. people, there are better celeb blogs!!!! wwtdd.com, bestweekever.tv, thesuperficial.com
perez is gross
6TH!!
I think it is an issue because merv is not around to confirm or deny it, not that it is such a big deal to be gay. Let the man rest in peace for crying out loid.
So Perez.. your saying that it was Merv's CHOICE to come out… but all these other celebs you violently kick out of the closet… what about them??? YOU may be proud of your anal dexterity… but Merv didn't have to be? But Ricky Martin, Anderson Cooper, etc has to be??
Your a two faced rump romper. But I still love the site!
because being gay is a choice, a sin, and those who are live in shame. Maybe that is why he did not come out of the closet…
I WAS SECONDDDDD
WHAT A SPERM BURPER!!!!
in your mind that may have happened, but just because you think being out is such a great thing, there are more who think that it is not, and these same peole will not even acknoledge you, oe any other gay man. The world isn't as gay as you might like or think , and I'm sure Merv was very astute to it……much more than you
no shit sherlock
Sooooooo glad to hear that this man managed to live and die without the fag squad forcing him out of the closet!! Kudos Merv…u didn't let them get you!!!! Perez never had the chance to force you out of the closet!!! CONGRATS!!!!!!!!
What ever merv. You just ruined everything.
Gay Freak!
Don't you think it explains why he was SOOO close to Ryan Seacrest, I mean c'mon. I'm sure Ryan was one of his boy toys.
Those are powerful words in the article, and while I half-way agree with them, I also respect the fact that he chose to remain private about his romantic life however. Lots of straight people in the industry choose to do the same too you know, and I don't blame any of them for it! Jodie Foster has been living as a quieted lesbian for years as we all know, but who cares?? If she choses to keep that part of her life private, that's her bizz. She usually only pops up in the media when she's doing a promotional tour for a new movie coming out or something, and otherwise lives a quiet and private life with her partner and 2 kids. Big deal- good for her! And good for Merv Griffin too. It's not like they were constantly trying to be out in the open all the time and trying to get their pictures taken like all these young attention-grabbing whores of today, who then turn around and have the nerve to ASK for privacy when they do something naughty and get sent to rehab or jail. I think if you chose to live privately and want that respected, then it should be. (By all of us, as well as the media for the most part too) But if you seek attention on yourself all of the time, then you are fair game, and people are gonna crush you for it every time you screw up. Like I said… it's fine by me if Merv chose to remain private about his sexuality. It was his business.
I don't care if Merv was gay! I loved his showed that is all that mattered to me. RIP
i dont get why alll the hating with perez if you guys hate perez and because he is gay go to a different website wow u people r sad
OH and PS…. If Merv did mosey around town with twinkies on his arm he probably wouldn't have been such a well-respected, hugely successful, beloved "man", becasue he wouldn't be embodying a positive image to anybody but his fellow twinkies (like yourself)
I dont Judge though! What you do with your tooshie is your business.
Going to hell you pooper scooper
Being gay is only a big deal because gay people run around saying it all the time. No hetersexuals go around saying, I'm staight.
Gay, shmay…he's was an asshole either way
to #17 jen: your conception was a choice, a sin, and your parents should live in shame….and stick you in a closet and throw away the key.
Just because someone is gay does not mean they have to flaunt it wearing a gold lame' thong on a Gay Pride Parade float! He was first class in everything he did and felt that his personal life was his own. Maybe he just wanted to keep a part of himself out of the spotlight because he is simply a private man where that is concerned.
In a world where we have to see low class so-called stars like Britney, Lindsay, Paris, Wino, Wentz, etc etc……I welcome any man (or woman) who is as elegant and sophisticated as Griffin was!
Let this industry giant rest in peace…..
The day that being labeled gay, fat, or ugly as though these things are negative is the day we are truly a free people. Perez, you think it is OK to make public the person parts of a persons life.
Being gay does NOT define you..what you do with your life does!!! You wonder how come people make such a big deal about it? Perhaps it is due to people like yourself who is an admittedly homosexual man, who shoots his load at 'outting' others who do NOT think it is anyones business.
You are just a big ol' piece of shit and frankly, you were called out on the VIEW for it .. you attack the innocent children, you make it your life's work to make the pain of others a punchline, what you do in your bedroom is not what defines you, it is your ugliness towards others that will earn you a spot on God's shit list …
Oh brother… 8-/
The day that being labeled gay, fat, or ugly as though these things are negative is the day we are truly a free people. Perez, you think it is OK to make public the personAL parts of a persons life.
Being gay does NOT define you..what you do with your life does!!! You wonder how come people make such a big deal about it? Perhaps it is due to people like yourself who is an admittedly homosexual man, who shoots his load at 'outting' others who do NOT think it is anyones business.
You are just a big ol' piece of shit and frankly, you were called out on the VIEW for it .. you attack the innocent children, you make it your life's work to make the pain of others a punchline, what you do in your bedroom is not what defines you, it is your ugliness towards others that will earn you a spot on God's shit list …
The bottom line, he was ashamed. Perez, he doesn't owe you shit. And in the future,stop outing people, let them come out on their own!
Why is it that any question or statement is fair game for a celebrity, questions and statements about divorce, drug addiction, childhood abuse etc…, but people like Perez get slammed for making statements about a person's sexuality, something that isn't (or shouldn't) be shameful or bad. You can trot out the old excuses and cliches: "it's no one's business" "it can hurt your career", etc…, but these are just covers for cowards. I suspect that closeted gay people must think that being gay is shameful, otherwise they wouldn't try so hard to hide it. We live in a world among other people, and we have obligations beyond ourselves and our own gratifications and interests. The dramatic increase in gay rights over the past three decades is owed in large part to people, both ordinary and famous, coming out of the closet and living a truthful life.
Its his business and his alone. If he didn't want to come out the choice was his to make
IT IS UP TO THE INDIVIDUAL TO TAKE ON THE RESPONSIBILITY OF COMING OUT AND EXPRESSING THEIR SEXUALITY. STOP ACCUSING PPL OF BEING GAY JUST CAUSE YOU LIKE THE COCK.
I don't understand… Who is saying he's gay? And where did they get their sources from? Also why wait until now to report this "story" when he can no longer can confirm or deny it himself? I'm not believing the story of him being gay simple because there are to many questions to be answered. Like I was always told as a child…"Don't believe all that you hear or read, because 90 percent of it is untrue.
Perez, were you even old enough to fully appreciate this man back in his heydey? Your compassion towards the gay lifestyle and living freely amongst it is respectable, but, I am concerned that you are more focused on ones lifestyle than what the person truly represented. The gayness is private and should be kept that way if one so chooses. His life was probably full. Comming out of the closet, by your standards doesn't neccisatate ones completeness.
i never new he was gay, but then again i don't pay attention to that sort of thing. i
I DONT PARADE AROUND GOING "I'M STRAIGHT!" THEREFORE THERE IS NO REASON FOR ANYONE TO HAVE TO SAY THEY ARE GAY IF THEY DO NOT FEEL THE NEED TO.
Contrary to the tired, whining rhetoric that homosexuals like to spew at us, believing homosexuality to be a sin is NOT a matter of "ignorance". The gay community is it's own worst enemy. You preach tolerance but you call any view that differs from yours "ignorant" or "hateful". You're all hypocrites and the more you try to shove your agenda down our throats, the more we are going to fight against you. You're all a bunch of self-pitying, whining brats who want the whole word to agree to go along with your lifestyle choice so that you don't have to feel guilty or embarrassed about it. The only real "hate speech" is that which goes on inside of your own heads so stop projecting your self-loathing on everyone except the one who truly finds your choices revolting. That would be YOU.
Merv probably kept quiet about it because most people are ashamed of their sin and perversion. Homosexuality is the one offense against the Lord that people seem to take so much pride in. (Where are all the drug addict/rapist.child molester.theif parades?) It is a crime against humanity and nature to lie with a member of the same sex. I know a few gays who are kind people, but their love of their sin is reprehensible. I love this site, but I am sickened by the filthy advertising and the perversion-glorification. Assuming that he wasn't trying to stop his offensive lifestyle, Merv Griffin will be waiting at the gates of hell to greet all of those who commit sins and revel in them without repentence or remorse. There is a way to save yourselves from the sin of homosexuality. Talk to a local pastor and ask him how to get started in living a purer life. Jesus Christ's sacrifice has covered your sins if you wil repent and have faith in Him. I love all of you. Please stop hurting yourselves and those you sin with. Please seek help.
i ALWAYS thought he was gay!
Why do people have to exploit the deceased IMMEDIATELY after they pass? This guy makes me sick. Who CARES if he was gay? Why do these losers think if someone DOESN'T come out they did something wrong? Ever think that he just didn't want to have photographers staking him out all the time? Hmm? Oh no, it has to be because he was ashamed! IT'S CALLED PRIVACY AND NOW THAT HE CAN'T DEFEND HIMSELF THIS GUY HAS TO TRY TO MAKE A DIME OFF SOMETHING HE'S FABRICATING! GOD what a one track minded loser! He can fuck off.
If that's what he wanted then that's OK. People who want to stay in the closet should be allowed to be in the closet. The outing several gossip websites is doing might be responsible for destroying some peoples lives.
My g/fs and I decided we wanted to dance and have a ball and what better place to go then a gay bar! Anyway, we met this fella from LA that shared how relieved he was to be home where he could openly be gay. We asked why he played the straight card in LA and it turns out he was an aspiring Actor and apparently that doesn't go so well with the business. You would think that by now that wouldn't be an issue, especially in LA!
Seriously, if the man didn't want to keep his private life just that (i.e., private), why not just let it be? What, is it much bigger news because he liked men? BFD! He did awesome work during his career. Don't you think he'd rather THAT be his legacy, not what he did in his private life (which he obviously preferred to be private)? Besides, there are enough people who put it all out there (ahem, HM/SP/LL/BS/NR/Beckhams/etc).., get your kicks off of them & leave MG alone. (RIP)
What you need to take into consideration is that he grew up in a different generation. Even the currently middle-aged still had to face a lot of shit growing up - hell homosexuality was a mental disorder til 1973! That's gotta affect you on some level all your life. The point is you need to take a step back and let people come out when they are ready (if they ever are).
It would have killed his career if he would have lived his life as an openly gay man. That's why nearly no one at his age came out, then.
What I meant to type was:
"Seriously, if the man WANTED TO keep his private life…"
Guess my typing got ahead of me. My bad!
It's sad, but that's the Republican way.
To Angie. Wow! I've heard you people exist; I just never thought I'd actually see (read) one. Maybe your God discriminates, but mine doesn't. Besides, why would he hate the people he made? Shocking to read your email. Sad, really.
It was a good article, quite sympathetic to Merv, and Ray Richmond raised some great points. It's sad that Merv felt forced to live his life that way, but the reality of the times from which he came demanded it — a fact Ray acknowledged.
Who cares whose gay or not? People in this world make a big deal about sexual preferance, and it really should just be a private thing to each individual. I personally don't care if a person is gay. Can't we just leave each other's private life alone?????
DUDE PEREZ WHO THE HELL CARES???????? WHY DO U KEEP EMPHAZISING ON PEOPLE THAT ARE GAY??? YOU PEOPLE ARE NASTY HOMOS WHO NEED TO GO OFF INTO ANOTHER ISLAND WHERE NO ONE CAN SEE THE MONSTROSITIES YOU FAGS DO!!!!!!!!!!! SICKOS! NOBODY CARES FOR YOU GUYS!!!!
Just don't get our fascination with sex pref. The only time I'm really interested in that is if I'm planning to have sex with someone myself! (And I KNOW I read the article, but I'm in Australia and never watched Merv Griffin and didn't know he was dead.)
Perez, I love you to death but ….. Merv was an old school business man. I have know many professional men (and women) who are gay and do not have any regard for the present state of the gay movement, ei parades, drag queens, sexual overtones in everyday life ( Will and Grace). What people do in the privacy of ones bedroom is there business, what people do and how they are percieved in the money making professional world is yet another. Ellen learned her lesson the hard way, as did Rosie. People do not mind if you are gay, they just don't want it thrown in their faces and do not want to hear or think about the details. If you really want to make the furture better for gays and lesbians, act mature and intelligent. That is what Merv did, that is what Jodie Foster is trying to do.
LET'S MOVE ON FROM THIS WHOLE IS S/HE OR ISN'T S/HE GAY THING. NO ONE CARES. SERIOUSLY…NO ONE CARES BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MATTER.
MYSPACE.COM/SILVERSIDEBAND
oh plz stop talking about dead ppl. its so bad.so what if he was gay.will its kinda of hard.i mean the man lived his whole life like a normal man
Perez didn't say this. He is citing an article by Ray Richmond in the "Hollywood Reporter." Can't you morons read?
Spade, believe me, no one who is gay wants anything from you, approval or otherwise. The idea is just to leave gay people alone, and not discriminate against them (us). That's all. Not special treatment. Not approval. Just fairness. With your apparent ignorance, you would be just about the last person on Earth that gay people would want approval from.
Why CAN'T gays be closeted ones? Why do they HAVE to come out of the closet if they DON'T WANT to? HELLO??????????? Leave them alone. Not everyone wants to disclose their personal lives.
You, Perez and your minions, want to feel validated with your gayness but seeing all gays set their sex lives on stage. They don't want to so stop bitching about it.
Most people, even gays, don't define their very existence by who they prefer to bed, just the one's obsessed with sex. Its like defining who you are by your preference of red wine over white. The real issue is why do people find this subject worthy of an article. Seriously, someone's sex life shouldn't even be part of their bio.
Well said.
go ANGIE -
What she said is the truth written and God will judge..
So it was written that one day the world would just lay down and accept homosexuality as a "norm"
So - its supposed to happen to fulfill prophecy… Still does not make being gay any less of a sin.
open your eyes people, see the truth & live by it! Quit taking the easy way out!
This guy is a piece of shit like Mel. I bury that cockroach. What he ever do for me?!
Glad this greedy turd is gone. Another one bites the dust!
…amen sista!!!…
Since when is someone's sexuality supposed to be displayed in the public arena?
Who cares if Merv was gay? Who cares if Jodie Foster is gay?
It is none of anyone's business!
Sexuality is something that should be kept private and a modest person understands that. Merv was obviously modest enough to know not to display his sexuality in the public arena where he would have been labeled accordingly. He knew that he need not be defined by his sexuality….so stop focusing on whether or not someone is gay or straight. Focus on whether or not he/she is a good or kind person.
peace
Just as the Media is biased, portrays every ethnic minority as if they are evil or terrorists, labels and stereotypes everyone, and runs headlines on shit that is next to nothing trivial when so much is going on around the world.nobody stops for a moment to think about and what they can do to try to better anything around them. The Gay community to me is a Culture, just as any culture and I respect and love them as I do any of my worldly brothers and sisters. The news media Sucks as do the ignorance of society. Keep up the Good work perez you always put a smile on my face. I wish I could bump into you at coffee someday so I could buy you a chai !
Merv was in his eighties and old school. He had a fabulous life without scandal because he was a class act and he owed NO ONE any explanations about coming out or anything for that matter.
Merv lived his "true life." he just didn't want to be honest with the public. he preferred taking the public's money and being a LIAR. Now he's just another DEAD LIAR. Good riddance Merv. you'll never work in this town again.
How dare Ray Richmond…….I don't care if Merv was gay or not…..but the fact that he choose not to discuss it during his life should be enough for everyone. He made a choice. Now that he is dead, some prick decides he is going to "out" Merv? How is this for blunt - Fuck Off Ray Richmond, you have no right or reason to have written that article. The man died, and now you get brave - Fuck Off Ray Richmond!
Maybe it's because most people–even those who are accepting of others' lifestyle choices–are tired of having it thrown in our face who is actually a poop pusher. Seriously…I don't flaunt my heterosexuality to my gay friends. In fact, I don't talk about it at all, because there's no need to. By that same token, I don't need to hear about my friends taking the Hershey Highway. Live how you want, but poop sticks are disgusting to me.
POOP PUSHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please, even my grand mother has known since the late '60s that Merv was gay.
The best favor the gay community gets is when a non-hysteric gay man just goes about the business of living life as a dignified adult.
No one like the crass, brassy teenager attitude of straight teenagers or of "radical" gays.
Live your life without being an ass about it and guess what? People are too busy with their own lives and problems to even notice you, let alone hate you.
Most people have known that Merv was gay for years. Why does it matter now that he's dead? Who cares? It doesn't take away one bit for what he's done for television or the kind of person he really was.
I already knew Perv Griffin was gay. He picked up my uncle once back in the 70s (my uncle was hitchhiking) and tried to take him to a motel. That story's a family favorite.
to tell you the truth even if he had come out when his old ass was alive, i probably wouldn't have considered it groundbreaking or even pencilbreaking.
The idiot author says that if Merv came out, that would show the world that it's okay to be gay and younger, insecure gays would benefit from his example. Hahahahaha. People who are already homophobes wouldn't think "Oh, it must be okay to be gay" and change their attitude to "gay positive" if Merv or any other famous person came out. They'd just think, "oh my god, he's a fag too" and continue on with their miserable prejudices. Gays will come out when they receive support from their family and friends and stop getting beaten up and killed for something that is not a "choice" but is as natural to them as hetrosex is to straights. Oh yeah, and if all the religious nut jobs in the world would drop dead, it would help too.
here here. Gay people: By remaining in the closet, you are giving credence to the idea that you have something to be ashamed about.
Way to go blfstyk,
Wish 90% of the people on the planet dead.
Merv had so much to learn from you.
perez–I hope you will continue outing people. BEING GAY IS NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF!!
Let the man rest in peace
Way to go #83 blfstyk,
Wish 90% of the people on the planet dead.
Merv had so much to learn from you.
Merv was gay, but he was also a right wing Republican who hung out with Nancy Reagan. Did Nancy ever denounce the extreme forms of gay bashing in her political party? NO. They need religious fundamentalists to win the White House. Karl Rove had 11 states put gay marriage on the ballot in 2004, because he knew the right wing gay haters would come out of the woodwork to vote for it, and he was right. Merv wanted it both ways, he never condemned his own political party, he wanted to hang out with right wing power, and be gay. He did both by staying in the closet. That was his cowardly choice.
I've heard about and met young men for years who have had gay leasons with the late Griffin. He was into young boys (barely legal). Good for him, even at 22 I couldn't bang any of them cuz he had them all. Sad, and bitter.
It would've killed his career/enterprise if he'd come out.
It's the new millennium but there's still too many right-wing haters.
the ONLY reason Perez tries to out everybody is cause he is ashamed of himself and feels the need to find others to bring down to his level! Perez is deep down ashamed of acting on his gay feelings so he wants others to be that way as well. But I do like this site, just sick and tired of all the fag mumbo jumbo.
Merv — we always knew you were going down the HERSHEY HIGHWAY
Go, Perez! You and the Hollywood Reporter. Watching these posts, like there's something WRONG with being gay. Or something WRONG with being straight. Or wearing gold lame, or black leather, or jeans. Who cares, anymore?
Keep outing 'em, dude. One day, we'll all get over it.
Not all the religious people, Merc, just the religous "nut jobs." Read the words slowly if you have to. It takes a little longer but maybe you too can learn something.
Perez, you have sunk to a new low…outting the dead. For Christ' s sake, the man isnt even cold yet.
YOU SUCK.. and your boyfriend said you stink at it.
Because he was a business man who made his money based on the publics opinion of his TV shows.
Most of the RED STATES in the USA are still backward, rednecks and might protest his TV shows.
One man cant change the world. If the Beatles couldnt do it, no one can.
Because he was a business man who made his money based on the publics opinion of his TV shows.
Most of the RED STATES in the USA are still backward, rednecks and might protest his TV shows.
One man cant change the world. If the Beatles couldnt do it, no one can.
It is barbaric to intrude on people's sex lives. It is the essence of crude ugly American culture. Honor the man for the good in his life and give him a decent legacy. He does not deserve to be disrespected.
Because when you come out you get put in a little box called "the gay guy/girl"
He preferred to keep his private life private. Cowardly? Yeah.
But thats the reality of the USA. Its still a very homophobic country.