Home Videos Photos
Home >> Headline of the Week , Wacky, Tacky & True >> Headline Of The Week Weak

Headline Of The Week Weak

Filed under: Headline of the Week > Wacky, Tacky & True

hard_core_heavy_metal_midge.jpg

"Dwarf's penis gets stuck to vacuum cleaner"

You can't make this shiz up! CLICK HERE to read the article accompanying this headline.

Dwarf's penis gets stuck to vacuum cleaner

A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry.

Daniel Blackner, or Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf, was due to perform at the Circus of Horrors at the festival known for its oddball, offbeat performances.

The main part of his act was for him to appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member with a special apparatus.

The attachment broke before the performance and Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately let it dry for only 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required.

He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and … hospitalization.

"It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed A&E with a vacuum attached to me," Blackner said.

"I just wished the ground could swallow me up. Luckily, they saw me quickly so the embarrassment was short-lived."

    Posted: Aug 20, 2007 at 11:17 pm / Email this  »
    « Previous story
    What The Eff????
    Next story »
    Now This Is The Kind Of Protest We Like
    See All 82 Comments

    82 comments to “Headline Of The Week Weak”

    1. omg says – reply to this


      1

      omg

    2. mee says – reply to this


      2

      first

    3. nae says – reply to this


      3

      first

    4. patty says – reply to this


      4

      first

    5. sara says – reply to this


      5

      yaay

    6. Isis says – reply to this


      6

      LOL

    7. j says – reply to this


      7

      no way

    8. jen says – reply to this


      8

      wow…

    9. Simone says – reply to this


      9

      first !!! fuck u!

    10. Isis says – reply to this


      10

      LOL Too funny

    11. woo says – reply to this


      11

      hahaha

    12. Isabel says – reply to this


      12

      That is so gross!!!

      Merely-Flawed.com

    13. ashley says – reply to this


      13

      wow now i've heard everything…

    14. d. says – reply to this


      14

      dwarf´s pennis MEANS NOT "dwarf pennis" you stupid cunt

    15. alynda says – reply to this


      15

      first bitches

    16. HYPE PHOTOGRAPHY says – reply to this


      16

      LOLOLOLOLOL, WOW.

    17. Guess what... says – reply to this


      17

      It was YOU Perez!

    18. word says – reply to this


      18

      oh yeah no time for lube?

      www.myspace/todays_it_girl

    19. heather says – reply to this


      19

      yah for midgets!!!!

    20. dawg says – reply to this


      20

      heheh….. that's awfully funny!

    21. dvfan says – reply to this


      21

      perez
      do you listen to distorted view daily podcast?
      cause this story was featured on the show today

      (and maybe i'm first here)

    22. Joe B in SD says – reply to this


      22

      Awww, poor lil weenie :/

    23. Julie says – reply to this


      23

      NICE!

    24. ashley says – reply to this


      24

      damn!!

    25. P E T U N I A says – reply to this


      25

      too funny!

    26. tara26 says – reply to this


      26

      WTF?!

    27. woobie says – reply to this


      27

      EWW Grosssssssssss!

    28. Enidora says – reply to this


      28

      LMAO

    29. Kitty in Missouri says – reply to this


      29

      That little pecker head!

    30. JJ says – reply to this


      30

      eww nasty

    31. ME AND ONLY ME says – reply to this


      31

      HAHAH… That is funny

    32. Lauren says – reply to this


      32

      first

    33. Gella says – reply to this


      33

      another Darwin award

    34. Ariel R. Zombie says – reply to this


      34

      Snapsticks. =O

    35. MegO says – reply to this


      35

      HOT!

    36. omg says – reply to this


      36

      I WAS ACTUALLY FIRST.

    37. Angie From Chicago says – reply to this


      37

      lol lol lol. So it wasn't embarrassing to stand in front of everyone and do but it was embarrassing when it just didn't work right? I don't see the difference. Maybe its the pain factor but on the bright side, it didn't come off. I'm willing to bet the hospital staff laughed their asses off when he left.

    38. Xxx-Tina says – reply to this


      38

      OMG! what the fuk is his pee pee doing in the vacum?? haha… Poor "little" guy!

    39. Ecua says – reply to this


      39

      stupid

    40. Tasha says – reply to this


      40

      Ewwwww!!!

    41. jess says – reply to this


      41

      whhhhat? that's so disgusting.

    42. Mikey says – reply to this


      42

      Is that Tom Cruise getting into the leather scene in Germany?

    43. CUTLOUS says – reply to this


      43

      Capt. Dan the Dwarf "HOSER" man he should've blown in the other end!!!

    44. jenbunny says – reply to this


      44

      that's disturbing.

    45. Bytch says – reply to this


      45

      That sucks……and not in the good way.

    46. Rash Manly says – reply to this


      46

      Is that the same guy who puts his
      tounge on cold ice trays and a flagpole
      in the middle of winter and gets stuck?
      .
      Not that I ever did that.
      More than once.
      .
      Rash Manly therashreport.com :-(

    47. a.j. says – reply to this


      47

      well Shaggy where da hell have ya been see you dropped poor scooby for a new lil' man.haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    48. boothmania says – reply to this


      48

      That happens, now he knows to be careful!

    49. Corn Julio says – reply to this


      49

      Look at that picture again and remember that THEY (Euro-PEONS) are the ones who feel superior to Americans! TWATS!

    50. wow says – reply to this


      50

      hahahaha i performed at this festival a couple years ago and saw this performance.

    51. *BabyGirl*69* says – reply to this


      51

      OMFG !!! thats absolutly the funniest thing i have ever heard of happening at a freakshow!!! hahaha!!! What a freak he is now!!! hahahha!!

    52. Krissy says – reply to this


      52

      Scary pic

    53. beckey says – reply to this


      53

      omfg!

    54. shizzle says – reply to this


      54

      Wow, it must be crazy midget summer — the midget from that TLC show was hit for DUI (twice), the other crazy midget thinks he a performance artist for his unfunny, druken rantings about Linsday Lohan, and this midget puts his piece in a vacuum. A soon-to-be reality show on TLC: Small People Small Brains.

    55. Jessica says – reply to this


      55

      Love these weird stories, keep 'em up!

    56. lily merlin says – reply to this


      56

      what is that person next to the dwarf..looks like justin hawkins

    57. sunisami says – reply to this


      57

      Don't worry possum… They've seen it all before… Maybe….

    58. Werewoman says – reply to this


      58

      The embarassment was short lived! Priceless!

    59. maddii says – reply to this


      59

      hahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa suc

    60. kimmie says – reply to this


      60

      now how cum they dont have that kind of show here i love lil people but hooked up to a vacuum now thats a turn on (i know im sick)

    61. Nigel says – reply to this


      61

      Pip pip and Cherio…I am Nigel Remington III. My stage name is 'Oscar from Grouchington'…I too am a wee little person and like my good friend Dan the Demon Dwarf, I also am an entertainer. And like Dan, I have also had a bad experience with a household 'tool' in my stage show.
      You see, my skit is a knock off from the show on the tele the yankess know as 'Sesame Street'. I live in a garbage can (small garbage can, of course) and from time to time will come out and talk with the bitty tots as they pass through the carnival. As luck would have it, one summer when we were working the streets of Liverpool, my station of the show was right next to the 'Winston's Fish and Chips' area. As I was walking behind the stage area to craw into my garbage can for my day's performance, my costume tail became caught up in the potato chopper for Winston's most excellent fries…As the horrible contraption pulled me closer and closer to the flailing blades, my screams became louder and louder. Just as I thought my short time on earth was about to end, Winston disengaged the machine from the power source and I was saved.
      So please, accept this as a plea for those of us vertically challenged show workers to be on high alert when around anything electric. We can't be too careful…

      Warmest Regards,

      Nigel…aka Oscar from Grouchington

    62. Lisa from Norway says – reply to this


      62

      Sorry Perez!
      Your blog is very boring! Start to live your own life…..

    63. kris says – reply to this


      63

      wow

    64. d-stizz says – reply to this


      64

      hahahahaha well I hope next time he'll learn and switch to sticky tac…or at the very least duct tape. Maybe this could be some sorty of new advertising campaign…"when you don't want to fully commit to your act…"

    65. carlos says – reply to this


      65

      OMG that is soo HOT…SOOOO Fetch!!

    66. abby says – reply to this


      66

      hahahaha

    67. x says – reply to this


      67

      That photo was not originally attached to the article. It was taken by the famous dj DAMIAN LAZARUS at a rave in Mexico.

    68. boston says – reply to this


      68

      wow, this made my day

    69. twinklinstarr99 says – reply to this


      69

      LOL. With glue what the heck do you expect? This is too freaky lol

    70. Heidi Ho says – reply to this


      70

      even the em-bare-ass-ment was SHORTlived, haha.

    71. Heidi Ho says – reply to this


      71

      even the em-bare-ass-ment was SHORTlived, haha. tom cruise in germany - now that's funny!!!

    72. jabberwocky says – reply to this


      72

      "short-lived" ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    73. Lynzie says – reply to this


      73

      not sure about this story with the pic… but Ive had this picture in my photobucket account for a couple years now…

    74. Lance Bass is an ASS says – reply to this


      74

      Lance BAss can kiss my ass. I heard that so many times. ABout how hard he is to work with and that he is egotistacaly rude. So he can go to hell as fae as I am concerned, He also gives gay folks a bad name in my opinion. What a jerk!

    75. BORAT says – reply to this


      75

      I rilly likeYS tha man in the behinds bright pants. I want pair for my holiday back in Croatia with those Hiltons sisters - pleases could anyone let me knowses where to find a pair for mes to wear? Thanky yous very much. Borat.

    76. Borat says – reply to this


      76

      I will get many many sexys times in those pants with Paris HIltons.

    77. BORAT says – reply to this


      77

      That midget looks like my sister - the number three prositute in all of kazakstan. Waa Waa Waa!!!!

    78. mia says – reply to this


      78

      Retard! There's his 15 minutes of fame… now he'll forever be known as "the midget who got his dick stuck in a vacuum".

    79. Pamzie says – reply to this


      79

      LMAO.
      Nice.

    80. Momsie says – reply to this


      80

      Sorry about your man!!!

    81. DE says – reply to this


      81

      That picture is ancient!!! I have gotten it several times in an email circulated called "Why women remain single". If the story did happen…. I doubt it was that wierd little guy!!!

    82. Dubravka says – reply to this


      82

      ew
      haha,ha
      ew..