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"Inside the Sad, Bizarre World That Was the Lauren Conrad Show"
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[Image via WENN.]
Inside the Sad, Bizarre World That Was the Lauren Conrad Show
Attending last night’s Lauren Conrad Collection show at L.A.'s Fashion Week felt a lot like being dropped into the middle of an episode of The Hills — potentially juicy, questionably styled, ultimately a bit plotless, and yet strangely amusing. The celebrity turnout was limited to exactly the people you’d expect from that show and its sister soap, Laguna Beach. Well, and Lisa Rinna, who would attend the opening of a mouth. Presumably Putty Lips was there as a buyer for her L.A. store, Belle Grey, because after the show we heard her waxing annoying about how quickly her store sold out of Conrad’s first line; she called the latest collection “fresh, young, innovative…and fresh.” She had one of those things correct.
But first, the gossip: We spotted L.C.’s roommate Audrina Patridge wearing a long teal dress and pots of foundation — later, when she almost ran us down in her shiny, white two-door Mercedes Benz, we couldn’t help but notice her car had a Jeannie Bueller air about it that was in sync with Audrina’s weirdly eighties-style eyeliner. Considering she was essentially there to drum up press for MTV, we found it a bit surprising that she actually had to drive herself to the venue. Call your PR person, Audrina. Surely you’ve got one.
Inside, Audrina chatted up new regular Hills cast member Lo Bosworth and ol' standby Whitney Port, who looked very tall and pretty in person. In a refreshing moment of modesty, Whitney rather endearingly chose not to walk through the special red-carpet photo-op area and seemed sort of surprised when the photographers wouldn’t let her escape so easily. The girls were seated cheek by jowl with Lauren’s ex Brody Jenner, who spent the entire show tapping his feet to the music and giving finger guns to someone seated across the runway — possibly Lauren’s other ex and maybe-current boyfriend, Stephen Colletti. And because this was very clearly an MTV joint, which requires maximum drama even at a fashion show, we also spotted L.C.’s former arch-rival and ex-girlfriend of both Brody AND Stephen (you’re following this, right?), Laguna Beach’s Kristin Cavallari. She greeted both dudes enthusiastically, wandering into the venue twenty minutes after everyone else (and twenty minutes after they were seated and the media mob had left the runway) and frantically trying to yank up her low-rise jeans to prevent any unfortunate flashing incidents. We overheard her telling a reporter that she is SO single right now, and has NO — emphasis hers — plans to return to reality television, which may effectively quash those pesky rumors that she’s appearing on The Hills. Sadly, considering the circumstances, there were no screaming confrontations, crying jags, bitch slaps, or passionate kisses.
Also absent from the venue was anyone recognizable from Lauren’s former place of employment (er, “employment”), Teen Vogue, any celebrities willing to admit they totally love The Hills, or any decent fashion. We don’t say that with (much) glee. We went into the show completely prepared to like it, to be embarrassed by liking it, and to spend the rest of the week being defensive about liking it. This did not happen. Lauren claimed the line was inspired by her recent trip to Paris, and given how obviously and ham-handedly this influence was translated into the clothes, we’re frankly surprised she didn’t style the girls with baguettes and giant wheels of Brie. Let’s just say…there were berets involved, and, overall, the collection was sadly kind of tragique. We expected a line of derivative but serviceably-adorable cocktail dresses much like what Lauren herself wears around town — you know, the type of stuff she probably bought a season ago from BCBG and loved. Instead, we got paper-thin leggings with lazy and plain triangle shirts, cheap-looking fabric more befitting a Target line than anything you’d pay boutique prices for, and a terrible color palette that would give Michael Kors an aneurysm.
We understand the desire to strike while the iron of her celebrity is hot, but, overall, the effort felt very young, in the sense that Lauren probably needs a few more years of design school before she’s ready to take on anything this ambitious. Photos do the line more favors than an up-close look — hardly anything was properly fitted, many of the dresses bunched in the back, and one model’s boobs were totally squeezing out of the top of her dress. Our greatest moment of joy was seeing Chantal, the runner-up from last cycle of America’s Next Top Model, strutting down the runway — but even that was tinged with sadness, because, seriously, the girl still cannot walk and may even have regressed since she was last under the tutelage of Miss J.
L.C.’s friends tried their best, but mostly they wore very careful non-expressions on their faces. Whitney, in particular, seemed to be holding onto her poker face like grim death, probably because she realized how savaged her friend would be if any actual fashion press had attended. When an obviously relieved Conrad finally came out for her bow, only Cavallari stood for her initially, but the others got up once they realized what was happening and the room was full of extremely polite smiles. So despite all that dramatic potential, in the end, we found ourselves aching for Spencer and Heidi to storm the fortress and cause some real shenanigans. After all, as much as we don’t look to the MTV crowd for edgy fashion inspiration, we really don’t turn to it for lessons in manners.
FIRST
thats heartbreaking,”
first =]
first
OMG I am not 1st. Get a life suckers.
FIRST
wow
first!
First?
THIS BITCH IS A SKANK
top 10!!!
aww, poor lauren
i hate her passionately
her style always sucked
1stt,,,
Does anyone actually care about her anymore?
#1
1st
first!
gahhhh she gets on my nerves
wow
first. i like her clothing line.
Lame
first
estupido?
sadddd
1
poor lauren
!
her dream has been crushed
who cares? we need more bitch fight!
too long to read
who frickin cares about this talentless girl? seriously
first
FIRST!!! her clothes suck…shes a media whore with no talent *yet*…
shes too young and quite frankly, she lives in a dream world aka LA
AAAWWW! thats so sad! Tear!
LOL.
Re: angeline – I AGREE…COULD SOMEONE SUMMARIZE IT..LOL
She has lost a lot of weight. She looks gorgeous
nice purse
that's what happens when you try to do things that's out of your league
thats so sad its funny. i like her but stick to tv.
Biyatch
Who the fuck cares?Not me…But I had nothing better to do before my date and read this shit,,I hope to fuck I don't mention that I read this to anyone…
oh snap!
LA FASHION WEEK IS A JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LAUREN CONRAD IS A JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and anyone who buys her cheap ugly looking clothes are A BIGGER JOKE
OMG!
ahahaha that is WAAAAY OOO!
lauren must be seething right now.
Perez, you should credit the gofugyourself girls for this article…..or nymag at least…
first!!
who the fuck is she?
honestly tho, Heidi's line looks so much better. i actually like some of her clothes. Whitney's one sounds interesting, cocktail dresses etc. wltc
how dare you steal this from the 'Go fug yourself' girls without permission- wanker
The Hills is the worst show I've ever watched. That's all I've got to say
I read this like a week ago.
Keep up, tubby!
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Ugh, her hair looks so ugly and broke in that picture. Just because you can put together other people clothing nice doesn't mean you can design shit for yourself dumb bitch. I cannot stand that dumb show with ugly PUPILS AT THE TOP OF HER EYES Audrina with her ugly rat teeth, plain looking Whitney, and HORSEFACE Heidi!!
It it me or when Heidi came back from having all that surgery Spencer looked different too? I swear he looks different?
That just shows that non-designers shouldn't try to be designers. Go and find something you're good at.
Thats from gofugyourself.com! I love them!
wow she looks thinner but in a good way
WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS BITCHES PORN TAPE???
JASON NAKED HER NAKED WE ALL KNOW WE WANT TO SEE THEM FUCKING!
SHE NEEDS TO GET HERSELF BACK TO REAL LIFE, THIS HOLE IM A CELEBRITY THING IS FACK AS FUCK.
TRUTH.
20th?
she looks thinner than ever. too thin?
WHO CARES WHAT SOME JEALOUS BITCH SAYS ABOUT HER LINE…HER JOB IS TO CRITIQUE THE LINE AND SHE WROTE THIS TO MAKE PEOPLE READ IT. OBVIOUSLY IT WORKED. BEING A HATER MAKES PEOPLE READ
this person just wrote what they thought people wanted to hear. what a bitch. i was there and i thought she was greatly exagerating. the clothes looked great
I totally thought that was Nicole Richie. Sorry L.C.
I love the writing in this article. It's smart, wity, detailed and….TRUE. Lauren can try all she wants for a respectable clothing line, but let's face it, it won't get anywhere past MTV. They probably had a BIG part in getting her this gig at fashion week. Good luck with the next one.
Re: ssssss – SHE IS THIN!!! i saw her yesterday when this picture was taken…like 2 ft away from her and she is TINY..she must be only like 5'2 or 5'3
who wrote this perez!! i needs to know! lol this was sad and funny! and im a total conrad fan ! i live for the drama !
The only thing I have to say about this entire article is… duh?
Perez, you could at least say where the article came from! give us the source of the article!
This use to be my favorite show, but now… the drama is so stupid. Why does anyone even give a fuck anymore.
Stool
Re: nikki – UM DUH. Click on the title of the article and it takes you to newyorkmag. C'mon now.
wow, way to show your sources. this article was written by the lovely ladies at gofugyourself.com for New York Magazine. Give them some cred!!!!!!!
why did i even waste my time reading this.? who the hell cares!?
damn i feel stupid! lol
That's too much shit to read. I lost interest after the first paragraph…
Im sorry for LC cause i love her but she didnt have fashion taste to desing…..her desings for me are very poorly
This article is written by the fug girls, gofugyourself.com
Perez seems to find a lot of inspiration there, with the newer voting polls and random fashion posts
Funny site (gfy, not perez)
http://nymag.com/daily/fashion/2008/03/inside_the_sad_bizarre_world_t.html i actually like the middle shirt n the last :S
((yawn))
like were they even expecting it to be any good?
lauren is so desperate…
The real question is.. "Would Lauren even wear her line??" You see her out in nice preppy style clothing that looks extremely expensive. Yet, her fashion line appears cheaper than something that you would get at Walmart. The prices for a plain white cotton dress is $185, that is literally a big piece of white frabic draped around a girl.. I don't even sew and I could make that for less than $5. There is nothing inspiring about this line o