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Headline of the Week Weak

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"A 13 year old boy from Texas is convicted of fraud after using his Father's credit cards to hire escorts."

P-I-M-P! CLICK HERE to read the article accompanying this headline.

[Image via Vanity Fair.]

A 13 year old boy from Texas is convicted of fraud after using his Father's credit cards to hire escorts.

A 13 year old from Texas who stole his Dad's credit card and ordered two hookers from an escort agency, has today been convicted of fraud and given a three year community order.

Ralph Hardy, a 13 year old from Newark, Texas confessed to ordering an extra credit card from his father's existing credit card company, and took his friends on a $30,000 spending spree, culminating in playing "Halo" on an Xbox with a couple of hookers in a Texas motel.

The credit card company involved said it was regular practice to send extra credit cards out as long as all security questions are answered.

The escort girls who were released without charge, told the arresting officers something was up when the kids said they would rather play Xbox than get down to business.

Police said they were alerted to the motel by a concerned delivery clerk, whom after delivering supplies of Dr Pepper, Fritos and Oreos had been asked by the kids where they could score some chicks and were willing to pay. They explained they had just made a big score at a "World of Warcraft" tournament and wanted to get some relaxation. On noting the boys age the delivery clerk informed the authorities.

When police arrived at the motel they found $3,000 in cash, numerous electronic gadgets, an Xbox video console with numerous games, and the two local escort girls.

Ralph had reportedly told police that his father wouldn't mind, as it was his birthday last week and he had forgot to get him a present. The father, a lawyer said he had been too busy, but would take him on a surprise trip to Disneyland instead.

Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a "World of Warcraft" tournament. They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played "Halo" on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling their sexual services.

Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician.

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246 comments to “Headline of the Week Weak”

More comments: [1] 2 3 »

  1. Shar says – reply to this


    1

    pimp

  2. HAHAHAHA says – reply to this


    2

    WTF? that is hilairious!

  3. HAI says – reply to this


    3

    OMJESUS

  4. rob says – reply to this


    4

    Why fuck with Miley Cyrus. Perez your So Tacky

  5. woot says – reply to this


    5

    hahahhahhahahhaha…that is just too funny!!!!
    *
    *
    *
    BTW…NICE PIC! LOL!!

  6. smegma says – reply to this


    6

    FIRST FUCKERS

  7. ethel says – reply to this


    7

    Why is there a pictue of Billy Ray and Miley Cyrus shown with this article?

  8. jim says – reply to this


    8

    ralph should have got his dick sucked at least

  9. Megan says – reply to this


    9

    Wow.

  10. Ashley says – reply to this


    10

    What does that have to do with that picture of Miley & Billy Ray?

    Speaking of which. Is it just me or is she a little too close with daddy?

  11. LAYLA says – reply to this


    11

    second!!!!!!

  12. Jorge says – reply to this


    12

    Haha nice!

  13. kakak says – reply to this


    13

    hahahaha

    that's a male miley cyrus there!

  14. Christina says – reply to this


    14

    What does that picture have to do with a 13 year old hiring escorts?

  15. ash says – reply to this


    15

    1st

  16. yo mama says – reply to this


    16

    Kids are f'd these days!

  17. Erin says – reply to this


    17

    Now that is one future playa!!!!

  18. ML says – reply to this


    18

    I find it creepy to see a father and daughter so touchy, touchy, feely, feely! I don't think I would ever be in that position with my dad; and i LOVE my day!

  19. Metal Gear says – reply to this


    19

    Haha…that was actually funny

  20. kitannaluvsedward&jacob says – reply to this


    20

    ha ha stupid kid hes in the right footsteps of becoming a politician dumbasses

  21. KL says – reply to this


    21

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHAHHA THATS COMMEDDYYYYYY

  22. Trista Hilton says – reply to this


    22

    LMFAO!!! PRICELESS! DING DING!

  23. >.>' says – reply to this


    23

    wat does miley cyrus have to do w/ this?

  24. lisa says – reply to this


    24

    omg. they had hooker and instead played HALO?
    WTF
    WHAT?
    looks like they havent hit puberty yet!
    or maybe. maybe they are just IDIOTS. hahah.
    jk.

  25. BITCH says – reply to this


    25

    WHY DO U HAVE TO PUT THAT PIC THERE, U ARE SOOO MEAN!!!

  26. gavinguy says – reply to this


    26

    kids are so much more hornier these days!! lol..

  27. shari says – reply to this


    27

    this is fucking hilarious……. these kids will be telling this story til theyre like 50

  28. tw says – reply to this


    28

    americans…

  29. Rumer says – reply to this


    29

    I'm mad you have a picture of Miley Cyrus hahaaaaaaa…..TOO FUNNY….U DEA WRONG 4 THIS

  30. Christ says – reply to this


    30

    That is very funny. I love the part about people of restricted growth traveling with the circus!! Classic. I wonder if the escorts got paid for there time! lol

  31. emma says – reply to this


    31

    This kid has style!

  32. This is Wrong!!!! says – reply to this


    32

    This Picture is Downright 100% sick, This is nothing but Suggestive Sex, and between a father and child daughter, this is HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!,Vanity Fair, and especially Annie Liebowitz and Billy Rae and His Wife, shoule be behind bars right now.

  33. Ugh says – reply to this


    33

    Wow. There are some SLOWWW people on here. What does Miley have to do with this??? It's comedy, idiots. Little kids being crazy fuckers…THAT'S what it has to do with it.

  34. also This is Wrong Forgot to say... says – reply to this


    34

    oh and … Miley's hip look like the size of Rhode Island, She is huge.!!!!

  35. Vote Ralph in 2050! says – reply to this


    35

    So, do any of you remember that Disney movie "Blank Check" where that little kid wrote himself a check for $1 million? This is totally it. I can just see the kid now…wearing some pimped out sunglasses and hanging with some slutty chicas. I like him already.

  36. boobs are hot says – reply to this


    36

    what does it have to do with miley cyrus? nothing and everything! perez is making a connection between an oversexed 13 yr old kid and a (more famous) oversexed 15 yr old kid. LOVE you perez!

  37. ddh says – reply to this


    37

    that's way too funny, honestly… the best line "Ralph wants to be a politician."

  38. liz says – reply to this


    38

    that picture of miley and billy ray is fucking GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  39. Chaz says – reply to this


    39

    Re: ML – There is nothing creepy about the photo. It's a great, natural portrait. Open your eyes and your mind. Why are so many Americans Puritanical!

  40. mackenzie says – reply to this


    40

    so funny!

  41. WTF says – reply to this


    41

    Well, he will make a damn good lawyer….natural born liar..that's a damn shame..these kids today are scary as hell…I hope I die in my sleep and don't have to end up in a nursing home with them to care for me!

  42. truly amazing says – reply to this


    42

    this is just hilarious. it's amazing how he wants to be a politician.

  43. Yvette says – reply to this


    43

    Re: Ashley
    i was wondering the same thing this has nothing to do with miley and her father and she is a bit tooo close to him.

  44. kirr says – reply to this


    44

    Where were the kids parents I think the parents should pay the credit card bill

  45. lo lo says – reply to this


    45

    I LOVE YOUR PAGE. AND MILEY CYRUS USE TO LIVE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD
    SHE IS A BITCH….AND SKANK

  46. Eme says – reply to this


    46

    I really love this picture.

    As for the article, what the hell. : |

  47. Michelle says – reply to this


    47

    omg so he payed these hoes like $3000 so he could play xbox with him? He needs to get a life.

  48. steph says – reply to this


    48

    hahah thats halarious

  49. I LOVE WOW says – reply to this


    49

    OMG THAT IS HILARIOUS!!! I LOVE WORLD OF WARCRAFT AND AM ADDICTED TO IT LOL.. BURNING BLADE BABY!

  50. woot says – reply to this


    50

    IS HE WEARING A HALTER TOP?!! HEHEHHEHE

  51. crazed says – reply to this


    51

    I'll bet Dr. Phil is on a plane to go talk to this kid right now. He'll be pushing for an "exclusive".

  52. piazzasbuttplug says – reply to this


    52

    His boner was sticking her in the armpit, and she kept cracking up!

  53. Your S/M Girlfriend says – reply to this


    53

    Perez!! I always thought that was a totally *squicky* photo session that that innocent wage earner had with her father. But sweet boy, I have to ask you … what does some horny pubescent teen using daddy's credit card have to do with some poor little girl who is being pimped out for $$$$

  54. Undead Warlock says – reply to this


    54

    Dude that picture of Miley and her Daddy IS a wee bit too close and I'm not a "Puritanical American." Oh yes, and WoW is the shit. What I'll do is make my husband go down on me while I'm pvp'ing and slamming ally face.

  55. M says – reply to this


    55

    ralph will most likely become the next eliot spitzer. congratulations buddy.

  56. j says – reply to this


    56

    Lmfaoooo!!!

  57. hah! says – reply to this


    57

    lmfao! hilarious! Fukking 13 year old boy with some hookers. omg!

  58. Kaye says – reply to this


    58

    When I'm hanging out playing Halo during the weekend I usually like to order up some hookers to play on live with.

  59. Bon says – reply to this


    59

    Okay, maybe I'm wrong, but isn't it common practice NOT to reveal the names of under age criminals?? Or is that just in Canada?

  60. SHIT FOR BRAINS KIDS THESE DAYS says – reply to this


    60

    OK….HOOKERS PLAYED HALO WITH THESE NERDS?
    WHAT A COUPLE MINI DOUCHE BAGS THESE BOYS ARE.

  61. Angel says – reply to this


    61

    That kid is actually pretty smart. He's gunna get into HUGE trouble when he gets older

  62. Kate says – reply to this


    62

    Fucking Brilliant!

  63. Chaz says – reply to this


    63

    Re: This is Wrong!!!! – People who think that there is something suggestive and dirty with this photo are only showing that they have a dirty mind.

  64. HARDBONES says – reply to this


    64

    Thats are future president. PIMP

  65. Aly says – reply to this


    65

    Wow. That's hilarious.

  66. CHIP OFF THE OLD BLOCK says – reply to this


    66

    I BET HIS DAD IS A GOOD LAWYER, THE KID SURE HAS ALL BASES COVERED IN HIS STORY!
    GOTT LOVE HIM FOR HIS INGENIOUSNESS!!!

  67. lir says – reply to this


    67

    the arm looks so far away from the body!!! this looks odd-I dont see the comparison
    >.

  68. fsgdfg says – reply to this


    68

    well you gotta give it to the Kid, he is smart, lol.

    good for the escorts for having fun with the situation and playing XBOX, lol.

  69. Dayna says – reply to this


    69

    "Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician."

    LOL.
    that made me giggle.

  70. missfit says – reply to this


    70

    oh i love this story!!! f'n hillarious!!!

  71. lefty lady says – reply to this


    71

    Wow,. The Miley-Billy Ray pic. is kind of disturbing.

  72. Nicole says – reply to this


    72

    THIS is the funniest fucking thing I've EVER heard!
    hahahaha

  73. bahah says – reply to this


    73

    hahaahah. this kid is ridiculous.

  74. lol says – reply to this


    74

    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!

  75. me says – reply to this


    75

    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!
    OPRAH HAS JUMPED THE SHARK!

  76. nanci says – reply to this


    76

    PIMP…little bastard Disneyland not good enough!

  77. ruby says – reply to this


    77

    I was really down in the dumps and this REALLY made me laugh out loud! THANKS PEREZ! YOU MADE MY DAY!! :)

  78. Isaiah says – reply to this


    78

    This kid is fucking awesome…..

  79. lauren. says – reply to this


    79

    good on you ralph - a politician. follow in eliot spitzers footsteps

  80. lara says – reply to this


    80

    go ralph!

  81. EEEDIOTS says – reply to this


    81

    It's an obvious fake. Notice how there are no names, dates, or direct quotes. Oh, and it's strange how he committed the crime, his father pressed charges, he was convicted, and he was sentenced all in one day.

    The telling thing though: no one is credited with writing it - not a local paper, AP, or Reuters. "money.co.uk" definitely doesn't have a reporter in fucking Newark, Texas - a town under 1,000 people.

  82. Ily says – reply to this


    82

    Re: rob – Uh, no Rob, you're tacky. You have no sense of humor and pathetic rationality. And, I bet you're a 13 year old Hannah Montana fan who is secretly a girl named Monica living in a basement but wishes she could be Miley Cyrus and wastes her life on PerezHilton.com defending a slutty celebrity everyday of your life. Move on.

  83. becky says – reply to this


    83

    HAHAHA
    this is priceless

  84. April says – reply to this


    84

    HAHAHAHA. that boy is brilliant.

  85. is it me? says – reply to this


    85

    Is it just me or is that picture of her with her dad completely inappropriate. It's creepy sexy which makes me want to take a shower.

  86. someone says – reply to this


    86

    Wow, lmao no way this is way to freaking far fetched to be real!!! This seriously sounds like some Family Guy or Simpsons episode where Bart or Stewie still their drunks father's credit card. At least the kid already has the sex scandals to make it in politics.

  87. Brian says – reply to this


    87

    i fucking love this kid!!!!
    thats absolutely hilarious……although very wrong…….its so fucked up….what are kids comming to these days? its like another hippie generation…..(which would be pretty awesome) might i add. okay thats all
    thanks for nothing.

  88. p1tey1 says – reply to this


    88

    This is almost too funny to be true. WOW!

  89. H-Vizzle says – reply to this


    89

    L.M.F.A.O.
    They should make a movie out of this!!!

  90. Perez is a hypocrite says – reply to this


    90

    You call this little punk ass kid a PIMP (even in jest) and yet a picture of some girl's back makes her a whore? You're an idiot! This is what is wrong with the world…how is it that a sexually promiscuous girl is a whore but the same type of guy is a pimp? It's ridiculous!

  91. Carolyn says – reply to this


    91

    Ahahaha wow that sucks. At least the hookers didn't have to sell their bodies; and yet they got paid to play halo.

  92. Lu says – reply to this


    92

    I call bullshit…

  93. Michele says – reply to this


    93

    that picture is AMAZING though!
    Don't quite get why the article is accomanied with the picture!

  94. Cece says – reply to this


    94

    Is this boy related to Slutty Cyrus?

  95. Crystal says – reply to this


    95

    Why would he hire hookers and not have sex with them? It doesn't make any sense. He's definitely lying there. It seems like the escorts didn't want to get busted for engaging in sex with a minor.

  96. LookAtYou says – reply to this


    96

    I thought this sight is suppose to be about celebrity gossip. Who cares about a some bad kids out giving their parents a nightmare. You need to get up off your fat ass and start doing some real reporting and not some second hand garbage that people can get on their own by surfing the net.

  97. Kate says – reply to this


    97

    Wow. That is MESSED UP.

  98. andrea says – reply to this


    98

    You're a true comedian, P. That last line is hilarious about him aspiring to be a politician. Hahahaha

  99. Disturbing Picture says – reply to this


    99

    Am I the only one who finds this picture disturbing?

  100. ... says – reply to this


    100

    Re: This is Wrong!!!! – How is it suggestive sex? It's a picture so calm down. It's not like she's touching him in a horny way.

    Either way the article is jokes

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