Mrs. Cashole: The Only Smile You're Getting From Her!
Filed under: Jessica Alba
Jessica "Don't Call Me Latina" Alba just got married in secret and that half smirk is the best she could do.
It's probably a reflection of her relationship with new husband Cashole Warren!
There's no honeymoon for Alba and her wife.
The pair hit up the 2008 Celebration of Mentoring on Tuesday night at the Beverly Hills Hotel.
For her sake, we sure hope she got that prenup taken care of!
[Photo via Getty Images.]
Posted: May 21, 2008 at 9:47 am



Congrats to the happy couple !
Perez, I don't get why you're so mean to them ?!?!?!
Ay Que UGLY!
perez, so angry so early in the am, RELAX!!
Re: Emilie – He's mean to them because they don't bother with him! If she says hi to him one day…He'll be kissing their asses!!!
big veins in the boobs
damn i was almost first anyways i dont see what the fascination is with this bitch
Note to Jessica: Its okay to go a size up.
Yeah that dress looks like it's cutting off her circulation. Congrats to them!~
FIRST…..She looks really happy…Good for her…
Perez you were getting cool and chill but this week many of your posts have been pointlessly mean-spirited again. I'm disappointed.
she really sucks.
Danm you can see the vains and in her boobs, I guess she is not as perfect as she thinks she is. He is also one ugly SOB!!!
haha she looks fat. awesome. what a bitch
What the fuck is up with all those veins in her tits? GROSS!
I bet it's because of the guy's name.
C-asshole….
a name like that can't be a good sign!
She isn't proud to be latino, and he isn't gay. Those are the reasons Perez does not like them. er is right though. He is an ass kisser when he gets attention.
damn she got fat quick!
Everytime this girls name or photo shows up on your site you turn into a raving bitch. Chill out.
what is it with this guy, why is she so into him?
they will be divorced by the time the kid is three. i hope she got a prenup
damn she's fat
Boy…..she sure has those boobies of hers SMASHED in that dress!!!
Perez- your really sounding like a hater. what's with all the negativity?
the big veins are from pregnancy…she looks better than angelina.
At least she is not fake and not pretending to be "happy", like the fake Brangelina.
.
I prefer honesty to fake posturing.
leave her alone! Perez you can be such a boy-c#nt! let it rest.
She looks like a miserable bitch!!! I give this shotgun marriage 6 months!
eewwww….. i dont want to look at your veiny boobs
Perez, ENOUGH ALREADY! I hope they are happy and I wish you would stop being such a dick to her. Damn man, it isn't her fault she grew up in a family that had acclimated to the American way of life and didn't teach her Spanish or make her delve into her roots. Shit, I've got German ancestors and I don't spreken da Deutch or know shit about where my family came from. BACK OFF!
I know we shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but Jessica Alba looks truly miserable. As usual. It's really unfortunate for her new marriage and new baby. I can't imagine her child seeing photos of her pregnancy and noting how truly unhappy she looks to be starting a family. Not to mention, I do feel a tad sorry for Cash because she looks so disgusted being seen with him or that he is associated with her life. I'm sure no one enjoys their third trimester, but why get married if you're just going to appear to hate every aspect of starting a family? How ungrateful.
I think she just looks content
She always looks so unhappy.
its probably hard to smile when you are in sooo much pain because your bewbs are squished into a dress….
i hope she didnt get a prenup once he takes all her money she'll be stretched out and ugly so she wont get by on her looks and have to go back to her MEXICAN family for support…then will she be proud of her heritage probably not but then her family will get rid of her and she'll be working in Taco Bell
She is a miserable Latino whore!
I will never understand your vitriol hatred for Alba. Get over it, Perez.
He's hot. They are an extremely attractive couple. Congratulations!
I don't blame her, if I was a latina, I wouldn't want to admit it either
Re: v – You need to get screwed by a Latino(a) to know what good really is.
Re: a –
Been there done that, they are dirty and smelly and should be selling oranges at freeway entrances, again who would want to admit they're latina
Re: v – Fuck you asshole!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You're just jealous because everyone knows the most beautiful women in the world are latinas.
She's a talentless ass and he's FUGLY!!! I'll bet her girl will look just like him. Poor kid.
does anyone else notice the VEINS popping out in her boobs??? nasty.
i'm sure she smiles all the time, just not when she's being followed around by papperazi. she is stunning and so is cash so leave them alone, you're all just jealous anyway coz se wouldn't give any of you haters a second glance. peace! x
why you always have to talk trash about these two?..so what if she is not friendly towards the swarms of people that follow her?…she has the right to privacy….and why you dissin on Cash?…do you know his income?…just because he is behind the scenes doesn't mean he doesn't make his own money?…..they don't owe the public or anyone else a big wedding……..they are gorgeous and i am sure will produce a super gorgeous baby….i wish them the best for many years to come!
Perfect example of a woman who, although beautiful, looks ugly because she is so hateful and bitter
She looks amazing !!
Pregnancy does NOT agree with her.
WHY SO MEAN? You give her that stupid nickname that makes no sense. I'm sure she's quite happy with her heritage….give this expectant couple a break for heaven's sake.
jessica alba looks ugly pregnant. and super fat. i bet the weight wont come off. hoorah to perez for hating appropriately! she sucks it and he knows it!!
Re: Animal – That's from the milk glands. It's weird I know, not the prettiest thing to happen to a woman's body.
Re: Kat –
Only one thing worse than being latina(o) is being portuguese, they all smell like cod fish.
Wow she got FAT.
Re: Kate –
Hey you cant deni who you r! stop making excuses, just bcuz u dont know ne thing about your background doesnt mean you have to act like its not in your blood! What he probably means about her saying she's not latina is that she's probably ashamed, so fuck that bitch! She's fucken ashamed of herself and her family so thats why hes talking shit about her
I guess patience and understanding should only be granted to gays.
Come on Perez. It's time to let it go. If you want people to respect your choices and opinions in life, have a little for others. It's a good start.
I'm no Alba fan but you're an unfortunate , hypocrite of a broken record sometimes.
Of course the douche bag that is Perez Hilton fails to mention that Cash was being honored at the event for a documentary he made about gang violence in L.A….
Shutup perez already! I think Jessica is pretty and who cares what she said, how she said it. It was probably taken out of context anyway. And whats wrong with just saying you are American? She does live here in the UNITED STATES. I am really getting tired of you ragging on her because of a few statements she said.
.
.
.
She'll just skirt the bastard issue. Once she squirts out the little bugger out, said dude will be thrown to the side.
.
.
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Way to rope a guy that lost interest in you the first time around…get knocked up, get him to propose, have a semi-shot-gun wedding…THIS marriage is gonna LAST. (More like THIS woman annoys the hell out of me–)
If anything your robbed when you dont get a honeymoon so for all the ladys that say we are just so in love we dont need a honeymoon, yes you do! Honeymoons are once in a lifetime and they should be just as fab as the wedding if not more because its for you and you hubby! BTW his gross beard is a very bad sighn too!!
It's hard enough for marriages last; let alone one that's done because you're pregnant. Oh, by the way, what's with inserting Angelina and Brad in this thread. Some people have big issues about people they don't even know. That's just childish. As for the statement that Ms. Alba's not pretending she's happy, I haven' seen many photos of her where she's LOOKED happy. You can't tell happy from a photo. Whether she is or not isn't really anyone's business.
envy perez…envy
simply gorgeous. Beautiful mamma to be is glowing! It is not easy being pregnant, with hormones flying in all directions
She is so FUGLY and bitchy! This marriage will never last!
THROWING IT ALL AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Cash is already checking out other whores!!!!!!!
She looks like she's totally holding her breath-that dress looks real uncomfortable; man I remember when I was pregnant, that would hurt the old boobies! Is she trying to squish them into looking smaller, c'mon girl, get with the program. You should love your burgeoning bod.
Has anyone started a pool on how long it will last? if so put me in for five bucks on 5 months…
gross! you would think this spic could wear something that at least fit her right! she looks like a biscuit trying to pop outta the container! shes ugly and no one cares about her, her terrorist looking money hungry man whore or that little bastard baby. they think because they got married before it was born it wouldnt be one? wrong. just go way skankola!!!!! funny how this skank is always complaining about the paps follwing her everywhere, yet the dumb bitch sits outside and eats at the ivy and all the places you know the paps hang out at! i hate dumb cunts!!!
Perez:
I do NOT understand why you HATE Jessica Alba and LOVE Paris Hilton!
I just don't get it.
WHY, WHY, WHY????????
(please explain)
Re: v – v is sooo retarded… brainless piece of shit…. probably white…. off course!!
Re: Kat – Says you! I say Anglos are much better looking.
Re: Kat – Notice the only people who think latinas are the best looking women in the world are latinas….
I'm a white dude and I wouldn't have a latina. They're NASTY and that's all - shitty personalities.
Re: helen – She's pregnant, you stupid cunt.
I think she's lovely. Also, why do you say 'Alba and her wife' like being a wife is a less important role. Just because she makes more money or has more power doesn't make her or his role in the marriage less important. Being a woman is just as important as being a man and I don't think it's right for you to insult a man by saying he acts more like a stereotypical feminine role in the relationship. That shouldn't be seen as something bad. I'm very disappointed…
Re: notme – You're a fucking idiot. Not all latinas/latinos are the same, nor are all men/women the same. I can't believe how ignorant some people are. Making generalizations about a huge group of people is utterly absurd.