Slow Your Roll

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & True

This is something that we definitely will NOT be drinking! We need as much energy as we can get!

A beverage company has come out with an 'anti' energy drink called Drank.

Its tag line is "slow your roll." Pretty clever.

The drink's publicist called it the 'extreme relaxation beverage' that goes great with vodka.

The carbonated, grape-flavored beverage is spiked with melatonin, valerian root and rose hips.

What the heck?

Why?????

The creator was apparently thinking of the hip hop community when he concocted it.

The product's press release says, "From design to production, every aspect of this calming drink was inspired by today’s popular hip hop artists who embrace the much sought-after hip hop lifestyle that encourages people to capture a stress-free state of mind."

So, what we're gathering is that it's basically a pot high in a can or something that makes an E high last longer?

Drank up!

[Image via villagevoice]

Posted: Jun 4, 2008 at 6:30 pm / Email this »

See All 174 Comments

174 comments to “Slow Your Roll”

More comments: [1] 2 »

IRiSHMaFIA says – reply to this

1

Maybe this is meant to be a bedtime drink to help people get more zzzzzzzz's.

Otherwise why bother.
adriana banana says – reply to this

2

and why is it purple? because of grape soda? lol.. jk… oh well.. u gotta make money somehow.. oh and stupid kids will buy it just to be … "COOOOL!
moi says – reply to this

3

2ND
adriana banana says – reply to this

4

Maybe it works to calm your azz down!…
Graham says – reply to this

5

melatonin comes from Cow Brains.

delish.
yucky says – reply to this

6

ewww that sounds gross.
Laura says – reply to this

7

THATS FUCKING AWESOME.
Chelsea says – reply to this

8

whoa, nice… i wanna try it.
adriana banana says – reply to this

9

"From design to production, every aspect of this calming drink was inspired by today’s popular hip hop artists who embrace the much sought-after hip hop lifestyle that encourages people to capture a stress-free state of mind."
yo mam says – reply to this

10

First!
JGrigs says – reply to this

11

First?
smart says – reply to this

12

wat? stupid. fall asleep in a club. real cool. alcohol already is a depressant that makes the body slow/tired as it is!
bee says – reply to this

13

first?
Jackie says – reply to this

14

stupid
89080 says – reply to this

15

firsttttttt
Myzaree says – reply to this

16

If it's a pot high in a can then hook me up. And it's grape flavored too? Can't beat that.
jojo says – reply to this

17

because we like to get stoned!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Iheartfashion says – reply to this

18

Wtf? don't think anyone will buy that!
heathe says – reply to this

19

so cool
BOHOOO says – reply to this

20

FIRSTTTTTTT….BROWN POWERRRRRRRR WOOT WOOOTTT..
mightl says – reply to this

21

Darn it….second! I'll pass on that drink though….I like my energy!
isis says – reply to this

22

It's called two seconds of research, Perez.

Purple Drank is a slang term for a recreational drug popular in the hip-hop community of the Southern United States. Its main ingredient is prescription-strength cough syrup containing codeine and promethazine.[1]
raine says – reply to this

23

Perez…are you reading FARK.com again?
Grace says – reply to this

24

I'm not sure why they went for the hip-hop route, but beverages and foods with melatonin in them are very popular for a more natural sleep aid. So this drink is not really all that weird, aside from the marketing…
whitleeann says – reply to this

25

My husband works at a beer barn/frozen drink stand. The "hip hop" crowd get grape drinks and sodas and spike them with "Lean". Phenergran. That is totally what this drink is for.
Mel says – reply to this

26

No shit it extends your E high… "slow your roll"
Dipshit
Maedbhish says – reply to this

27

So basically they've made a date-rape drink? WTF?
Jenn says – reply to this

28

"GIMMIE SOME OF THAT PURPLE STUFFFFFFFF"
GRAPE DRANK!
genius says – reply to this

29

mother fucking genius, I will most definitely be trying this!
jenna says – reply to this

30

this sounds like something that would make you feel better when coming down off of an E high. Not something that would make the E high last longer.
iheart says – reply to this

31

I work in the beverage industry…this is not real! There is a popular mix of grape cough syrup (or other cold medicine) and 7-up going around and this is a spoof on that…
April says – reply to this

32

I actually take melatonin every night for my sleeping disorder. So this seems like a good idea to me. And to everyone that doesn't know what melatonin, well melatonin is a vitamin you can pick up at the any store like walmart or walgreens but it helps you fall asleep fast and stay asleep. You know when you eat turkey at Thanksgiving you are real tired afterwards and want to take a nice long nap, well melatonin is found in turkey.
WOW says – reply to this

33

WHAT A GREAT IDEA, AND HEALTHY TOO!!! GREAT ALTERNATIVE TO ALCOHOL.
Diane says – reply to this

34

Perez, are you dumb? Haven't you heard about sizzurp?? I'm pretty sure this is supposed to be like that codeine high. I don't think it's even relevent to pot or E.
TRACY says – reply to this

35

NEXT…LEGAL MARY JANE WOO!!
lefty says – reply to this

36

Dude! Where can I pick some up? Are dealers gonna be straight slingin it on the corner?
LEXTA$ says – reply to this

37

Come on every1.. it's supposed to simulate grape cough syrup. Sippin on that purple drank… I'm not even from the hood & I know that!
ashee says – reply to this

38

awww, you poor naive people….
this is CLEARLY made to look and taste like codine promithazene a purple mix that people from the south (H-town espically) drink to get messed up. have you people never heard of DJ screw???? he died from the stuff, what the hell are people promoting it for??
nikki says – reply to this

39

It's supposed to be like purple drank from the south…you know like lean! That's why its purple and that's why it makes you relaxed but it doesn't work, my boyfriend already drank some!
jonesjl9 says – reply to this

40

Melatonin is the hormone in the brain that is released in increments based on the amount of light the eye is receiving and it regulates biorhythms. i.e. it would cause our brain to think it's nighttime and it needs to go to sleep.
LEXTA$ says – reply to this

41

Come on every1.. it's supposed to simulate grape cough syrup. Sippin on that purple drank… I'm not even from the hood & I know that! Diane know's what's up.
Caroline says – reply to this

42

I don't think it's stupid.. at the end of a party when you're al hyped up you can tak ethis drink so when yo come home you can actually fall asleep and not be wide awake for a couple of houres
ariann says – reply to this

43

i like this idea. everyone needs to chill out anyway.
stef says – reply to this

44

Yeah, it most definitely must be for the hip hop community, because everyone knows the ROCKSTAR
STEF says – reply to this

45

Yeah, it most definitely must be for the hip hop community, because everyone knows the ROCKSTAR community would prefer COCAINE in a can…fucking crackheads….
ANDY626 says – reply to this

46

i cant wait for this!
Rollin says – reply to this

47

Rollin is doing X
9 inch says – reply to this

48

This is awesome. I love how the hip hop lifestyle is about relaxation and not working, and being lazy, and getting places late. I notice it's grape flavored. How odd… .colored folks are famous for liking grape beverages. The jokes write themselves
bingo says – reply to this

49

a "stress free state of mind"…..is that fancy talk for allways having a gun on u …and having your posse beat up everyone that looks at u
truthh says – reply to this

50

Perez you Fat Gay asshole- you just said the most prejudiced thing. That soda was obviously made for the hip hop community. I am so shocked and ashamed of you. That was wrong -and you call Rumer a Potatoehead
gei223 says – reply to this

51

Why don't they just it "fat ass in a can"?
Goodz says – reply to this

52

ITS LEGAL SIZZURP OR LEAN…ITS THE SHIT..HARD TO FIND …JUST BOUGHT A PALLET OF IT!
Nas says – reply to this

53

If you know anything about Texas rap, they talk about Purple Drank. It is liquor mixed with cough syrup that generally slowwws you down. Just listen to any Mike Jones, Paul Wall, or Bun B songs.
coocoo says – reply to this

54

melatonin gives me nightmares!
Leslie says – reply to this

55

You could not know less about drugs and their effects on brain chemistry. E is in no way shape or form similar to pot. And on a side note, you might want to think twice about bashing people who smoke pot when you drink alcohol - a far more harmful drug than pot. Tylenol and Aspirin are also more harmful than pot.

Please stop eating up American anti-drug propaganda.
I Love Lamp says – reply to this

56

I've tried that codeine cough syrup before. I was prescribed it though.. I took a double dose by accident and it messed me up. I could not keep my head up.
meghan says – reply to this

57

Valerin comes from africa, its a root that helps people sleep. meletonin encourages natural sleep habits.

DUH not that hard to look up.
claren says – reply to this

58

Hell, I'd drink it…
Sally says – reply to this

59

Re: April –
Are you damned retarded? Melatonin is not a vitamin, it's a hormone. And the stuff in turkey that makes you sleepy is tryptophan.
Maybe you should get a clue before you start shoving pills down your throat.
meltz9 says – reply to this

60

Hip hop is still popular? LOL
Claire says – reply to this

61

like codiene mixed drinks that rappers make. cough syrup+alcohol+other shit=purple drank… it's a whole huge movement.
CVD says – reply to this

62

That's been available at the corner store down the street for nearly a year now.

Old news once again!
tashi says – reply to this

63

Ha!! It's like a liquid joint!
RUU says – reply to this

64

I"D DRINK THAT
htx says – reply to this

65

This is definitely a REAL product, I know people who have bought it before. It isnt available everywhere though. And its definitely a take on "lean", aka promethazine codeine mixed w/ some any kind of soft drink, etc,

lean = what pimp c died of !!! and dj screw, big moe, etc.
Vanite says – reply to this

66

Just so ppl know, Drank is real, it was "conceived" in Houston by a soda rep, and they are test marketing it here ( I had heard about drank before it came out, a friend of mine used to work for that guy, I'm so connected>;). I have one in my fridge. It actually just makes you really sleepy, I have only had about a half a can and in about 30 minutes, I went to bed. I haven't tried combining it with illegal narcotics though.
Lara says – reply to this

67

Since WHEN has the hip-hop community been about remaining "calm" ???
They always seem pretty fucking hyped up to me.
Maybe this is the drink to bring you down after smoking crack and meth; two chemicals that seem to be the norm these days in the "gangsta" community.
And what's the sense of combining a herb such as valerian with vodka? Something that HELPS sleep, along with something that DISTURBS sleep?
Fuck. Human beings are becoming more stupid every day.
eddy says – reply to this

68

come down to houston, tx where it all started we'll show you what purple drank iz all bout!! :p
Cassie says – reply to this

69

I wonder if it's like the "Be Relaxed" flavored Vitaminwater–
x says – reply to this

70

the melatonin makes you sleepy
mer says – reply to this

71

Re: Graham – melatonin is a hormone found in animals and humans you idiot.
rach says – reply to this

72

did anyone else think about this being used to help come down off coke? jw lol.
JoAnn says – reply to this

73

I will try this for sure. I don't naturally need any uppers. I don't need the energy drinks. I am not on drugs! I normally have a lot of energy. I will definitely need to try this drink. I would probably drink it in the evenings when it's time to slow down.
MariO says – reply to this

74

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NIGZ says – reply to this

75

Great, it's for lazy niggs. It's purple because they love grape ne-hi and hi-c. Perefect for lounging around the house collecting welfare and smokin dope!
Toni says – reply to this

76

This is probably dangerous. It's a known fact that drinking while taking pills like valium can be deadly, and valerian root is the plant that valium is derived from. I drink valerian tea, but combining valerian with another chemical and vodka is not good advice and I'm sure some lazy ass person will drink this and decide lawsuits are better than welfare and sue this company.
lilb says – reply to this

77

WHO WOULD EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRR:::USE THAT ???????????????????????????????????????
Leela says – reply to this

78

This is more like Date Rape Drug in drink form. Melatonin and Valerian Root are known sleep inducers. Mixing with vodka would be a terrible idea.

In fact, this whole idea seems like an FDA nightmare!!
Simpli says – reply to this

79

hmm i dont really know about this…fuck it ill try it….i like that run down feeling :p
thirst says – reply to this

80

Some people get more easily horny when relaxed, maybe that's it?hehe
Christ says – reply to this

81

GRAPE FLAVOR…. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA…. HIP HOP COMMUNITY… HAHAHAHAHAHAHA… WHAT THE FUCK FLAVOR DID YOU THINK IT WOULD BE????? IT COULD ONLY BE FUNNIER IF IT WERE GRAPE KOOL-AID FLAVOR!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
htown says – reply to this

82

havent any of yall ever heard of lean? as in… syrup. come on– itsa purple can.
that'ss the hiphop reference. duh.
see: weezy, big moe, screw, 36mafia songs
liz says – reply to this

83

I'd rather drink this than one of those energy drinks!! the crap they put in energy drinks are soooo gross! gaurana is terrible for you! especially your heart.

if you need an energy boost have a cup of light coffee, it's better than the crap in monster drinks or whatever.
Umm says – reply to this

84

It doesn't sound like this was meant to be a 'legal high' type of product. Melatonin will not get you 'high.' Valerian root is related to catnip, and does have sedative properties, but also not productive of a 'high' like you'd expect with pot. All of the indgredients listed are simply natural sedatives you'd find at any supplement or health store. They help to stimulate and regulate the natural production of seratonin in the brain. None of them are related to THC (the active ingredient in pot) in any way.
murry says – reply to this

85

Anti-energy drink? You mean beer?
Staphn says – reply to this

86

fuck yeah baby …………..yeah suck that cock.oooooooooooohhh yeah come on baby.Drink my jizz yeah…..fuck yeah baby take that dick in your mouth.Yeah baby suck that shit real good.Fuck yeah baby let me spread my ass for you.Fuck yeah baby come on eat my asssss.Yeah baby rimm my asshole baby please.Fuck yeah baby Iam gonna cum right now.
french says – reply to this

87

that's lean dude
Ashley says – reply to this

88

Because black people really need something to make them even lazier….
nicole says – reply to this

89

ive drank it and bought thhat stuff in large quantaties… its good, it doesnt mess u up,but it is good with vodka and its great right before bed
Em says – reply to this

90

Dude, it's trying to be purple drank…with herbs instead of cough syrup and pain killers and whatnot.
fuckeryfresh says – reply to this

91

i think i'd like this stuff. i hate energy drinks. this might be nice to wind down after a stressful day at work, yunno?
Raven says – reply to this

92

Please make more of these in low carb and differant flavors such as banana or berry.
kate says – reply to this

93

If i wanna get sedated I just need to log into perezhilton.com and read the boring news he keeps posting!
elizab says – reply to this

94

i've had it before. it doesn't really do anything except make you a little sleepy. it tastes great, though!
the lo says – reply to this

95

Re: 9 inch –
hahahahaaaa!
NINEDO says – reply to this

96

Im a delivery driver for this drink and some guy in the state of IL by the name of Obama just ordered a truck full of this shit.
PURPLE says – reply to this

97

They left out the part about how "Drank" is (purposely!!!) much like a popular street concoction called "purple drank"…made from the mixing of Sprite and CODEINE cough syrup. For real! WHAT A SELLING POINT!
khhhhh says – reply to this

98

Valerian root makes burps takes like dirt.
Psycho says – reply to this

99

Diet Drank sounds right up my alley.
missze says – reply to this

100

oooh i can't wait to try it…..i suffer from extreme anxiety……might help me calm down some and i wont have to take my lorazepam…..