When she says "No" it really means "Shoot yourself"
Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & True
Sure it's a bummer to spend all night at a bar, get drunk and horny, and then come home to have your girlfriend thwart your advances…but it's no reason to shoot yourself in the arm!
Damn, motherfucker - just jerk off!
A Fort Meyers man was so upset when his girlfriend gave him the classic "I'm too tired" line that he shot himself. When his girlfriend wasn't impressed with his suave come-on, he proceeded to threaten her.
Ladies love that!
Determined to completely abandon his dignity, he then stumbled into the kitchen, where the oven jumped in front of him, causing him to trip and fall.
We'll bet he was really happy to wake up in jail with no recollection of how he obtained that bloody hole in his arm, not to mention the hangover from hell.
He was charged with threatening violence and firing a weapon in an occupied dwelling. He's being held on $100,000 bail.
Too bad he can't be charged with being a complete moron.
[Image via WENN.]
Oh he got fucked!
crayzee
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Perez your sister is so much funnier than you are!
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What a loser!!!
What a LOSER! He got what he deserved.
OMG - WHO CARES?
First, it's Fort MYERS. This is my hometown. But I DO NOT claim this idiot. Gotta love it when some ass puts your hometown on the map for something this retarded. Gee thanks man!
he was trying to shoot something else off, couldn't take the blue balls, go whack off to miley..duhhhhh
"Damn, motherfucker - just jerk off!"
Too fucking funny!!!!
More gossip about Melissa's date tonight?! Don't wipe that dirty face on the white furniture babe. That would piss anybody off!
ick.
that was me
last night
i was praying it wouldn't make
the big news papers….LIKE
PEREZ
HILTON
.COM
fuck
i am in this cow suit for
ever and ever, no?
i am going to bed
There's only one "e" in "Fort Myers."
wow its crazy but hey have u heard the new album from beto cueveas its called Miedo Escénico dont miss it its amazing it will make you feel like singing along so dont miss out you'll love it
I feel bad for the woman to had to witness this. I witnessed the same thing, and she is better without him. What a fuck up.
haha shooting himself in the arm and not getting any should be bad punishment enough. charges are getting stupider and stupider
I love you Perez. That was really funny.
Another low class black messing around with guns! Oh wait! That's nothing new!
If being a complete moron were a crime, we would have nothing but prisons in this country…
LMAO that is way too friggin hillarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This post is not "Perez" at all. You can SOOOO tell someone else wrote it. Perez, stop slacking off!
Was this story REALLY worth posting, Perez?? Considering that I am the 24th respondent…I think not.