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Headline Of The Week Weak

| Filed under: Headline of the Week


"Burglary victims wake to spice rub, sausage attack"

WTF???? CLICK HERE to read the article accompanying this headline.

[Image via WENN.]

Burglary victims wake to spice rub, sausage attack

A burglar who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed spices over the body of one man and then used an 8-inch sausage to whack the other man on the face and head as the two slept in their rooms, Fresno County sheriff's deputies said Saturday. The burglar then ran out of the house.

Lt. Ian Burrimond, describing the crime as one of the strangest he's ever heard of, said a suspect was found hiding in a nearby field a few minutes later and taken into custody on suspicion of residential robbery.

Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.

"It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID," Burrimond said.

Arrested was Antonio Vasquez, 22, of Fresno.

Burrimond said deputies headed to the victims' home in the 300 block of South Thompson Avenue near Kings Canyon Road outside of Sanger shortly after 8 a.m. Saturday regarding a burglary in progress.

The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying spices to one of them and striking the other with a sausage.

Both the spices and the sausage, Burrimond said, were obtained from the victims' kitchen.

After the man fled, the victims discovered the home had been ransacked and that some money was taken, Burrimond said.

Burrimond said the money was recovered, but that the piece of sausage used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog.

"That's right, the dog ate the weapon," Burrimond said.

"I tell you, this was one weird case."

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52 comments to “Headline Of The Week Weak”

  1. 1


  2. Amina says – reply to this


    wow this is so weird but yet funny

  3. olive says – reply to this



  4. 4

    what the hell

  5. 5

    Uh…………………this story is several weeks old, people.

  6. 6

    that's so… weird.

  7. 7


  8. 8

    WTF?! ROFL!! Wow - you hear the *wierdest* shit in the news these days……

  9. 9

    and why wazn't
    the zauzage put
    up someone
    butt? I like blow
    torchez up my
    hear me rROARRRRRRRRRR

  10. 10

    im gonna be a rockstar

  11. 11

    Re: Sugaroo – So what if it's old news? Obviously not everyone has heard about it

  12. 12

    lmfao the dog ate the weapon. you hate to be violated by a sausage like this but sometimes you gotta love crazy people.

  13. 13

    haha Amazing!!

  14. 14

    Re: Ms. McGillicutty – I can't stop laughing! You're right, crazy people rock! lol

  15. 15

    Headline of the week??????????????? This happened on 9/6/08 over a month ago!! A little behind on the times aren't we?

  16. 16

    This is such OLD news.

  17. 17

    Perez u gay fuck

  18. 18

    that is INSANE! and too funny.

  19. 19

    Some wacky week killer fucking with his mind.
    Dog made out like a bandit!

  20. 20

    weed killer I mean…ooopppsss

  21. 21

    DUDE, that was news over a MONTH AGO!!

  22. 22

    hahaha wtf

  23. 23

    Re: DaisyBaby

    Just another example of Perez trying to make it look like he has an exclusive on something when he doesn't. Maybe sometimes he does, but in cases like this……not.

  24. 24

    the dog ate the weapon lol rich

  25. 25

    This was news OVER A MONTH AGO.

  26. 26

    I'm not even sure what to think about this. How weird are people? Obviously very.

  27. 27

    This story is three weeks old, Perez. Seriously. pukingdog.com for the stuff perez will post in November

  28. 28

    that is one o the funniest things i ever heard

  29. 29

    Wow, this happened like, 2 or 3 weeks ago, Perez….Yawn…..

  30. 30

    That sounds hot.

  31. 31

    this is old news.

  32. 32

    Damn! That was weird!

  33. 33


  34. 34

    LOL, this story cracks me up! But it is old news, this came out a while ago….

  35. 35

    If BBD slapped him wit his sausage, that Mofo be Dead!

  36. 36

    LMAO!!! the sad part is… I Know this guy!!! : P

  37. 37

    Was the sausage attacker an ex lover of one or both of the men? I don't get it. This is such a random act of sausage abuse.

  38. 38

    Tell me please. Whatever is that tasty looking sausage dish in your picture? It makes me want to go make one and then break into some random peoples house and hit them with it over and over again.

  39. 39

    hahahahaha that is awesome………

    in the effing face with meat!

  40. 40

    I read this a few weeks ago and couldn't stop laughing. Fucking weirdness.

  41. 41

    As others have said, I definitely read about this at least a month ago. Sorry, Perez.

  42. 42

    jeeze perez. this is such an old ass story. I read this on MSNBC's "weird stories" section like, at LEAST 3-4 weeks ago.

  43. 43

    uhm so random was this guy mentally ok?

  44. 44

    Perez Keep up the good work. I like to read all about it. You go boy!

  45. Galen says – reply to this



    Dude has to be a Obama supporter!

  46. 46

    thats wierd.. i had to re-read it a few times to make sure i was understanding it correctly.. pretty silly..

  47. 47

    Desperate times means desperate measures LOL…Poor man couldn't afford a $ store toy gun…Moral of the article is…never leave your sausage out LOL

  48. 48

    Perez, do you have that recipe for that sausage house? I know someone who would like it for breakfast.

  49. 49

    i love the sausage

  50. 50

    Brings a whole new meaning to the word "assaulted".

  51. 51

    what the fuck!!!!! lmao

  52. 52

    This is the kind of shit perez does, gay sausage shit