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Direct To DVD - Again!

| Filed under: Jessica SimpsonFilm Flickers

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Despite her #1 opening in Russia, Jessica Simpson won't be given the chance to go for box office gold in the U.S.

According to reports, Simpson's latest filck, Major Movie Star, is being renamed for its U.S. release (to Private Valentine: Blonde & Dangerous) AND going straight to DVD!

Joe Simpson has yet to comment about this disastrous turn of events.

We don't think y'all would mind if Russia wanted to keep her there, right?

P.S. Goldie Hawn is NOT happy about the rename!

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34 comments to “Direct To DVD - Again!”



  1. 1

    Despite her #1 opening ,Tony Romo still prefer #'s 2 & 3.



  2. 2

    ALICEEEEEEEEE!!!!!



  3. 3

    I AM FUCKING COOL!



  4. 4

    hahaha



  5. 5

    Who's the tool who's gonna rent it?



  6. 6

    the ony reason anyone would rent that is the chance to see her big jigglies…Re: Booooooo !!!
    HAHAHAHA!!!!

    She probably likes the 3 so she doesn't have to worry about getting knocked up…



  7. 7

    Why or why won't this train wreck of a lip syncer and loser father from hell go away! His living off of her and her 15 minutes are up!



  8. 8

    CARIANNE IS A SKANKY SLUT! BEWARE OF HER STD PUNANNI!!!!



  9. 9

    They made her eyes blue in the picture!

  10. D-Bag says – reply to this


    10

    "A Private Affair" - FAIL. "Blonde Ambition" - FAIL. "Come on Over" - FAIL. "Major Movie Star" - FAIL. How many more times does this depserate cunt have to fail before Hollywood begins to take notice?

  11. Sammy says – reply to this


    11

    Perez has any of your "friends" done anything worth while? The exception is Katy Perry who may be a one hit wonder!! Right now you are probably more famous/popular then any of your loser friends!!!



  12. 12

    that pic is goin' on the back of the goat's head right now



  13. 13

    …what did they do to her face? She looks 'otherworldly' in the eye department, and I am being kind. Like a kind of hush, only a little bit louder. Huh?



  14. 14


  15. 15

    as long as she quits trying to sing she can live wherever



  16. 16

    loved how they re-colored her eyes to look bluer. actually, i don't. she looks like shit.



  17. 17

    Re: Cletus B. Fucktard – Well played, sir.



  18. 18

    I feel bad for her. She is already a has-been.



  19. 19

    she has BEEN a hasbeen. all of her movies suck, it's sad that she keeps trying.



  20. 20

    i'll watch it free online



  21. 21

    This has got to be the worst photoshop job ever! Made her look like a fug tranny. LoLarious!



  22. 22

    She needs to stop. This has got to be so embarrassing for her.



  23. 23

    just goes to show, that if you have a pushy, arogant father, you too can have 15 minutes of fame. Unfortunately, Jessica has had about 5 hours.



  24. 24

    Why does one of her boobs look way bigger than the other?



  25. 25

    I wanna squeeze her right boobie.
    She is a has-been. Was she ever a "been"
    Her sister was fug till she got her nose fixed.
    What a weird family. But Aslee & Pete are cute



  26. 26

    It doesn't matter that it went straight to DVD. Jessica the talentless airhead still made a lot of money making the movie.
    Hollywood is SHIT, fockers!



  27. 27

    Stick a scene in there with her and her sister and a cup and it will sell millions.



  28. 28

    This is also the second movie where they've recycled a picture of Chestica for the cover! That Blonde Ambition piece of crap used a picture from a "Public Affair" shoot and this is a pic from a magazine. They just photoshopped the dog tags on and changed the colour! Will she ever take the hint?

    Has Goldie actually said anything? I can't imagine she gives a shit.
    (And she had the audacity to take this thing to CANNES! AHAHAHHAAH!)



  29. 29

    Re: Sammy – He's FRIENDS with her?! That would explain why nothing ever happened when I tried to give him the scoop about her disgusting behavior to the waiter in a restaurant in Oklahoma during her "Reality" (Or what the hell ever it was called) tour. That story needed to be told, too. She is a rude piece of shit.



  30. 30

    Good night……. Get over it……. Your 15 minutes are gone…. take what you have left and get rid of your DAD!! Geez….. That really has to be depressing with everything she is trying to do is just going right down the shitter….



  31. 31

    Re: LettyB – I know she's a fucking rotten cuntface 2 cent whore.



  32. 32

    Butterface at best. When is Hollywood going to stop betting on this long shot?! She loses more money than she makes. It would be fun to see her go Britneybatshitcrazy for a while, dump her dad and…eh, who really cares after that.



  33. 33

    who ever buys this dvd is lame. Jessica is just plain gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



  34. 34

    Cover doesn't even look like her! And nothing will ever come close to the fabulous Private Benjaman … still love ya Goldie … lurve ur boyfriend too ;-)