One Night in Austin: The Rundown!!!!
It is the most buzzed about show at SXSW.
And it's OUR party!!!!
If you were lucky enough to get a credential to attend (emails went out already), here is the completely performance schedule with set times.
Dell presents "Perez Hilton's One Night in Austin"
Divas
7:00 pm - Doors open
7:30 - 7:50 Margaret Cho
8:00 - 8:20 Super Special Surprise Act
8:25 - 8:50 Ladyhawke
9:05 - 9:20 Thunderheist
9:35 - 9:55 Natalie Portman's Shaved Head
10:10 - 10:30 Solange
10:45 - 11:00 Lady Sovereign
11:15 - 11:40 Little Boots
11:55 - 12:05 Rye Rye
12:20 - 12:45 Ida Maria
01:00 - 01:25 Yelle
DJs
7:00- 10:00 Aaron LaCrate
10:00 - 12:30 JEPPE
12 30 - Late Late Kraak & Smaak
The guest list is closed. Email confirmations have been sent out already.
If you can’t make it to the party, get the exclusive link to watch video highlights by signing up at the Dell Lounge!
LeAnn Rimes' Husband "Dancer Dean" Is Outed As Being Gay…. By His Own Family!
Ickitt Was Pretty Darn Close
Perez, wake up!
Re: aj – Morning…….Dude or duddet
Re: Major Dude honks for harry – Hey dude…Doesn't Harry live in Texas????????
i am so hurt that i didn't get a credential.
LEAFS AND HABS TONIGHT……….
GO LEAFS GO!!!!!!!!!!
Re: Mistress Says Bring Back Harry – (#44) I'm at a loss as well, but that sounds good to me, HONK!!!
Re: justtfax – !!!!!
Re: Veuve Clicquot – Hey Hottie……How are My ( . ) ( . ) doing………???? Wink…….
Re: Long Dong Connery – yo!
Re: Jubilee sings *If U Seek Harry* – (#62) LMAO!!!
Yeah, that is quite a bunch !!! Ugh….
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Re: Long Dong Connery – Hello, Sir!
Re: aj – HONK!!!
Re: PixieDust and Beer – (#71) I think it's tonight, sister.
Re: aj – Re: pabst – Re: Mike_Rotch – Re: Hmm..Where is BBD & Harry Balsac?? – Re: 80s_Chick Dreams of Harry – Re: RedWingsFan – Re: Mistress Says Bring Back Harry – Re: Sensitivity – Re: Long Dong Connery – (AND WHOEVER I MISSED) WHAT IF WE ALL CHANGED OUR AVIS TO HARRY'S AVI? Psychological warfare! Bwa-ha-ha!!
Re: pabst – Cheers!!!!!!!!!
Re: justtfax – I think you're on to something there. HONK!
Re: BBBoricua – Hi Hottie………..
) wink
Any MOON updates………..
Re: Long Dong Connery –
Good morning, Mr. Connery
Re: Long Dong Connery – Here's mud in yer eye!!!
Re: Jubilee sings *If U Seek Harry* – Lets just pop a cap in Mario's lardass………….
Re: Jubilee sings *If U Seek Harry* – That would be HILARIOUS! HONK HONK HONK!
PEREZ IS ONE NIGHT IN AUSTINS BUTT!!!
Oh great a night of losers hosted by Pez, what fun!
Re: pabst – Thank you, thank you very much………burp!!!
A man told a co-worker that her hair smelled nice. The woman stormed into her superviser's office, wanting to file a sexual harassment suit. THe supervisor was puzzled and asked, "what's wrong with a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?" The woman replied, "He's a midget."
GOOd DAY My FELLOW HONK ers!!!!
Don't even expect an update this weekend because fat PERVez will be busy whoring out his little One Night in Austin concert of desperate fame whores and out hawking a book that nobody purchased and is out of print already. You can tell the concert will be boring as hell because he has people like Solange in it.
Re: lovernotahater – Nice Jack Russell…………..
Re: eurekagold – right right, hire people. you mean to tell me there is no celeb stuff going on when you are busy with your own crap perez? L to the AME!!!!!!!!!!!!
Re: Long Dong Connery – No updates, Sir! I hope SheriMoonbaby is OK and shows up soon!
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Re: Sensitivity – Hello! A Corona con Limon tonight sounds great!
Re: DIRTY LITTLE PIG FUCKER – HAAAAAAAAA
It’s Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. “No” says the neighbor. “The seat is empty.” “This is incredible,” said the man. “Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?” The neighbor says, “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven’t been to together since we got married.” “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible… But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?” The man shakes his head. “No,” he says. “They’re all at the funeral.”
Re: BBBoricua – yes cervessa Corona!!yayayaya! Honk!
One more…..Yo momma's so poor she cant even pay attention
Margret Cho, I'd rather watch Miley make chink eyes for 20 min. than this hack.
Re: Long Dong Connery – Good one, I heard one like that but the husband waved to the hearse as it passed the golf course!
so over all these austin posts…….where is the gossip??
A man says to his wife : what would you do if I won the lottery? The wife says why I'd take half and leave ya!!!! Ok says the man I just won $10 now here is your 5 now fu@k off!
Three guys are at a restaurant, all with their girlfriends.
The first guy, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the honey?…Honey."
Now, the second guy, copying the first, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the sugar?….Sugar."
So now, the third guy is under pressure. He has to come up with something good.
After, a minute of thinking he says to his girlfriend, "Pass me the pork…pig."
Re: Long Dong Connery – LOL!!HEEEEE!!That a goudin one!
My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that …
I like my women the same as I like my whiskey …
20 years old and mixed up with coke !
OMG Kraak & Smaak!!!!!!!!!! I wish I was going to be in Austin!!!!!!!!!!
Re: Sensitivity – 5$ now fuck off….HEEEEEEEEE
Latest on D l i s t e d : The name of MIA's baby is not Ickitt, it's Ikhyd.
Re: Veuve Clicquot – did you Lickhind!!
Perez is definitely not as entertaining as in the past. Sometimes half a day goes by without any updates.
D l i s t e d is so much more fun. Michael K is a genius. Wet-my-panties hilarious.
Re: Sensitivity – (#126) LMAO!!!
****** FILE UNDER OMFG *******
A British couple who say they can't work because of obesity-related health problems complained that the government checks they receive aren't enough to cover their living expenses. They aired their gripes in a story in the Telegraph.
Philip Chawner, 53, and his wife, Audrey, 57, haven't worked in 11 years. The government benefits they collect each year is equivalent to about $43,260 in American currency.
"What we get barely covers the bills and puts food on the table. It's not our fault we can't work. We deserve more," Philip Chawner told the newspaper.
The couple have two daughters — Emma, 19, and Samantha, 21. The combined weight of the four is 1,160 pounds.
Each family member consumes 3,000 calories a day, about 500 over the recommended maximum for men and 1,000 over the limit for women, the Telegraph says.
Audrey Chawner admitted the family's diet isn't the best. But healthy food is "too expensive," she said.
I feel the presence of Harry… Harry you ARE among the current posters… aren't you!?
PeeRez, you are such a weenie.
Re: BBBoricua – shitfukshit…..been way too long
Re: aj –
AJ excellent work on the multiple post early… EXCELLENT!
somewhere, Harry wipes away a tear… then refills that next BALSAC BALL GRAVY jar, full of his "goodness"
Re: Veuve Clicquot – (#148) and that's soooooo much better! UGH!!! honk
What is the differece between a cheerleader and a washing machine?? the washing machine doesn't follow you arounds after you dump a load in it!!
Re: Sensitivity – (#149) I just watched the Beavis and Butthead episode where BH was choking on a chicken nugget and Beavis called 911 and the operator was telling him to perform the heimlich (hindlick) maneuver. AHHHHHH, the goot ol' days.
Re: Veuve Clicquot – sorry that was did you say Lickhind!
Re: BBBoricua – Re: Jubilee sings *If U Seek Harry* – Re: Sensitivity – Re: Major Dude honks for harry – Re: aj – Re: Long Dong Connery – Re: pabst – this thread seems to be more buzzed about than that piece of shit party he's throwing.
Re: pabst – Ein Prosit!! Cold Pabst to ya!
Re: Veuve Clicquot –
#150 Agreed!!! d-l-i-s-t-e-d is great! I also love that Michael K has these hilarious photo contests and posts photos the readers send him, it's so outrageous!!! And he has those funny "It's peen time" posts
Oh Lady Sovereign?!? I thought she retired!! hahaha
Re: mamajud……honk – Hey, mamajud! Fukity fuk!
Remember poop? Her lingo was contageous…..
Whats the difference between Perezzz Hilton and a bowling ball ?
You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball !
Re: Mike_Rotch – if you're referring to One Hump in Austin… agreed.
Re: BBBoricua – Re: mamajud……honk –
Re: Mike_Rotch – I agree!
Re: Sensitivity – or on it!
DOUBLE HOOOONKS!!!
Re: Mike_Rotch – Damn right, YO!!! honk
2 cowboys talking about sex
1 cowboy says 'I like the rodeo position !'
'I haven't heard of that … ' says the other cowboy, 'what is it ?' 'Well get your girlfriend down on all fours and mount her from behind. Then reach round and cup both of her breasts and whisper 'these feel just like your sisters' and try and hold on for 8 seconds !'
Worst list of performers I have ever seen. lol. Pitiful.
Perez, if you're going to pimp out your things at least make sure they're good and worth while because this is far from it.
Drunk Robbery
A drunk had 14 shots of tequilla. After he decides to go home.
2 minutes later the drunk runs back in the bar. He asks the bartender for the phone, and the drunk calls 911, "Is there a problem, sir," asks the operator. "Yes," replies the drunk replies,"someone broke into my car, they stole the stearing wheel, the brake pedal, the accelerator and even the dashboard."
Minutes later police arrive on the scene.
The drunk goes up to the head officer and says, "nevermind, i got into the backseat by mistake
Re: Long Dong Connery – nice.
and oh yeah, fuck you mario boy humper jonas jizz guzzler…
Re: pabst – Hey, pabst! Cheers!
Re: mamajud……honk – Hi Mamajud!!HONK!!HONK!!
Re: Veuve Clicquot –
I like d*l*i*s*t*e*d. It's constantly updated. Damn, Perez blocks my comment each time I write the name of the site.
help me find my keys and we'll drive out of here…
answer to a joke about Mario's anus…
Re: Jubilee sings *If U Seek Harry* – #118 I'm down, I'll put my heels away in honor of our fallen comrade!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Re: Long Dong Connery – #135 And that is as it should be, game 7 and all!!!!
Is anyone else having problems signing up for this? I made a account but every time i go to the sign up thing on the page it takes me to a blank sign in page.
Is this stupid Austin thing finally over with?? Tired of hearing about it.
Boring…………………………….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………………….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………………..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz………………….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz………………………..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz……………………………………zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz……..
Re: Long Dong Connery – thank you for noticing "Lucy" we had to put her down last fall……..I miss her very much
Thanks for the tickets Mario, I appreciate it. I'll see you there.
WOooooooW, what a soooorry line-up you have there Perez. PROOF, that you're STILL only a blogger and a NObody!
WOW, THIS WAS ALOT MORE ENTERTAINING THEN WHAT'S HIS NAME. NOW, IF WE COULD JUST KEEP IT GOING AND KEEP HIM FROM MAKING MONEY, IT WOULD BE GREAT. oh, great line-up perez-just keep repeating it.
anyone live in the austin area that can pick up all the austin papers? see if perez is actually mentioned in the papers. I know he is going to tell us how much he and his divas rocked austin and his party was the best, hoping that most of us will not know that there were over 1800 acts this week on over 80 stages, but his party, it will be the best, because after all he is super mario, he has down on all fours investing the rest of the stages all week long.
I hope you sold a couple more, like 8, of your book/ pamphlet/ comics or ass wipe, or whatever in the name of Barack Obama. Ihear Amazon.Com is singing their praises to the number 1 best seller which wasn't you. Sorry, Poofty, the Bear
Perez, THANK YOU! I had a little too much fun last night!!Who knew an old Safeway could be so much fun. The Indigo Girls were awesome.
Indigo Girls? That was the secret surprise guest? Didn't they have a hit in the 80's?
Pathetic Perez you fat phuk
eeeeew lady sov?
why that skanky chav?