DJ AM's Memorial May Be Open To The Public Tonight
Filed under: Exclusives! > DJ A.M.
As we previously reported, a private memorial service for DJ AM will be held at the Hollywood Palladium on tonight at 7pm, but there may be a chance for fans who want to pay their respects to the beloved Adam Goldstein.
Organizers tell us they may open the event up to the public.
Those who want to attend can line up on Sunset Blvd beginning at 6pm and once all invited guests are accounted for, members of the public will be allowed in depending on the amount of space available.
We're sure he would have wanted that as we know how much he appreciated his fans.
[Image via WENN.]
Posted: September 3, 2009 at 3:30 pm
He sure didn't appreciate Perez at all.
In other words, that ugly-ass drummer from Blink 182 will be the only one there. Enough about this loser.
awesome…lets immortalize a drug addict. once again it shows how fucked up our society is.
Interesting. How will they distinguish fans from his friends in recovery? Whether they have an invite??? Those of us who knew Adam from the program are anonymous. They'd have no clue who knew him from meetings.
And I hear they're letting E! News & other media in, which goes completely against AA tradition#11: "Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films." Some 12-step format.
I'll be interested to see how this plays out when I get there.
Why is he getting so much media attention. He killed himself plain and simple. He didnt have to do drugs, he chose to do drugs. He's a loser and I do not think anyone should be reporting on him, or how said his buddy is that he is gone. If your depressed go to a shrink. He got what he deserved. Travis Barker is a jerk, and trash. He should be the next to go
you guys are all fucking idiots. i don't know why you gotta be so rude.
Re: buck – in our society I've come to find that if you don't like somebody when they're alive, you better idolize them when they're dead or you'll be attacked for being an inconsiderate asshole!! i agree w/ you, our society is completely fucked.
really? so what, pig vomit you are just a henger on, everyone from paris hilton to britney to lisa marie presley know this.
I feel really sorry for him and his friends and family as well. I bet he was a great guy. Poor Haley! =(
Its still unclear whether its a suicide. There is a lot of shame & guilt associated w/ relapse. He had relapsed a few days before & was planning to go to rehab the following day. Anyone who has done coke/crack enough knows the crash is HORRIBLE. Its common to take a bunch of downers to knock you out before you face the horrifying trauma of coming down. It remains to be seen if:
1. What milligrams the Oxys were. Many people use 80 mg Oxys. If Adam took eight to nine 10 mg Oxys, it's possible he was just trying to knock himself out before the crash in a last hurrah before rehab. Eight to nine 80mg Oxys=prob suicide.
2. If he was prescribed Oxys for his pain & had a tolerance to a certain amount, it would still make sense for him to take his normal dose, then take extra pills to counteract the crack & avoid the crash not thinking he'd die.
3. No note left or (as of yet) any cryptic last minute mixes on his laptop, nor left a will for his mother to whom he was very close.
4. Barricading of doors is also common when you're paranoid on crack.
So its possible it was a suicide, but also quite feasibly, he relapsed on crack in the days prior, knew he was going to rehab the next day so he went balls to the wall, tried to make himself pass out before the crash. Not uncommon, but very tragic. RIP Adam.
As a recovering addict, I know it would have looked like a suicide if anyone found me in my worst stages - using coke for days on end, then to pass out quickly I'd take - all at once - Sleep MD, Diphenhydramine in Tylenol PM & Benadryl, a MINIMUM of twelve 2mg Ativan, Vicodin, shots of vodka, Nyquil, Unisom, weed (which NEVER worked as a downer then, because it would make my mind start racing again), Ambien CR, Lunesta, and as many whippets as necessary - generally 24-36 canisters to cut off my oxygen so I could avoid the crash. If anyone found me, they'd be SURE it was a suicide. But that was never so. It was all to avoid the crash - & the guilt associated with using altogether. I am EXTREMELY lucky - I did this for years, with my tolerance for both coke & downers increasing steadily, as progression is the nature of this disease.
I am grateful to be clean today, and Adam was a big part of my recovery. I KNOW how an addict thinks - I am one. For those of you on here who think addiction is a choice, that's OK. I have learned acceptance is vital to my recovery. You have a right to think what you wish. I'm actually happy I'm an addict; I now have tools I need to learn how to cope with stress & live life on life's terms. If you think AA/NA "brainwash" you into believing addiction's a disease (despite massive amounts of proof within the medical field), well great. I sure needed my brain washed.
Re: buck – oh my god. Immortalize, really??? He was clean for like 10 years or something like that. Give the guy a break. He got depressed and relapsed. Do you know anything about recovery??? I feel so sorry that he let his addicting overpower him. RIP Adam.
I believe every person is an ingredient making up one big delicious meal. Some are sour like lemons, some are spicy, some sickeningly sweet. Yet together we're all necessary to complete the dish. Occasionally I'm reminded how grateful I am to be who I turned out to be. Right now is one of those times. And if you're reading this, I believe you're special, unique & necessary too, even if we're not alike.
RIP Adam. You made a HUGE difference in my life, for which I will be grateful, one day at a time. I hope what comes out of your passing is that at least 1 person recognizes their self-destructive path & chooses to get help, and that it serves to educate those who are uneducated about addiction to open their minds to understanding this life-threatening & VERIFIABLE disease. And no it is NOT a choice. How many of you made the best decisions at 14 years old? Use stems vastly from abusive homes to simple experimentation. Those not prone to addiction move on. Addicts don't - even "normies" can become physically & psychologically dependent on prescribed meds. Just know that when you're ready, there IS help; the hard part for an addict is being able to accept it when its given. Rest in peace, Adam.
Re: twi-addict – sorry can't agree with someone that purposely fucks up their life.
Oh please who gives a fuck, thousands of other people died just this hour. In the hole with his useless body
I'm glad Perez is posting respectful updates regarding this issue. It is so distressing to see some of the previous comments (Mr. "buck") that continue to demonize DJ AM even after his death. It's not about "immortalizing" a drug addict in my view. Hopefully it will be more about educating the public and those who do not understand addiction and the destruction and devastation it causes not only the user, but everybody in that user's life. Using that drug for DJ AM was but a symptom of a much bigger problem. Addicts and alcoholics are sick in mind, body, and spirit and use to ease the pain and torment of whatever is happening in their life. The drugs and alcohol work for a while…if they didn't people wouldn't use. You drink to feel prettier, stronger, more social, more outgoing ect… Problem is that temporary solution of using drugs and alcohol one day stops working and not only does it stop working (to the mind fuck of the individual) it eventually makes the problem worse. People end up alone in their home using where they used to use to go out and feel social. Addicition is a disease of Mind, Spirit, and Body and may all of you who feel alone in your rooms know that you are not alone. You are not unique. Walk into the rooms of AA or NA and listen.
Re: itsadisease – i'am more worried about the thousand of kids lining up on Sunset Blvd. that will in some way think drugs are cool and DJ's life was awesome. I would much rather everyone say what a waste of a live it was and don't put this guy on a pedistal. Maybe my thinking is fucked up but i'd rather not have anyone i know so respect to this guy.
2nd chance and he blew it! LOSER
Addicted to drugs or not he was still a person with family and friends that loved him….a little respect please people. Disrespecting a person who passed along with their loved ones, THAT shows how F-ed up out society is.
Give poor Adam a break if you don't know what its like to be addicted to anything. Look how they are immortalizing Michael Jackson 2 months after his death; he was a huge drug user. Adam sounds like he was a nice person who was trying to help others when he himself relapsed. Have some compassion.
It is incredibly sad that anyone would die alone like this. I agree with the comments that addiction is very sad, and it is difficult to overcome. I thank you for your comments because I believe now he did not committ suicide.
I certainly hope he did not.
I am not religious but I am praying for the young girl who has to deal with this sad turn of events. That being Hayley Wood
I think it was probably a very bad idea for him to go back into crack world, where it is everywhere.
God Bless you DJ and family and friends. I hope you are now in a better place
You guys are a bunch of dumb F@$#'s. Seriosly, Im sure all of you are just as big of peices of S@#%. You may not have the same addiction as he did and that is a mental health disorder. He was depressed. Everybody deals with their depression differently. This is no reason to disrespect his family. Shame on all of you. I hope when you all die people will do the same "oh well so and so deserved it because……" Im sure you either have drinking problems, some of you are I'm sure cheaters, backstabbers, what ever it is, you are no damn better. Go to hell all of you.
Oh and as for the one who is sitting there dissing the whole thing than saying you'll see when you get there. How dumb can you be???? You'r ass should be hung for your stupidness. *SLAP, SLAP* DUMB F@#%!!!!!!
Re: Bigpuppy1982 – YOU MY FRIEND ARE THE DUMBEST PEICE OF CRAP I HAVE EVER COME ACROSS. HOW DARE YOU SIT THERE AND PUT HIM DOWN WHEN YOU ARE NO DAMN BETTER. MAY GOD STRIKE YOU DOWN FOR BEING SUCH A HIPOCRITE.
Re: Edgenet – in the hole?? omg that is just so wrong….but i am still laughing! see ya in hell edgenet! i think we have just reserved our seats…..lmfao
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Hmm…
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…it it gonna be open casket where people can do some lines of his rotting junkie carcass?
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Some disc spinner toasts himself and so many of his fellow arrested developed generation get all sniffly tear-eyed over the twathead. Pathetic.
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The dumbass is in a plane crash but survives only to be too self-centered, selfish and stupid to appreciate his second chance so offs himself being an idiot druggie.
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Fuckin' twathead. His fans should just grind 'im up and smoke, toot and mainline the moronic gizmo.
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Re: SayItLikeISeeIt – Congratulations for getting off drugs, but you better put the coffee down boy because you're rambling about a mile a minute
RE: On_The_Short_Bus
Hahaha!! You're a trip! Haven't had caffeine or cigarettes since January 9th of this year!!! But you're right - I DID say a lot. It's just that I think a lot needed to be said!
High 5 though, that was pretty funny! =•)
Re: buck –
Man, it's not about martydom for these celebs that overdose. You see people die alone from this disease of addiction. When we hear these stories it’s usually something like “kurt cobain, elvis, heath, chris Farley, found dead alone in an apartment or hotel room”. This disease kills because people all the time think they should be able to stop using on their own. They try over and over and can’t stop. They think they are weak, pathetic, or just terrified that they can’t stop on their own so they say well “just one more time and I’ll stop tomorrow”. Then tomorrow comes and they do it all over again because they can’t stop and they don’t understand why they can’t. Nobody chooses to become an addict. Believe me it is a lonely desperate place being addicted. You ask how does this happen? Well, most of us try our first drink at age 13 or so. Then in high school we begin drinking more on weekends with friends so we fit in or so we can relax or so we can get the buzz on to get the balls to talk to that hot girl. You act goofy, the fact that you are not supposed to be drinking makes it even more fun on Sat night in high school. Then you go to college if you have half a brain. In college you drink more…(continued)
Re: buck – Well, most of us try our first drink at age 13 or so. Then in high school we begin drinking more on weekends with friends so we fit in or so we can relax or so we can get the buzz on to get the balls to talk to that hot girl. You act goofy, the fact that you are not supposed to be drinking makes it even more fun on Sat night in high school. Then you go to college if you have half a brain. In college you drink more. Drink for football games, drink to get the courage to hit on that hot guy or girl, drink as a right of passage. Maybe smoke a few joints, some bong hits or maybe you already started that in high school. I’m generalizing here. Nobody at this point ever thinks he or she will ever have a problem. Then maybe you try cocaine one night and it’s fun. Gives you more balls to hit on the hot girl. You are able to stay up later, drink more, get more crazy, break rules…(con't)
Re: buck – You do some coke now on weekends if it’s at a party. Again nobody thinks he is going to get addicted. Then you have partied all weekend and Monday rolls around, you are out of college and working and fuck Monday is hard to get through but when you get home from work you pop open a beer to relax and watch garbage on TV. Then it’s Thursday which is close to the weekend, time to start the party. We used to say weekends were for the amateurs. So as you are driving home from work on Thursday you can’t get home fast enough to shower and meet friends at the bar to get the drink on. Maybe somebody has some cocaine on Thursday night so you do a bump or 2 with your drinks stay up too late and sleep 4 hours before getting to work on Friday. Friday sucks b/c you are hung over and you are just watching the clock waiting for 5:00 so you can go home shower and go out and get the cocktails/beers to feel better. This goes on for a year or 2 and before you know it you can’t wait until work is over everyday so that you can get home to open that bottle of wine. Now you are having a couple of glasses of wine everynight with dinner to “unwind”.
Re: buck – Now you are an alcoholic. Yup you are. The wine industry would like you to think otherwise but if you drink everyday, have trouble not drinking, wake up hung over, have ever had DUI’s, have ever used drugs or alcohol to improve your mood or functioning you are either an alcoholic or on your way to becoming one. You see alcohol is usually a much slower decline. People can be alcoholics for years before their drinking really starts to increase and they are having a bottle or 2 themselves everynight. Alcoholics usually show up in AA in their 40’s and 50’s. Drugs are the fast track to AA/NA. They are much more addictive, people become totally physically and psychologically dependent on them much quicker and they take you down much faster and much harder. We call it the fast track to AA/NA. But you see, it’s the special people that actually make it into recovery. It’s those people that are sick of living the way they are living realize that as much as they want to stop, as much as they say “last time tonight, tomorrow I won’t do it again” only to of course do it again because THEY CAN’T STOP ON THEIR OWN and admit that they can’t stop that swallow their ego, their shame, their guilt and ask for help.
Re: buck – Just ask for help. Just walk into the room of AA/NA b/c you are not alone. You are not unique. And if you have tried and failed and tried and failed to stop YOU ARE NOT ALONE, YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE, YOU SIMPLY HAVE A MEDICALLY RECOGNIZED DISEASE CALLED ADDICTION. You will learn you do not have to feel shame about this, guilt about this, you can rebuild your life, and best of all are you ready: THE GREATEST NEWS IS THAT THERE IS A SOLUTION! YOU CAN GET WELL AND LIVE THE LIFE YOU HAVE IMAGINED AND LIVE A LIFE BETTER THAN YOU HAVE IMAGINED. Pain and despair is the greatest impetus for change. When you know that pain and that despair, when you get to the other side you will have an appreciation for life few will ever know because you made it through. You only made it through though because you will have admitted to yourself that you can’t stop and that is ok. It is ok to say “I don’t know why but I can’t stop”. When you walk into the rooms of AA/NA for the first time scared, alone, desperate every single person in that room has been exactly where you are at that moment and knows exactly how you feel at that moment and when you raise your hand to say it is your first time at a meeting you will feel the solution to your dilemma.
You will hear them tell their stories which is just like your story, the story that you felt nobody else had ever lived. People will help you. Let them. They will not judge you, they will not care if you have money, if you have a job, what your last name is, they will show you how they started like you and now live a life free of drugs and alcohol. This is what I hope DJ Adam does for people. You do not have to die alone in a room. Just save your life by admitting that you need help. It is ok to need help. I know you feel you shouldn’t need to need help. But just let go. Let go of that idea that you are a failure. I was the last person who ever thought I would become an addict. I have a very high level of education (as high as it goes), I am a professional, and I was taught that I could do anything if I put my mind to it. That was true until addiction kicked my ass and the more I tried myself to stop through therapists, reading, religion (although I am so anti-establishment), it was only until for me it was either death or swallow my pride and walk into the room of AA which I imagined was a room full of old dudes with paper bags covering their beer cans. I was wrong and the program not only saved my life but enabled me to live my life without all the shit I carried around b/c remember the using is just a symptom of a bigger problem.
I pray that this whole tragedy helps one person. As a person in recovery I just want you to know you are not alone. Any questions about addiction, alcoholism, or if you are struggling and need help or just want to write an email feel free to write me an email. I can help you find local AA, NA, or other recovery programs in your area. I respect confidentiality and request that you only use your first name or if you want you can make up a name. Just don't suffer alone. my email itsadisease@hotmail.com. Don't suffer alone. Help is out there. Just admit it, let go of your old ideas, and be open to the idea that you can recover. One day at a time.
Re: SayItLikeISeeIt – i agree with everything u jus said…ive been there too
You're all responding very immaturely. Sure, if it was an intentional, overdose, it was very foolish of him. Even though he'd been sober for awhile, it's a lot to deal with the trauma of being in such a huge plane crash like the one him and Travis were in. Also, to all of you saying "Travis is next" seriously, shut up. That's pretty much the worst thing you could say in this situation. I think we should all send him our condolences considering him and AM were the only two who survived the crash among a few of their other friends who lost their lives. GROW UP PEOPLE.
Rest in peace, Adam
I am sorry that this guy died so young, from what appears to be suicide. But will someone please explain why he was such a celebrity? So he spun records at parties - why is that such a big deal? Same with Sam Ronson - I don't get it. I have an iPod and some great playlists which are a big hit at parties. Why am I not famous?
RE: Andriiiiia - Thank you. It's good to feel like there are others out there who have been there & understand.
RE: Itsadisease - You couldn't have said it any better. People like you are the reason I'm clean today. Adam's passing may not be in vain if so much as 1 person decides they need help & actually seeks it.
Just came back from the memorial - touching, heartfelt, sobering & funny all at the same time. Everyone in that room had a common denominator: Adam. In the spirit of 12-step, I won't divulge anything that was said, or who said what, but one thing that I already knew was confirmed - Adam never survived that plane crash.
Survivor's guilt, dependence on pain & anti-anxiety meds - when you've been completely clean & sober for years & then have to take pills, where do you draw the line? You take as prescribed, or "as needed" but one day you're in more pain, you take more - "as needed". Your brain is teetering on the edge - have I relapsed? Once you let your mind - the addict mind - convince yourself that you've already relapsed, it's a hop, skip & a jump right back into full-blown addiction. After all, you feel like you already lost your clean time, like you're fooling the world, and inside you are riddled with guilt about this. Adam didn't want to die. He just didn't know how to face the world again - he was a pillar of recovery & was scared to admit he was fallible. For the people saying he survived the crash, he had a second chance at life & shouldn't have squandered it - understand that, mentally, Adam never survived that crash. He was suffering so much. I have a better understanding now, and to those who spoke tonight, thank you. You reinforced my own recovery, and for that I am sincerely grateful.
This has happened to too many of people I know: death or near death.It's getting pretty obvious, drugs aren't as glam as they are often portrayed.RIP DJ AM.Sorry.
RE:SayItLikeISeeIt….very sweet and passionate. Keep up the good work..Unity, Service Recovery baby…For all our friends of Bill's out there this has been a very difficult time…Dont think for a second Michael was not one of us His money and access killed him..
To all the dope fiends on this site always remember "some of us have to die in order for others to recover". But for the Grace of God, there go I. RIP Adam.
um yeah so the last couple of comments….i disagree and since you guys fee liike its totally cool tobe honest and voice your oppinions i feel like i should be able to do the same. FUCK YOU that guy was an amazing dj and did want to help other people.its a shame what happend but its life.shit happens AND no matter what or how u die from never takes away from who you were and the impact he left on alot of peoples lifes.if you guys didnt like the guy keep that shit to your self. if it was your family member andu logged on just to see whatwas going on and u read this…damn. heartless fucks