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Tom And Katie Break It Down, We Break Down Laughing

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How HOrrific!

These two must really be desperate for attention work!

The lifeless shell of Katie Holmes put up her best jazz hands last night and - we're using this term loosely - 'performed' Whatever Lola Wants at the A Fine Romance Benefit for The Motion Picture and Television Fund.

And look who showed up to prance around the stage with her! Her captor hubby, Tom Cruise!

Check out the HIGHlarious performance above!

Katie, you need to STOP this whole singing thing ASAP! We don't care how good Lord Xenu says you are, bb!

That being said, you and Tommy TOTALLY need to collaborate on more projects together! This mess was almost as good as when Bennifer did Gigli!

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208 comments to “Tom And Katie Break It Down, We Break Down Laughing”

More comments: « 1 [2] 3 »

  1. RPORC says – reply to this


    101

    Creepy and eeeewwwww!



  2. 102

    Certain antidepressants can make people (like Katie) behave this way..



  3. 103

    You are a fat fuck for criticizing them. The whole skit is for a fundraiser benefit; it is a good cause. You are so shiteous to the Cruises. Leave them the fuck alone.



  4. 104

    I liked it!!!! I am not a fan of Katie, but I think she did very well.



  5. 105

    Honestly, she really didn't do half bad. Of course not broadway quality, but no, my ears didn't bleed. Tom Cruise was the one who blew it, though. He was sitting there, dead faced, probably with a half boner. Kudos to Katie in my opinion, cut her some slack. She did it for a benefit concert, it's not her whole career. :P



  6. 106

    I think it was good or at least Katie was. She has some nice song and dance skills-and great legs!!



  7. 107

    It was pretty good



  8. 108

    WUT DA HAIL WUZ DAT ?



  9. 109

    Can't afford singing and dance lessons?



  10. 110

    Re: blugre – Dude, you don't know where the fuck it's been!



  11. 111

    she really needs to do something with that face of hers



  12. 112

    How much time does Katie have left on her marriage contract?



  13. 113

    Not bad and it was for charity! At least it was live. Come on give them a break.



  14. 114

    I can't stop laughing . . . the part where Katie throws the little man down and he bobs up and down with no control!!!! LOL LOL over and over!!!!



  15. 115

    Wow hosiery does wonders with tree-trunk legs..
    Why does Tom look extra short?



  16. 116

    ew



  17. 117

    It was for a benefit! The only thing horrific is the way the press is really trying to bring these two down while glorifying other stars who cheat on their wives. Tom and Katie Holmes are certainly not desperate for work. That is as absurd as the idiotic notion that Tom Cruise and Steven Spielberg sat in a room while doing War Of The Worlds and said hey how can we drum up publicity for our film? I know why don't you date that girl from Dawson's Creek! It didn't happen. The world was in love with Tom Cruise for twenty years. He met Katie Holmes and they fell in love. Leave it alone.



  18. 118

    She wasn't that bad. I would even go as far as saying she was pretty good. And it was cute.



  19. 119

    It was good… asshat.



  20. 120

    Ouch.



  21. 121

    ok, that really wasn't so bad. i think Katie looks really good and the dancing and singing was kind of cute



  22. 122

    I THINK TOM IS SWEET AND I THINK HE WENT OUT OF HIS WAY TO SUPPORT HIS WIFE EVEN THOUGH SHE HAS THICK CALVES AND FAT KNEES. I FOUND MYSELF CRINGING … I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE WATCHING HER ..SHE IS CLUNKY.



  23. 123

    Although I hate the notion of such a such a cultist religion as Scientology (but then again, all religions are pretty much cults), I'm not going to let it cloud a performance. I think Katie did damn well. I didn't even know she could sing. And she can. Her dancing was great. The timing was on point. Well done!!



  24. 124

    Yeah that is pretty bad. I know I can't sing so I don't I would expect the same from a "professional"



  25. 125

    these two have zero chemistry. On top of that, Katie is completely unsexy and she can't sing!!!And Tom can't seem to act!



  26. 126

    It was AWFUL I guess they needed to do more E meter sessions with Lord Xenu before going on! She looked like she was enjoying herself pushing him down, maybe venting her frustrations a bit on the completely controlling husband. Crazy Scientologists! Maybe the aliens thetans will take them back on the mother ship! Do you think they enjoy V?

  27. StayC says – reply to this


    127

    barf… I'd be embarrassed to be her spouse… but I'd also be embarrassed to be tom cruise



  28. 128

    awe they are cute quit hating



  29. 129

    d bags it was for charity. have some class u jealous freaks id like to see u guys sing



  30. 130

    Re: Malfinnien – Haha.. Mine as well.
    First off, that is whining, not singing.
    And secondly, I can't believe he even let her do this.
    And the dancing!?!? Oh my…



  31. 131

    not bad



  32. 132

    *
    *
    Scientology kills!
    *
    *
    Remember Lisa McPherson
    *
    *



  33. 133

    they should be ashamed of themselves, rather than sexy she looks vulgar, but… aaaah hahahahahhahahahahahahahahaa



  34. 134


    sorry Mario…

    her voice is decent, was her performance

    you need to pull your ugly piggy-face outta Bieber's bunghole

  35. Scar says – reply to this


    135

    Re: LiteDaze – by that logic, you should be in love with every movie you see if you don't know the first thing on making one, enjoy every song you hear if you cannot sing at all yourself, love every piece of clothing if you can't sew that shit up worth your life and so on
    what a stupid little comment you just made



  36. 136

    it wasn't half bad asshole



  37. 137

    Before you actually had to have a good voice and good acting before they let you on the stage. :S



  38. 138

    i liked her singing but please what was tom doing there? he looked like he had never acted a day in his life. so pathetic.



  39. 139

    man, that's bad.

  40. @v@ says – reply to this


    140

    Ripping a free performance for charity is really bad form. I thought it was amusing, and intended to be spoofy. Kudos and bouquets to anyone who gives freely of their time and efforts to bring funds to a needed and good cause.
    (and those are really good, functional runner's legs.)



  41. 141

    Is she trying to get cast in a musical??



  42. 142

    I thought she was good, if you have ever seen the movie the woman sings in that kind of weird voice, Katie is better than a lot of other stars who try to sing.



  43. 143

    Ouch, how can a woman not feel embarrassed for her? I really, really do. This is something you do in your living room with your husband alone cause you cannot dance to save your life and you can't sing well either, like most of us.
    Do she think she's Nicole Kidman or something??



  44. 144

    it was for a benafit and it was for fun who cares if it was good or bad, it put a smile on everyones face thats for sure



  45. 145

    She could use a better singing coach, but considering she is neither a noted singer or a dancer it really wasn't that bad. Just because they're Scientologists and you hate them doesn't mean everything they do sucks. It was for charity. What charitable things have you done lately lardass?



  46. 146

    That was embarrassing to watch. So bad!!



  47. 147

    bravo



  48. 148

    bravo i liked it….



  49. 149

    like it as well



  50. 150

    I thought the "dancing" was AWFUL, but I actually kind of like her voice and I think that is a hard song for anyone to sing. I have always liked her voice, ever since hearing her perform on Dawson's Creek many, many years ago (I was a teen…but STILL…I probably shouldn't admit I watching that show LOL). I am really surprised by just how bad her dancing is though, that was really, truly AWFUL.



  51. 151

    If you spent less time self-promoting and more time getting a friggin clue, you would understand that Katie is great here and Tom is a big closeted piece of wet cardboard. How does an idiot like Perez get to be so successful? WHAT A WORLD! Keep sucking the right dicks honey



  52. 152

    Blimey, I wish I could sing and dance like that.

    They were doing it for a good cause so shame on you.



  53. 153

    Jesus, it was cute. Stop hating.



  54. 154

    Sorry Perez but I thought it was fun. Considering she was singing then they did good. I think their relationship works for them. If it's that bad then why bother posting it? I'd like to see your ass get out there and do that.



  55. 155

    She did an awesome job. You truly have no idea what you are talking about … so sad that you want to judge AI.



  56. 156

    All the comments about this not being that bad make me smile. It's like a parent who pins their 3-year olds drawing to the fridge and gives them encouraging words about their "art". The difference is that these are not two 3-year old kids. I am pretty sure they like to think they are "professional" actors. This performance, regardless of the charitable nobility behind it, sucked ass. If you don't recognize this as an attempt on Katie's part to USE the charitable event to take one step closer to getting a Broadway role then you're blind. Their are hundreds of people with considerable more talent than her who will lose out on a role because Mrs Tom Cruise has delusions of Broadway Grandeur.



  57. 157

    could u do it better, perez, or any of u haters out there? I think they did a nice job and that it was cute… kudos to them both for having the cojones to do it!



  58. 158

    god she is such a beard.



  59. 159

    not very good

  60. kis95 says – reply to this


    160

    They're still better than Kate Gosselin.



  61. 161

    Wow..that was unconfortable to watch. She looks very akward trying to dance..and he's just boring.



  62. 162

    It was CUTE and for CHARITY!!! I think Katie did a great job. It was suppose to be funny. Where is your fun spirit and sense of humor?? I am not a scientolgist but I JUDGE NO ONE FOR THEIR RELIGION. Why do you single their faith out and constantly knock them for it???



  63. 163

    She hit the notes… but something about the way her singing voice sounds… idk it just isn't very pretty. The dance was a little stiff too, but not really shiteous as you say… she did alright.



  64. 164

    She started out a little rough, but I think Katie did a good job! Tom.. well, he was a good sport.



  65. 165

    Awful singing:( That wouldn't pass the first round of American Idol.



  66. 166

    I actually enjoyed it. However, I'm not a bitch that has to put down everyone except GaGa. Good for them for having fun and doing it for a good cause.



  67. 167

    while katie doesn't do "sexy" well it wasn't horrible and apparently the audience didn't think it was bad considering the response………
    *
    mario's opinion on everything is simply biased………



  68. 168

    Wow….she should be REALLY embarrassed. That was beyond awful. Not even high school caliber. Way to go Tom….make it an even bigger joke. Sad to see Holmes doing this crap….she once had a really promising career as an Indy actor.



  69. 169

    So next year we see Perez doing this song ?
    Now that would be lolarious.
    Her voice sounds great, this is one of the hardest songs to sing.
    The dancing, hmmm not so happy with that, but hey she's no dancer so it was ok.
    Really wanna see you do this Perez so we can brand you.



  70. 170

    is it just me….or did she seems to enjoy hitting and pushing tommy?



  71. 171

    Oh shut up Perez!! She did a good job, and it was great that Tom accompanied her. Good for them!



  72. 172

    Re: blsdjan – scientology is not a religion.



  73. 173

    That was god awful. I was embarrassed for them just watching and I couldn't even watch through to the very end. Someone said she sounded like a broadway singer? Are you kidding me?! This was horrific. For charity or not.. it was awkward and not enjoyable at all to watch.



  74. 174

    Wow! I had no idea Katie Holmes could sing like that! I think she sounds good and she gave a cute performance. I like them as a couple, I think they are good for each other.



  75. 175

    Perez, give it a REST!!! Just because you aren't a fan of Scientology, or their relationship or anything else to do with Katie or Tom, doesn't mean you have to hate on their every move.

    I'm not a fan of the religion…I think Tom is a weirdo…but Katie is a beautiful young woman, their daughter is a total cutie and Katie is very talented. I thought she did a great job. Tom still creeped me out but what are ya gonna do? haha…but in all seriousness, Perez, shut up about it already. I read your site ALL the time but your hatred for certain people causes it to cloud your judgment and you end up looking plain STUPID!



  76. 176

    that is the most normal i have ever seen them, they look happy and they're having fun. and for a good cause!! you worship angelina jolie and she's skanky and scary. for goodness sake, give them credit when they deserve it.



  77. 177

    I thought it was cute. Obviously she isn't a singer - she is an actress, and it was for a good cause. It took guts to do what she did!



  78. 178

    THAT WAS PAINFUL TO WATCH.. I WATCHED PROBABLY THE FIRST 20 SECONDS..

  79. Kerrs says – reply to this


    179

    i thought it was fun !!! really cute to see them like that



  80. 180

    It was for charity. She put herself out there. This was actually cute, bold and daring of her. Kudos to you Katie. Go suck balls Perez!



  81. 181

    wow this is so weird and awkward… gotta love tomkat!



  82. 182

    Re: crazycatlady18 – Hilarious. LMAO!



  83. 183

    I think it's great that Tom and Katie did this. It's fun! It is what it is. They weren't pretending to be Fred and Ginger; they were just being good eggs for charity. Everyone relax!



  84. 184

    An okay performance by Katie, Tom just walked around like the soul-less zombie that he seems to be; suppressing his true sexuality to his public and perhaps to Katie as well. Crazy Tom, run Katie before it's too late. Perhaps it is already too late. Looking forward to dinner theater in the decades to come?



  85. 185

    It was even bad. You're just a hater. Wonder why no one visits your site anymore.



  86. 186

    can you spell bad? omg. When did Katie take singing lessons? She sounds so funny!



  87. 187

    KATI'S VOICE IS FREAKIN ANNOYING. THAT DAWSON'S CREEK NASAL THING IS AS A BAD AS CHERYL COLE TALKING WITH HER ANNOYING GEORDIE ACCENT. SAME SHIT.



  88. 188

    Well.. we learned something today. You know you are washed up whe you need your wife to sing to something really pointless with you onstage.



  89. 189

    I don't think that was as bad as people are saying…they just don't like Tom and Katie. Her singing was MUCH better than I expected from the comments. That performance had better vocals and dancing than you'd get from Britney Spears!



  90. 190

    Well it takes alot to get up and perform something like that but even if it was an amazing performance you would still find something to make fun of her about. Lets see your fat ass try something like that I bet it wouldnt be half as good!!



  91. 191

    my eyeballs are bleeding worse than my ears. BARF!



  92. 192

    It's for CHARITY dumbasses. They're not trying to win DWTS, You can shut your complaining pie holes anytime would be good.



  93. 193

    CHEESY AS HELL! Embarrasing.

    Katie doing this shiz is just sad and she sucks as a singer and dancer. Cruise has ruined her!



  94. 194

    I thought that was cute! It was just a charity thing, not a real Broadway performance, and I think it's really nice how he supports her and plays along. Granted, the religion stuff is weird, but otherwise it seems like they have a nice marriage.



  95. 195

    aw I thought it was cute, and jeez it was for charity! Why the hate?



  96. 196

    Wow, if that's live, she's really great!



  97. 197

    bahahaha



  98. 198

    Wow - that was terrible. And I went into it with an open mind. Hard to watch.



  99. 199

    The performance was hideous. She needs voice lessons if she's going to try this stuff. She's also lacking sex appeal. Which is strange. Before Tom, she had potential. Now, she's just a bit of royal celebrity being indulged. And, Tom's attitude cements that.



  100. 200

    all the money in the world can't buy you actual talent.

More comments: « 1 [2] 3 »