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Guess Who's Getting All Fast And Furious?!

| Filed under: Film FlickersVin Diesel


Well, this mess of a movie just got that much more ridiculous.

We announced a few months back that there was a fifth Fast and Furious movie in the works. It's called Fast 5 in real life, but we prefer 5 Fast 5 Furious!

Paul Walker and Vin Diesel have reportedly already signed on, and today there's news of a newbie joining their ranks: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson!


Not that we're going to see this garbage, but don't you think he and Vinny are going to be a little difficult to tell apart with all of the .3 second cuts, muscles, and explosions? Not that these guys have ever been masters at writing comprehensible stories, but GEESH.

How are we supposed to distinguish the characters now? We were relying on physical appearance to do that!

Whatevs, we will still applaud The Rock for signing on! He obviously knows how much effing money these movies make!

He'll be able to buy the deluxe-sized jacuzzi now! Congrats, bb!

[Image via WENN.]

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32 comments to “Guess Who's Getting All Fast And Furious?!”

  1. 1

    Make sure he takes his shirt off!!

  2. 2

    I LOVE THE ROCK! He is kickass!

  3. 3

    The title makes it appear like a Gay Porn Blockbuster with no condoms in sight !!

  4. 4


  5. 5

    Yesssss. love the rock.
    and perez, you know damn well you'll see the movie..and you know you'll post all the reviews..so stop talking shit. you support everything you talk trash about.

  6. 6

    i'm going to pretend its the estrogen in your veins that make you hate fast n the furious :)

  7. 7

    Ya gotta love it, am oozing testosterone love fest!

  8. 8

    There will be a Fast and Furious 10.

  9. 9

    You won't be able to tell the difference? The Rock is the hot one-but I also think that Vin is fairly short but the Rock is a huge,tall guy!

  10. 10

    Who cares about The Rock or Vin…just give me Paul Walker…mmmmm.

  11. 11

    Re: John Cusack fan – He'd have to bottom in the flick, considering Diesel and Rock have the hard-core fucking-machine 'pseudonyms' going for them !!

  12. 12

    Cool. I've wanted to see VD and DJ together in a movie.

  13. 13

    I love Dwayne Johnson. He is actually not a bad actor. I wish he would stop doing the family movies though, he needs to get back to the more dramatic/action roles.

  14. 14

    The Rock is the hottest guy in the world! Gorgeous, built, funny and that smile!!! OMG…. he rocks!

  15. 15

    Oh let me guess you are going to watch Miley Cyrus be a good role model for teenage girls instead?

  16. 16

    the Rock and Vin in tanks and Paul in jeans and a blue work shirt….COUNT ME IN … really the story can be utter shit if it has cool cars a good soundtrack and all three in various stages of sweaty greasy undressed-ness it is worth the admission price

  17. 17

    That's great, Dwayne Johnson is awesome.

  18. 18

    Huh? How would you not be able to tell the 2 apart? WTF??? I sure as hell know I'll be seeing this movie…Paul Walker is HOT!

  19. 19

    nope pual walker stares at the camera to much

  20. 20

    Ok so first you run this down like the 4th one but yet you are saying The Rock knows how much effing money these make. Sorry but you just contradicted your words. Someone is jealous I think. I'm the sure the ladies are more than happy to add extra sexy beef to the movie. Just glad your ugly ass aint in it.

  21. 21

    Perez you're starting to act like you have ebert and roeper credibility. Seriously, I know being Cuban makes you act like a know-it-all but please.. stop acting like you're not just Perez Hilton.

  22. 22

    OMG!! Vvvvvv excited for this!
    Vin and The Rock? Together? Be still my beating heart! I shall expect lots of gratuitous shirt removal…Oh, and maybe Paul Walker could smolder in the background :-)

  23. 23

    I LOVE THE ROCK,… I would do things to him.. WOW WOW WOW.. LOVES HIM.

  24. crap! says – reply to this


    they need to get the guy from tokyo drift back! he's sexy and he has a hot accent!

  25. 25

    Yeah, because we desperately need another one of this crappy movie.

  26. 26

    All I want for Xmas is a naked Paul Walker handcuffed to my bed

  27. 27

    Vin Diesel AND the Rock…..I can't wait to see this movie!!!! Hot!!!

  28. 28

    another hasbeen

  29. 29

    the rock is GORGEOUS. all his parts better be shirtless!

    i thought he was going to stick with family movies, he's got great comedic timing and seeing him be all big and burly with little kids is just too cute for words. yeh, tooth fairy is awful, but i gotta give the guy a hand for playing to his comedy strengths.

  30. 30

    i love the rock great choice cant wait

  31. 31

    I LOVED the last installment. Vin & Paul are great together and Dwayne will just add to that. Woot Woot

  32. 32

    For the record, the movie is not officially called "Fast 5". It is still being called "Fast and Furious 5" and it is taking place in Rio.