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Michael Lohan Flaps His Trap About Lindsay's Hearing!

| Filed under: Lindsay LohanDrugsMichael Lohan


Wow! It took him almost two hours to respond! That has to be some kind of record for him!

Who knew he could stay quiet for so long!

Lindsay Lohan won't be going to jail (yet) and her father, Michael Lohan, couldn't be happier. He told Life & Style:

"I'm in favor of anything that keeps my daughter out of jail and helps her with her substance-abuse problem."

He also is in favor of anything that happens to her that then prompts the media to ask him about it. Man has priorities!

Now, Lindsay must adhere to all the conditions set forth by the judge this morning, including wearing that nifty SCRAM bracelet, or else she will get sent to jail.

Or maybe she won't. We're sure that she'll find some excuse if the thing "magically" turns off.

Oh no, the battery died! Oh no, her non-alcoholic beverage spilled on it! Oh no, her sister accidently sawed it off with her eyebrows!

Maybe we've said too much! Don't want to give her ideas!

[Image via WENN.]

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27 comments to “Michael Lohan Flaps His Trap About Lindsay's Hearing!”

  1. 1

    HAHAHAHA, sawed it off with her eyebrows! I don't care who you are, that was funny!

  2. 2

    LOL Perez, that was a good one, got a good laugh out of the eyebrows sawing!!

  3. 3

    tooo funny!!!! i heard alot of things in my life, but cutting something with your eye brows! hehe

  4. 4

    Yah. And none of you A holers who write this crap, do drugs or drink. Ohhhhhh that's right. Your perfect. i forgot.

  5. 5

    hahah, maybe her sister sawed it off with her eyebrows!! haha, classsicccc!!!!!!!

  6. 6

    It amazes me how you feel entitled to report on Lohan, but her Dad is not entitled to speak to the media. STFU Perez…… At least he's not the enabler.

  7. R.B.A says – reply to this


    That eyebrow crack was priceless.

  8. 8

    What is amazing is that the pile of shit called Michael Lohan is probably the one person in Lindsay's life who wants her to get sober. I guess with 2 shitty parents, it was practically a given that Lindsay would be a fuck up.

  9. 9

    I need some landscaping done, could I borrow her eyebrows?

  10. 10

    LOL okay the sawing off with eyebrows thing made me laugh. A glimmer of the old Perez shines through his now predictable and cut/copy/pasted website, thank GOD!

  11. 11

    let her say whatever excuse she wants judge will throw her butt in the pokey. She wasnt having any excuses today.

  12. 12

    …once again the assault on Lindsay continues…the vampires that continue to feed on her continue to live at her expense…one day Lindsay you will be free of all these people….Scario included….remember…if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem….that saying probably doesn't exist on cuba….to continue to attack her is virtual assault and attempted murder……

  13. 13

    'Oh no, her sister accidently sawed it off with her eyebrows!' snorted with laughter then. hahaha

  14. 14

    I work for a company who specializes in parole monitoring including the SCRAM bracelet. Hasn't she had this before?! Im telling you, if this girl tampers with the device in ANY way, it will automatically result in a conviction… And this judge doesnt sound like she is playin around. Get it girl.

  15. 15

    I agree with the above poster - it is a sad day in hell when Michael Lohan is the parent trying to get you sober, not your own mother, not your own lawyer / "advocate." And, just as a side note - doesn't anyone else think the whole eyebrow thing on the Curious-Case-of-Ali-Agedhan is to deflect that she's about to get a nose / boob job… she'll sheer the brows and say people only think I look different because the face looks diff after you trim brow … blah blah. But, mark my words- it'll be the nose … (and some boobs where none now exist).

  16. 16

    her sister "sawed it off with her eyebrows"?! That is the funniest fucking thing you have said in a looooooong time! :-)

  17. JET says – reply to this


    Why was LiLo flashing her cleavage in court today? Is the Judge a lesbian ???

  18. fiona says – reply to this


    Dressed like a slutty secretary. Another brilliant move.

    Her punk ass expression in court said it all. She is shameless and surly.

  19. 19

    She's worn one of these bracelets before and I'm pretty sure had no problem with it then??? And the person up there is right, if she messes with it she'll be convicted.

  20. 20

    I am so unbelievably tired of all these people, I want to puke. This family is the greatest possible example of how rotten and putrid our society has become. These parents have shamelessly sold their kids to hell just to get their faces on Access Hollywood. And the really sad thing is that whether we'd admit it or not, we as a society can't get enough of this garbage.

    A SPECIAL MESSAGE TO PEREZ- If you're really as tired and disgusted by these people as you say you are, PLEASE STOP SHOWERING ATTENTION ON THEM. It doesn't matter if its positive or negative press. These people obviously thrive on any publicity, good or bad. If we all want these people to go away, lets just ignore their meaningless lives and focus our attention on people who are actually contributing positively to our society. This is the ONLY way these parasites will shrivel up and disappear.

  21. 21

    Lindsay lohan will probably PLAGUE socitey as long as she lives and breathes…some people just miss the boat entirely when it comes to having their shit together even when they get all THE HELP IN THE WORLD

  22. 22

    If he wanted to hep her, he'd be pleased if she DID go to jail. That's the only way left to stop her self-denial.

  23. 23

    What a liar - someone needs to call her out.


    If I were that judge, I'd schedule 'random' screenings every 5 minutes and one right after another.

  24. 24

    That girl needs the SCRAM and a stay in rehab! I give her less than a month to eff this one up! Whatever her excuse will be - I know it will be priceless!

  25. 25

    Throw her ass in jail. NON celebs have to pay the piper so should she. She craps just like everyone else does. I am so sick of the celebs getting away with their crimes and wrong doings. Throw her ass in jail.

  26. 26

    Pig Face…famewhore enabler 24/7. Enabler and hypocrite!

  27. 27

    What is she wearing??? That is a very inappropriate shirt to wear to court. Her lawyer should have told her that looking demure is probably the way to go if you want the judge to take you seriously. A court house isn't a night club, but maybe she can't tell the difference any more?