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Lucky Break, LiLo!

| Filed under: Lindsay LohanDrugsBusted!

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Someone's looking out for Lindsay Lohan!

You might not agree since currently she has a black box attached to her ankle, she hasn't had a job since the bargain bin classic Labor Pains and she is starting to look like Ke$ha's twin sister, but trust us, this bitch is LUCKY!

If you follow the Adventures of Lindsanity, you know that currently, she is dealing with her DUI case from 2007. One of the charges being examined in the case is whether or not Lindsay was shoving white powder up her nose while swerving down the PCH. Sources are now reporting that she could have been and that there was evidence to support the claim, but the cop who arrested her on the scene threw said evidence in the trash!

Why? Because he is an enormous bone head!

According to the Santa Monica Police report, when the cop was inspecting LiLo's vehicle after her joy ride, he "discovered a folded Clinique sun care card with an unknown substance caked on to the surface of the card in Lohan's right rear pocket."

Dead giveaway, right? This is Lindsay Lohan, after all! A world renowned coke fiend. What else could this mysterious white powder be??? Oh, just wait!

The report goes on to say:

"Some of the white substance fell to the floor. I used my foot to see what had fell but thought nothing of it. I did not recognize the substance attached to the card and initially thought the substance was a wet crushed breath mint."

What??? What kid of cop are you that can't tell the difference between cocaine and altoids??? You know, humans are exquipped with FIVE senses. Even if it LOOKED like a mint, we bet it didn't SMELL like one.

And here's where Lindsay gets her Get Out Of Major Time Spent In Jail Free Card. The report adds:

"I put the card into the jail trash can next to the booking windows. I was looking at the floor and began to recognize the substance as resembling powder cocaine. I then recovered the card from the trash."

And by recovering from the trash, he means after 2 whole minutes, he thought about how stupid he was, pulled the card out of the bin, finally put the damn thing in an evidence envelope and then tried to "scoop" the remaining cocaine that fell on the floor to put in a separate envelope.

All that adds up to two words: EVIDENCE CONTAMINATION!!!

After all that, Lindsay got 84 minutes in jail, a slap on the wrist and a great story to tell the other coke-heads down at Chateau Marmont.

Ugh! Some trolls have all the luck!

[Image via WENN.]

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19 comments to “Lucky Break, LiLo!”



  1. 1

    DUH!!!!!!!!!1



  2. 2

    hahahaha thats fucking awsome



  3. 3

    What a copy and paste looser you are.



  4. 4

    Wow Perehilda, you really amaze me… I didn't know you was so instructed in police work, you should be training them. You already mastered the art of "copy and paste", now your next step should be "sniff and determine" Bam.. what a talented fuckatard!!!!!!



  5. 5

    she's not gonna get a lucky break come July 6th….



  6. 6

    WATCHed HER LAST NIGHT ON SOME FASHION SHOW THAT SUCKS…..
    I just can't believe that she would show up COKED OUT to a shoot and everyone act like it's no big deal and cater to her like it's ok for her to be that way…
    Now if I was to come across those pictures in a magazine after watching them make that shoot, the first thing that's gonna come to my mind is how coked up she was..
    She is such a crack head, you can't help but be embarrass for her when you watch her..
    The saddest part about that is it looks as if her Mom is pretty proud of that because after all that's what she's now famous for, a coke head and even coke heads can gain allot of publicity….

  7. YUCK says – reply to this


    7

    you just really hate and envy this girl. I guess the two feelings go hand in hand. you are a huge hater. she is beautiful anyone can see that.



  8. 8

    reminds me of when I wet the bed and came up with the explanation that my brother scribbled with a yellow crayon and poured water on it



  9. 9

    That outfit is FUGLY! Does she really think she looks good or did she just not look inthe mirror? I cant stand this no talent whatsoever girl and would love to see her get what she deserves . . . JAIL!!!!!



  10. 10

    UNREAL! One day her luck is going to run out!



  11. 11

    they forgot the part of the story where HOhan blew the cop so he would throw the evidence in the trash.



  12. 12

    LMAO! Some people just hate on you because you tell it like it is…well somewhat:)



  13. 13

    Why can't they just let this girl be? the paps won't be happy til something happens to her ! omg leave her alone already!!



  14. 14

    Re: Shazze – ha is that a real story?

  15. Jayla says – reply to this


    15

    Im more concerend about all the robbers, murderers and rapist who get let go due to police officers such as this one who can not perform their job tasks properly.

    Check out My Blog: open.salon.com/blog/celebublog



  16. 16

    Stop being so harsh on her, Perez. :[



  17. 17

    lindsay must have given that cop a skull job



  18. 18

    Just die already, bitch. Do us all a favor. You are a waste of ugly skin.



  19. 19

    hey babycakes i bet your uglier u dumbfuck yeah she doesnt have to look in the mirror becuz theres already bitches like you looking at her for her so yeah thats kinda sad u hate on someone yet so interested in there life at the same time…