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AMAZING. Michael Lohan Produces A Song For Lindsanity!

| Filed under: Lindsay LohanMusic MinuteWacky, Tacky & TrueMichael Lohan

This is ACTUALLY better than Christmas!

It's always been abundantly clear that Michael Lohan is a man of many talents - he is an expert wife beater, an unrelenting famewhore, and of course, a delusional ex-con, but we never knew that he was also a nuanced song-writer!

We beg you to PLEASE listen (above) to a Poppa Lohan penned instant classic, A Father's Love, allegedly written in honor of his beloved meal-ticket Lindsanity while he was behind bars, himself.

Unfortunately, it appears that Michael has not contributed his own vocal stylings to the stunning piece, but we hope that when his little princess is released from Lynwood, he'll be waiting for her outside blaring this classic from a ghetto-blaster a la John Cusack in Say Anything!

Her anger and resentment over years of abuse, exploitation, and neglect would melt away!



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33 comments to “AMAZING. Michael Lohan Produces A Song For Lindsanity!”

  1. 1

    old news….. then again this is ph

  2. 2


  3. 3


  4. 4

    There ought to be a law against this.

  5. 5

    Omg this is too hilarious!

  6. 6

    OMG he shoult just shut up

  7. 7

    does this remind anyone of james taylor's song fire and rain…especially the first few lines…

  8. 8

    Oh. My. God. If my dad did this to me, I'd disown him. That was painful!

  9. 9


  10. 10

    fuck… this sucks, his an asshole, he's just trying to have a lil'bite of attention because everybody is talking about lindsay, this is no father love, this is a famewhore.

  11. 11

    My favorite part is the fact that bc of the Project Runway ad, Tim Gunn is staring at it w/ the "wtf" face!

    If that were my dad - I think that would do MORE damage than help.

  12. 12

    LOL wow….this song is so cheesy.

  13. 13

    This man is so delusional, and not to mention a Narcissist. If he thinks he is better since being in jail, I can't imagine what he was like before. No wonder Lindsay does drugs. I feel like doing some everytime I read about him.

    Maybe he should go back to jail and practice on his song writing.

  14. 14

    Why am I suddenly reminded of when Cartman breaks out into song on South Park?

  15. 15

    AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I CALLED IT!!!! Although I'm surprised that this post didn't take 4 days……..
    (I called it in the Toy Story 3 comments about 2 pages back)


  16. L.C. says – reply to this


    LOL, so funny.

  17. lobri says – reply to this


    I feel terrible for laughing at this. No one deserves to be humiliated or exploited by their father this way. It's sickening. The song was cheesy and hilarious, but I can't not feel bad for Linsday. This should not have been used to make fun of her on this website. Make fun of Michael. But it's not her fault her father is such a disgusting asswhipe famewhore. I wish she'd get sober and start making movies again if only to spite him.

  18. 18

    Re: Che-rizzle – I remember thee! :D From the Toy Story 3 comments, that is..

  19. 19

    This reminds me of a really bad ballad from the 80's. He should have had Extreme sing this MESS. Holy hell is it bad… He is such a raging tool bag. I would love to see someone punch him right in his big right in the face.

  20. 20

    Omg!!!! Lindsay is going to be so disgust when she'll hear that! What he did to her especially with the medias is soo disgusting she'll never forget him!!! Lindsay is way better than that asshole I wish her the best and a life without that stalker!!

  21. 21

    Okay so maybe it isn't top-40 material… not even top 1,000 BUT, I think it's sweet. Obviously in some way, in his own way, he does care about his daughter. If he didn't, he would be worse than any cold-hearted serial killer you can think of. He's trying to reach out to her and it's falling on deaf ears… and to be honest? People like you aren't helping. When you consider the sentiment, and not the lyrical talent, or the fact that he didn't sing it himself, the thought is really clear. I feel bad for both he and his children, but particularly the children.

    I'm glad he wrote this, because I think it clearly demonstrates how he really feels, as he obviously has issues verbalizing it in person. I don't think he's being fake whatsoever.

  22. 22

    Re: Che-rizzle – Dude how many gossip sites are you trollin? Sorry, but the only reason you beat him is because you must not have a real job or you do have a real job and it sucks or your out of school for the summer and have no friends. No one can have the breaking news all the time.

    On the other hand I've heard worse music from the Real Housewives and Heidi Montag and Katie Price and at least Mr. I Love my Daughters Media Attention didn't make us sit through him singing it.

  23. 23

    Urgh. Why?
    More attention, this doesn't prove your a good man?!
    Oh! i've just thought!
    you could just imagine when she gets out?
    watch out for a daddy daughter duet….
    Urgh… That would NOT be good!
    the apocalypse is nigh i tell you!

  24. 24

    ahahahahhahaha…."what the reasons why" SUCH AWESOME writing skills!!!

  25. Booma says – reply to this


    OMG!! I LOVE it!! ha! It reminds of The TEAM AMERICA slow Song!! HA!! What a joke! How much did that singer get paid to spew that CRAP! AMAZE BALLS!

  26. Booma says – reply to this


    Re: xcalibur – Country song?? OMG…. NO this would NEVER work, it's garbage! I work in country Radio.. seriously honey.. Carrie Underwood would rather wear a dildo on her nose then sing this shiz!

  27. 27

    I couldn't do it. It is not often that anything makes me physically ill. This did it.

  28. Faux says – reply to this


    I feel bad for her. How can you not be screwed up with a dad like her

  29. 29

    This is horrifying!

  30. 30

    OMG and here I thought Lady Ga Ga was annoying.

  31. 31

    I am sorry but that was just fucking ODD! Is Michael in love with his daughter? Sick! & Perez YOUR VIDEOS SUCK WHY DO THEY ALWAYS FREEZE ON ME??? I am on a BRAND NEW COMPUTER AS WELL and after visiting your site I GET SPYWARE as well, NOT COOL DUDE, not cool!

  32. 32

    seriously if this was my father I would end up back in jail for stabbing him in the face! actually if the judge heard this song they would pardon me, then thank me for the public service of putting Michael Lohan to rest.

  33. 33

    Any opening lyics that start, "Woke up this morning…" are shut down by my brain, immediately.