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LOLhan's Naked Almost The Whole Time In Machete!

| Filed under: Lindsay LohanFilm Flickers


What an inspiring and nuanced return to cinematic greatness!

Although not much has been revealed about Lindsanity LOLhan's role in Robert Rodriguez's Machete - her first film since the direct-to-ABC Family Labor Pains - a tipster recently revealed that the hard-pAArtying wacktress truly sinks her teeth into an extremely significant role!

They write:

I saw Machete. It's really well-executed exploitation… but Lindsay is barely in it. She's nude almost the whole time (except for the "nun with a gun" scene), and she has a videotaped ménage à trois with her mother (not Dina) and Danny Trejo in a pool. Her father pulls her out of a drug den type situation and confesses (to priest Cheech Marin) to lustful thoughts about his daughter. "i just wish she'd look at me as more of a man." I don't know if the small role was tailored to her… But. Yeah.

Ha! Amazing!

It must have been difficult to inhabit such a deeply layered and complex role!

Or, you know, she should probably just skip playing a porn star in Inferno and segue straight over into the real thing!



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26 comments to “LOLhan's Naked Almost The Whole Time In Machete!”

  1. 1

    The director hyped her role to get attention for the movie and it worked. She was used. Interesting how that's OK to her in this case. Her choice of role was stupid too.

  2. 2

    What about your movie appearances FatBoy. OOPS sorry, I forgot.

  3. 3

    And what was your role in the movie? Oh, that's right…nothing.

  4. 4

    And you say that you are a caring person, Perez?
    You are a moron. Your time is almost up.

  5. 5

    looking forward to seeing those big titties on screen!!

  6. 6

    seriously peepee, your bitchiness towards her is getting old

  7. 7

    Anything with Lindsay in it is doomed to bomb. She is not the "talented actress' she believes herself to be. Could definitely see her doing porn though and that would probably make her bank.

  8. 8

    Sounds disgusting. Really what was she thinking?

  9. 9

    Who ever said this drug addled cvnt could act? She was a kid in Disney movies and she wasn't even that good in them. She should just die so Bristol can be on top.

  10. 10

    she really should not do the linda lovelace movie. she is still so young but she's playing parts that are going to really shorten whatever chance of a career she still has left

  11. 11

    i feel really sorry for her

  12. 12

    This bitch is so NAS-TAY. She was an ok kid actor but that "talent" didn't follow her into the teen years or adult years. The only way she gets roles is if she'll exploit herself. I mean, she's in the Sham Wow guy's new movie for fuck's sake!

  13. @v@ says – reply to this


    Is this constant on screen nudity another Adderall decision?

  14. cozmo says – reply to this


    let the woman make some money! you bitch if she's a loser don't you? it has a Quentin feel to it.

  15. 15

    Everyone uses this girl. She's like a free-for-all. And then when they get tired of her they'll just throw her away. Sad.

  16. 16

    This just makes me sad how people use young stupid girls for sex and exploitation. I bet if it was legal to fuck girls as young as 12 and put them in these types of movie roles people would be doing that too. Women are infantilized…encouraged to stay young and stupid forever…b/c young and stupid is fuckable. I know so many men…that the only reason they don't date underage age girls is b/c it's illegal. So fucking sad. B/c you know when these girls finally grow up…these same men will kick them to the curb and say "NEXT!". Lindsay's going to realize soon how everybody has used her…taken all they can from her…and then disposed of her. What is this girl going to do when she loses her looks in…like….5 years?

  17. 17

    could you just tilt the gun 90 degrees to the right please

  18. 18

    I never expected her part to be big. You could tell from the very first trailer you showed Perez. And the new trailer doesn't have her at all. I want to see it though, because of Michelle ;)

  19. 19

    You can be such an asshole sometimes. Have you ever considered constructive criticism? I mean, I would admire you more if you weren't so bitchy most of the time. Karma is going to kick your ass

  20. 20

    Is that a leech coming out of her mouth?

  21. 21

    All I can say is Hell Yeah!
    I love Lindsay and her delicious body.

  22. 22

    A "Menage A Trois" eh? How very Motley Crue of them!

  23. 23

    it sounds great

  24. 24

    Not that shocking; Most former child stars get their goods out on screen at least once…

  25. 25

    thoughts ….hmmmm. Maybe you could stop being an asshole? The girl just got out of rehab! You constantly put people down unless they are T-Swizzle ( nickname makes me sick) and Gagaloo (oops just sick in my mouth) get a grip. You might have lost some weight but you are yet to get rid of the massive chip on your shoulder! So what if she isnt in it much, it was never a starring role. Stop pulling at threads and making posts about nothing dumb ass.

  26. 26

    oh so that is what those nun pictures are for…this movie. yes i do want to see this…not because of her tho, michelle rodriguez is in it.