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An Open Letter To Lindsay Lohan…This Time From Pat O'Brien

| Filed under: Lindsay LohanInspiration

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We feel like we basically took care of the "Open Letter" thing with our video Life Coaching With Perez: An Open Letter To Lindsay Lohan, but for those of you out there who'd like to see more, here's an open letter from entertainment anchor/radio host Pat O'Brien:

Dear Lindsay:

Do us all a favor and take a snapshot of your life on this Friday, Sept. 3, 2010. By all accounts, you are reasonably healthy right now.

You are out of jail.

You've completed another rehab. Right now, people are buying tickets to your movie, "Machete," with a formidable Hollywood cast. And you grace the cover of the new Vanity Fair magazine, looking ever the movie star with all the accompanying door prizes and presents: beauty, happiness, confidence, youth and that "have it all" look that the woman you are channeling, Grace Kelly, possessed. This is all good.

But hopefully, you'll also take a look at the negative of that photo you just snapped … and ponder what life has been and what life can be. Indeed, it was Grace Kelly who said of Hollywood: "It's a town without pity. I know of no other place in the world where so many people suffer from nervous breakdowns, where there are so many alcoholics, neurotics and so much unhappiness."

From where we all sit, this is also a big part of your snapshot … and despite all the crazy and mostly embellished media coverage of your life's journey, there remain a great number of people who are worried about you. I am one of them. I am also one of those alcoholics that Grace Kelly spoke of.

I've been through it, Lindsay. For me, there has been no jail, no courtroom antics, no ankle bracelet and, thankfully, I don't have the paparazzi snapping my every move. But I, too, have the same demons you have, and it's no fun. But there is good news and bad news about these demons. The bad news is that they never go away: We're wired differently. The good news is that with a certain amount of willingness, structure and personal inventory, those demons can be arrested. And the ones who survive, like myself so far, are the ones who accept that these are the cards that were handed us and we don't have to always gamble our lives away.

The important thing to remember is that this is your life and nobody else's. And there's no blame; it's not the media's fault or the paparazzo's fault or even your father's fault. He's got enough problems of his own. It has nothing to do with growing up too fast or being too young or even the jungle Grace Kelly hated called Hollywood. It's a seemingly simple, yet incredibly complicated disorder that millions of Americans share. It's a brain disease that brings terrible and embarrassing consequences. There's no cure, but with the right focus it can be tamed. [It's] not my place to tell you how to do this because, by now, you know where to seek help.

The great late talk-show host Tom Snyder once asked me on his show, "What killed Elvis?" My answer was, "Not what, but who?" I went on to explain that nobody ever said no to the King of Rock and Roll and eventually that killed him. Nobody said much to Marilyn Monroe, either. The brilliant and talented Dennis Hopper had his demons and conquered them and died with years of sobriety, yet the 10th, 11th and 12th words in his obituary were "drugs and alcohol."

It really isn't any of our business, but we are all spectators in what has become a sad three-ring circus. We buy Vanity Fair. We buy movie tickets. We give up precious moments of our busy lives to watch some of those television shows looking for a rating by ambushing you. (Yeah, "The Insider" really wanted to do a story on your closet!) So we are invested in the Lindsay Lohan business, and I have to be honest that most of us are rooting for you.

On this Friday, your press is great. Your castmates are loving and holding out their hands in a snapshot you should frame. Take a deep breath and look at yourself right now and think how it would be if every day was like this: full of smiles and promises. I hope you've learned that this is possible. Many have discovered a new journey, and it's a much more satisfying road with a better destination. You have to realize that the consequences of denial start to get much more serious than Perez Hilton making fun of you. Sadly, it's well-documented that the consequence waiting for you could be death. To me, it seems an easy choice.

In the meantime, good luck with the movie, hand out the new Vanity Fair to your real friends and take life one day at a time.

Hopefully, I'll see you soon. I suggest the nearest Starbucks.

Your friend,

Pat O'Brien

What do U think of Pat O'Brien's advice to Lindsay?

[Images via WENN.]

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70 comments to “An Open Letter To Lindsay Lohan…This Time From Pat O'Brien”



  1. 1

    EXCELLENT!!! Kudos to him. I just hope Lohan's response isn't 'Pat who?'



  2. 2

    It's nice that he is reaching out



  3. 3

    Spot on. Finally someone reaches out to her with class, dignity and respect. Whether or not she listens, Pat has done a very sincere thing for her and I hope it sinks in for her.



  4. 4

    It's a nice letter!



  5. 5

    Eloquent.



  6. 6

    That actually is an awesome letter. He's right. However, she'll stick her nose in the air at him though and deny anything is wrong with her as always



  7. 7

    I will admit I rolled my eyes at first when I saw Pat O'brien writing a letter… but it actually gave me chills. It was written really well.

  8. CHA says – reply to this


    8

    Great Letter.. Kudos to him….Hopes that she consider his words carefully…..Rooting for you Lins.



  9. 9

    I think it's a really beautiful and touching message that Pat O'Brien sent out to Lindsay. Too bad I don't think she will listen…



  10. 10

    I did not read this. I refuse to read anymore posts on her. Why does everrryone have to be up in her business? You know what the BEST thing we can do for this girl? STOP writing about her. She LOVES the publicity and attention. Just stop for awhile. When she realizes no one cares, she'll straighten up. Right now she is getting publiciy for all the WRONG reasons.



  11. 11

    Lindsay's not addicted TO ANYTHING; Pat O'Brien has RELAPSED and is talking out of his ***!



  12. 12

    Love, Love Love it. I pray she accually reads, and absorbs such great advice. He is a very wise soul!!!



  13. 13

    Good letter…even for a non-addict/non-celebrity/basic civilian like me, this letter has some very applicable advice, and shows a good perspective on how to view/take life. Hopefully Ms. Lohan reviews it during a moment of clarity and maturity and lets it in, rather than reads it with a closed mind.

  14. Tahoe says – reply to this


    14

    Wonderful. I hope she heeds his advise and reaches out for help. Starbucks sounds pretty good for starters.



  15. 15

    YOU did not read this, did you MARIO? If you did, you would realize that this is heartfelt, deep and for once, Pat is also taking blame for what HE DID. Now, if only Lindsay AND DINA would read it and admit the truth. Michael might be a slime, but he has no fault on what she does now in life. Lindsay has to ACT LIKE AN ADULT, and stop running to Mommy. These past 2 decades, and now especially with the President we have, IT IS BLAME SOMEONE ELSE FOR OUR PROBLEMS. Our problems, for the most part, unless it is a natural disaster, a crime has been done against you, or something totally out of the persons control, ARE OUR OWN CREATION, AND WE ARE TO BLAME. Not mommy, daddy, our mean boss, the neighbor down the street, or Sarah Palin, Perez. Lindsay, and many, many others on this planet have to take control of their lives and SOLVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS, no one else is going to do it for them (Dina is just screwing it up more) and no one else CARES and no one is going to respect you until you suck it in and say, 'I screwed up, I am sorry, I will not do it again. and you don't. BUT, when you have people in Hollywood blowing Sunshine up your Ass, I suppose it is hard to know where the real sun is shining.



  16. 16

    Beautifull words.. Hope she will take them to heart..



  17. 17

    Pat O'Brian's letter was beautiful. He has walked with her demons and knows the battle that Hollywood is to anyone in the business.
    He was dead on with her choices and did so with intelligence and love.
    I believe the way he reached out to her might be something she will be able to connect with.
    Very well done, Pat. Hopefully, she will hear the most important part of your letter, we are all rooting for her.



  18. 18

    I'm sobbing… I feel like it was written to me.



  19. 19

    Pat O'Brien is a big, huge douchebag HYPOCRITE. In his letter he mentions "embellished media coverage". Well - he was part of all that kiss-ass/bullshit/tabloid media coverage. And he and his show probably would have sold their souls to get some kind of a kiss-ass/bullshit interview with Lohan. He probably is hoping this letter will get him good PR and an "exclusive" interview with Lindsay or her Z-lister father. Then O'Brien can peddle his big exclusive to some tacky entertainment show. Fame whores live on…



  20. 20

    they should go get a hooker and some blow together and go crazy



  21. 21

    I hope my daughter reads this. She's also an alcoholic and an actress. You really throw away so much when you don't try to get help for your addictions.



  22. 22

    Aahhh Perez, its not that they're, as you put it "soul mates". Its that they are, along with myself, part of a real God loving fellowship that does make life so much better in this world. I hope for you Perez that your weight loss was of a healthy nature, but who knows you may have a chair in this fellowship and at this point in your life your just not able to spell out your name on that chair. Love & Tolerance is our code



  23. 23

    Compassionate, insightful and beautiful. I hope it moves her heart to get on or stay on the right path.



  24. 24

    YOu know what, Perez? I think you and Pat O'brien and the rest of the world, but especially Lindsay, could benefit from no more "advice" no more coverage, no more specualting. In short, do her a favor and ignore her! For her own good. She could benefit from some "neglect" right now. Let her be.

    Why not focus on Paris and her troubles?? Hmmm? You don't give Paris the same treatment. But then Paris is RICH. You like that in a girl! LOL!



  25. 25

    Wow, words of wisdom to live by. It really had a tone of sincerity and the advice was really spot on. I'm impressed with him for reaching out to her and hope she'll heed his advice. He's been through the ringer a few times as well and from what it sounds like, he's got his shiz together. Good for him and I hope she'll jump on that advice.



  26. 26

    Pat's letter is supportive; Lindsay needs to know she can form good habits just as easily as bad habits. Challenge herself with something new, with new people in a new place. Tennis, yoga, whatever — just get the eff out of Los Angeles and figure her path out without anyone who gets high & without the idiots that keep telling her yes.



  27. 27

    I think that is this is a very sincere letter from a man who seems to genuinely care about Lindsay's well being. he's been there to a degree and it seems he ( again genuinely ) wants to help prevent someone else from going down the same path as he did - for as long as he did.
    I think this was a very sweet thing that he did.



  28. 28

    he made be teary eyed.



  29. 29

    Pat, not the "it's a disease" thing! Cancer, TB, leukemia are diseases. Putting garbage in your body is a choice. People have been brainwashed into thinking that if it's called a disease, then you're absolved from any responsibility from the havoc you cause. "I couldn't help it - I have a disease" Oh fuck, any of us could say that! Don't say "but I'm wrestling with my demons and that's the only way I could make it through!" We're all wrestling with our demons, but not all of us choose to deal with them in a destructive manner. Don't say I don't know what I'm talking about - embarrassingly, I was married to an alcoholic/drug addict for almost 25 years. Why did I stay so long? Because I bought the I.A.D mentality, until I woke up one day and figured it out.



  30. 30

    A classy letter from a guy seriously facing his own demons. People are afraid to say no to LiLo. Will she listen to O'Brien's message? No. She's too young, foolish, and way too pampered to heed the message. Kudos to O'Brien for caring.



  31. 31

    It may have Lindsey's name on it, but that very well written piece should be photocopied and given to every spoiled Hollywood Brat who has never been told "No". Great choice of words, and he actually treats her with more dignity than she probably deserves.

    I'm guessing she's rolling her eyes and telling her mom that he has no clue,and her mom is saying, "Yes, Dear. You are so right."



  32. 32

    This is obviously his 12th. step in AA. Reaching out. Personly I say but out.He's using her situation to futher his agenda.



  33. 33

    This double rehabbed alcoholic thinks he's capable of giving advice to Lindsay Lohan?….please….It was his drunken coked-out calls that cost him his job. A string of dirty voicemails where O’Brien expresses his desires for cocaine, hookers, and wild sex have been leaked all over the internet.



  34. 34

    nice to see an active member of the program who is famous and doing the deal. he is right. 100%.
    The idea that somehow, someday he will
    control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal
    drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue
    it into the gates of insanity or death.



  35. 35

    Re: Los Anjealous – Putting things into your system is a choice at first. The addiction part is the disease.



  36. 36

    We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits.

  37. uyeah says – reply to this


    37

    The guy is spot on.



  38. 38

    hey , ya got a shout out !

  39. 8008s says – reply to this


    39

    its not like she's a great actor..she's only relevant for her fu*k ups!…hope you get better bb, but hey we all LOVE the circus



  40. 40

    While I agree that the letter is from tthe heart and well written, he is copletly off about Machete being HER movie (?!!)

    She was barred from mthe premere in Venice and they cut her out of the previews, her name is NOT mentioned anywhere … she must be so pissed, guess Rodriguez has second thoughts bout working with her and decided to cut her out, now that is HOLLYWOOD COLD.

  41. Kakia says – reply to this


    41

    Re: Los Anjealous – I'm addicted to pain pills. They were prescribed to me and I took them as directed and I still ended up addicted. My grandmother was a social drinker for 60 years and never had a problem but became an alcoholic not long before she died. How could any of us, including her, ever guess that she could ever develop a problem?



  42. 42

    Lindsay should sincerely thank Pat, print this out, put it on her mirror -> stare at herself & it & read it every morning when she gets up & every night before she goes to sleep [hopefully sober]. He is speaking genuinely from a position of being older & wiser… if he could go back to her age & know what he knows now… LISTEN TO HIM LINDSAY, TIME FLYS & if you don't & are lucky/blessed enough to survive to be Pat's age…You WILL wish you had!



  43. 43

    she should print this letter out and tape it to her mirror.



  44. 44

    good on ya Pat O'Brien.



  45. 45

    I think he was very nice in what he said and hope she reads it and heads his message. Please Lindsay for you own sake listen to your family and friends who all love you and want you to get your head back on straight and be the star you can be with out all the booze and drugs. Your a good actress and have many movies in your future if you would just straighten up and fly right.



  46. 46

    hope she reads it. and hope some of it sinks into her brain… the letter is sincere and very well written.



  47. 47

    I think the letter is wise and full of wisdom. AA is the only known cure from ALcoholism.



  48. 48

    Pat is a little early in his "recovery" to be giving advice to anyone, I also think He's not giving advice to some kid in sacramento, he is trying to hitch his name and desease to someone in the news now. He is a star-fucker. having said that, the advice is not bad, but LoLo needs a stronger voice to really speak to her.



  49. 49

    Both Pat and Lindsey have relapsed. No one is perfect! That was a great letter though, I hope Lindsey sees herself in it.



  50. 50

    What a kind thing for you to do Pat. I agree, finally someone that approaches her with dignity. Thank you.



  51. 51

    Lindsay, you are so lucky that this guy took time out of his life to write you this message. This is a real gift.



  52. 52

    And the rich man in torments said to Abraham, "Allow me to go and visit my brothers so they will avoid my fate", and Abraham said "They have the prophets to teach them". The rich man entreated saying "But if I return from the dead they'll listen!" and Abraham replied "If they will not listen to Moses and prophets then even one returning from the dead will not make them listen". Paraphrased of course but lets hope Lindsay listens and understands she really got away withit again and next time may be her last.



  53. 53

    i wish her well



  54. 54

    This grown-ass man has nothing else better to do than write a long-ass stinking letter to Lindsay Blohan, wtf's up with that?



  55. 55

    I think that was amazingly heartfelt. It was great advice. I just hope that she actually reads it, and makes the necessary changes. He's completely right about being wired differently. Addiction is a disease. People should stop making fun of her, and taking advantage of it.

  56. Ee78 says – reply to this


    56

    What about the prison minister who was actually going to serve LL's time? I would say that was taking it a bit further than writing an open letter. DO SOMETHING for others…. not just lip servce.



  57. 57

    she should really take this to heart. we are rooting for her - i am, at least. i know other fans are, too. i've made some jokes about her before but really all i wanna' see is another hollywood comeback, a big f*ck you to all the haters, and another movie like mean girls..



  58. 58

    Channelling Grace Kelly??? oh puleeze



  59. 59

    I didn't even read past the 2nd paragraph, but if mr o'brien is taken that much time to write her an open letter, he is only asking for attention for himself, he's full of himself, not to mention what else he's full of……

    what does he want us to do, grovel and bow down at his feet, oh yes, wise one mr pat…..



  60. 60

    why does everyone that has something to say to lindsay have to do it for all to see??? if he cared that much he should send it privately I dontt hink its cool to pubclically address her! he comes across as another fame whore getting publicity in lindsays name.



  61. 61

    Perfect!!! At first I thought WTF!!!, he's an old drunk himself. But this letter was well written and came from a place of experience and understanding. I hope she takes it to heart.



  62. 62

    hes right but i want to say this to lindsay

    its all good at 23 at 33 noone gives a crap so u either get ur finger out now or no pie for u… at 43 well u may as well be dead



  63. 63

    Outstanding advice.



  64. 64

    nice he took the time to write a letter, doubt if she gets it, denial, combined with victim attitude. Everytime I read something she said, my eyes cross.



  65. 65

    The LAST thing Lindsay's needs is another old man giving her advice via the press. Dealing with a father like Michael Lohan is horrible enough and would drive anyone to drink.



  66. 66

    Wow. That was beautiful.

  67. @v@ says – reply to this


    67

    Doesn't she have a private mail box where he could send his concerns and best wishes? Yikes.



  68. 68

    If he wrote that then i have to say it is very spot on and eloquent.

    Better than anything ANYONE has said or written previously.

    Maybe he should get together with Dr. Drew and counsel at his facility. What he has to say is probably more insightful and inspiring than anything I have seen on the rehab show!

    Best to read this every night Lindsay. He speaks the honest truth. It is as black and white as it sounds. So now that you are in the elevator between floors, are you going to choose to go 'down' or 'up'?



  69. 69

    His letter is very heart felt. After watching Lindsay's fun performance in "Machete" this weekend, I truely hope she gets her life back on track and can salvage her career. I hope she can stop with the entitlement bullshit and be humbled by her experiences. Sadly I think Dina is a poison in her life. Good luck, Lindsay.



  70. 70

    Re: Los Anjealous – you're retarded and have no clue