It's official! After fans have asked the right f*cking questions for months about who would star in the next season of True Detective, we finally have our answer!
Red Bull - consider yourself OWNED! (At least for the next week or so…)
Team Sheen, rejoice and be glad, because now you too can drink Tiger's Blood and pAArty like Charlie Sheen. Harco Laboratories has just released a new energy drink that promises to pack enough of a punch to bring you to a Charlie level of
Via the companies the website, Harco promises that their "Bi-Winning Tiger Blood" will give you all the energy you need to conquer your day while merely sipping on their libation in your own Sober Valley Lodge. They add:
"It's made from 100% passion specifically to make your brain fire in a way that's not from this particular terrestrial realm. Tiger Blood allows you to use household items, you're welcome to take more drugs than anyone can survive. Be different, have a different brain, and a different heart. When you feel Tiger Blood in your veins, you'll realize dying's for fools and that can't is the cancer of happen. Period. The end.
Note: This product does not do any of the above, and we don't know what banging 7 gram rocks means. It is, however, a delicious fruit punch flavored energy shot packing 80mg of caffeine. WINNING.
Also: Don't do drugs. Seriously. Don't. Do. Drugs."
Radical. Bitchin'. Tubular. (Wait, has he used that one yet? Eh, only a matter of time.)
One bag will cost you $4, but an "epic 4-pack" can be purchased for $15.96. Take our advice - save your money. Do yourself one better and heed their disclaimer about not doing drugs.
The world already has one Charlie Sheen. Isn't that enough?