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Scientists To Study Shakespeare's Remains For Marijuana

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Anyone who ever read A Midsummer Night’s Dream had to have pondered the amount of pot William Shakespeare smoked.

From fairies to orgies and all that blood, Shakespeare definitely had an overactive imagination.

And now paleontologists are trying to exhume the late wordsmith’s body to prove he had something helping him.

Don’t freak out, lit junkies. No disrespect is intended for the body. Instead of digging him out, they just plan on digitally scanning his bones to look for clues.

How much did he smoke thee, weed? Let us count the ways.

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13 comments to “Scientists To Study Shakespeare's Remains For Marijuana”



  1. 1

    This is a bit silly. Any Shakespeare 101 course will teach that he didn't actuallu make up the plot lines himself. At the time, plays/stories were recycled from existing ones. He's not famous for his stories - he's renowned for his influence on the English language. A wordsmith for sure - but to credit him with creating all the characters and plot out of his own imagination would be a false assumption. Besides, if Marlowe hadn't died an untimely death, we'd be talking about him and not Shakespeare.
    Still curious if he was a pothead though…



  2. 2

    I cant believe they spend money for this stupidities. Really, scientists dont have anything better to do at all!?.



  3. 3

    That line about "How much did he smoke thee, weed? Let us count the ways." I assume you thought you were being clever?
    I am hoping that you know that Shakespeare didn't write that line and that it was actually Elizabeth Barrett Browning.



  4. 4

    How are they going to scan his body unless they remove his casket or what he is 'buried' under the Holy Trinity Church in the town of Stratford -upon-Avon. His wife and Sister is also buried there, so, they would have to figure out whose bones are whose. How well their caskets are, their bones are? The 3 died around 400 YEARS AGO!!!! And if there is something OTHER THEN DUST in the tomb, X-Raying it, how is it going to show pot use?



  5. 5

    Shakespeare also did not want anyone messing with his dead body once it was put in it's final resting place. He put what was felt was a 'CURSE' on his TOMB' for anyone who DARED mess with his BONES. The tombstone is inscribed with the following words, which are believed to have written by Shakespeare:

    Good friend for Jesus sake forbear
    To dig the dust enclosed here!
    Blest be the man that spares these stones,
    And curst be he that moves my bones
    So, go ahead and try to see if a bunch of dust has chemicals related to pot. (did they smoke pot 400 YEARS AGO??? At that time, who knows what could have been rolled up, smashed, crushed, etc. and smoked, inhaled, etc.?) They started this because a bunch of pipes were found in the BARD'S garden. Maybe he just liked posing with a good tobacco pipe? Or his wife?



  6. 6

    Hey Einstein, paleontologists study DINOSAURS, not people. I think 'archaeologists' is the word you were looking for.



  7. 7

    @purewikiblue - They've always compared Shakespeare's and Browning's sonnets. I think it's perfect he used that line bc now they're going to compare his remains to others found with drug clues.



  8. 8

    Re: supersoup – I also like how Einstein used the word thee. Did Perez even get his GED?



  9. 9

    it all makes sense now …



  10. 10

    To what blood in "A Midnight's Summer Dream" Are You Referring Oh Graceless Slaughterer of All Things Literate?



  11. 11

    You guys are such haters.

    There's blood in tons of his plays. Just because he referenced one play doesn't mean that's all he's talking about (cause Midsummer sure aint the only play ab orgies either).

    Also, to the person who's talkin' about paleontologists. Hate to break your bubble, but they're the ones who started this whole petition.

    Go play more Lords of Warcraft you internet slimes.



  12. 12

    Soursoup is correct… if a paleontologist were to study the remains, I'd hope to god they found some dinosaur bones in there… considering dinos didn't do drugs either, I don't see how anyone would believe they would work on human remains to discover evidence of drugs in or on the body. If they do find dinos, I'm putting my money on it being found with the body of Jesus.

    bioarchaeologists (or skeletal biologists) are the ones who specifically look at skeletal remains in an archaeological context…



  13. 13

    Come on Perez. Paleontologists are doing it? Do you remember watching Friends? Ross was a paleontologist at a museum.