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The Latest Abomination From The Ark Music Factory Is Upon Us!

| Filed under: Music Minute

There aren't enough magictives in our vocabulary for this, so we'll keep it simple:

WTF!!!

Meet Madison Bray. As her lyrics have informed us, she is 9-years-old and she is the latest kiddie star to emerge from The Ark Music Factory's House Of Horrors.

Is it just us or are these kids slowly getting younger and younger? We wouldn't be a damn bit surprised if the next video features a 2-year-old!

The song, Girl Swag … is not good. It sounds like something Willow Smith passed on in the recording studio, Kidz Bop picked up, spit on and then passed along to this girl with a brand new shiny box of auto-tune. Swagger on? Swagger off? OFF! ALWAYS OFF AT YOUR AGE!!!

If you can bare it, check out the video (above). But if you ask us, you'd be better off spending the three and half minutes praying that the next generation learn how to make fire and construct a wheel. We're sliding back into the Dark Ages - and FAST!

P.S. - We don't blame little Madison for this travesty. We blame her parents! Why would you subject your adorable, innocent child to this???

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37 comments to “The Latest Abomination From The Ark Music Factory Is Upon Us!”



  1. 1

    "Keys to my beemer" who gave the 9 year old a liscence??



  2. 2

    omigod.. just about that drunk that i watched, 2 minuites..damn



  3. 3

    Child stars become drug addicts.

  4. Rose says – reply to this


    4

    LOL.



  5. 5

    this is an insult….how can this be pitted as talent. Just makes it all the more tragic that a true talent like Amy Winehouse is no longer with us, look at what is coming through the ranks..disaster.



  6. 6

    She's so hardcore, lmao. I hate the over use of the word swag. Make it stop!!!



  7. 7

    i gues si have no idea what swagger means. I know the real meaning as how you walk like john wayne.. but not the lingo meaning



  8. 8

    she is friggin 9years old what swagger does she has?? and whats with the whole "im a bad ass gansta" moves??
    arents 9year olds supposed to be running round playing with barbie dolls? something's wrong with her thinking she has talent and her parents for making her get a record deal! its worse than rebecca black and r.black is pretty bad!!
    ten seconds in and i was like WTF!



  9. 9

    If she wants a music career then she should wait. She's too young to go looking for fame. Stick to school, kid, and go to university so you can have a back-up plan if you don't achieve what you want. It's a shame she's been introduced so young - all she'll want to do now is pursue fame rather then get on with her life. She's too young to be able to get her priorities straight.



  10. 10

    ridiculous! but on the up side, atleast she's dress appropriately for a 9 year old….for now.



  11. 11

    Mario, if you're so against this plethora of talentless children, then you should put your money where your mouth is and not post about them. Using the "other people post about them" argument won't work; you can choose to take the high road and stop exploiting children. Will you? Probably not, because you seem to have zero self control. But you SHOULD ignore them. And take the countdown for your ridiculous book down. Your shameless self-promotion is worse than Caca's.



  12. 12

    This song should be titled: "When Autotune Goes Wrong…" Horribly, HORRIBLY wrong.



  13. 13

    O-kay, so, you'll post this video of this 9 year old girl and say it's not good…..but you post those f-ing annoying videos of friggin' Matty B and rave about how he's the next big star???? PLEASE!!!!! HYPOCRITE!!!!



  14. 14

    what is worse is the fact her parents put her into this position. Poor kid, should be considered child endangerment.



  15. 15

    She's just as awful as that ass clown Matty B that you keep raving about! I take shits with more talent than these little fuckers



  16. 16

    she is just as good as any of the artists making it out there today.

    Please stop Hugh Hefner from going after her. He will put some fake boobs in her and add her to the 2 second club.



  17. 17

    Sounds exactly like all of the other "music" you push like Britney, "Chezza", etc. Why do you like them but not this girl? LOL!!!!



  18. 18

    I think of Willow Smith when I hear this. What's the difference? The girl has presence, more than the others. Give her a better song and she may have something.



  19. 19

    The Parents need to be tasered



  20. 20

    This is YOUR fucking fault, perez. YOU are part of the problem. WHO exploits kids on their website every single day? WHO??

    YOU!! you do this everday, every week. I'm reporting you to A commercial-free childhood org. I've had it.



  21. 21

    The fact that you write these things about a child is worst then the song and video put together. She is 9 years old, how many people can say that they acomplished such a thing by that age? None of im sure… If ragging on a 9 year old builds up your ego then you have much deeper issues then using the word swag 10,000 times in a song! ;)



  22. 22

    shes a cute little girl and i think her voice is nice, but this isnt her thing not age appropriate either



  23. 23

    You know.. there was once a 9 year old who could actually sing, and very cute at that and he didn't NEED fucking auto tune! Aaron Carter! Fucking what the holy hell is music becoming?! You don't need talent in corporate music anymore apparently to get heard. Music needs a fucking reboot and FAST!



  24. 24

    Oh my God! I made it into 90 seconds of it before I ran to the bathroom and vomitted. What are these parents doing to this poor girl? When I was this girls age I remember sitting in the car singing with my mother and I flat out asked her if I could sing and she said that she loved me, but that I couldn't hold a note. It hurt, but goddamn it, she was right. A good parent tells their child when they have no talent, they don't fucking give them thousands of dollars to make a music video to exploit their inabilities!!!



  25. 25

    What disturbs me about this song is the lyrics… yes, nine year-old child, you do need "nobody." Who's going to drive that Beamer of which you speak?

    On a serious note, I think it's weird how some of you want to report Perez for posting this. Is he the one who recorded it or put his child up to it? Once it's out there, it's out there.



  26. 26

    sounds like kesha, looks like a 9 year old.



  27. 27

    It's mini Cher Lloyd. The horror!

  28. k-lee says – reply to this


    28

    Re: nvmelaz – I wouldn't consider THIS an accomplishment, since her parents paid thousands of dollars to get this child a song and a music video. Any spoiled rat with rich parents can "accomplish" this.

  29. k-lee says – reply to this


    29

    *brat



  30. 30

    Perez is such a hypocrite! How is this bad, but Toddlers and Tiaras is ok?!



  31. 31

    This is horrible. What's even sadder is that she sounds remarkably like Britney Spears– and that's not a compliment to this girl, but certainly an insult to britney Spears.

    @It's Interesting : You are exactly right! Why is Matty B wonderful but this is disgusting? I think they're both ridiculous, but it is totally hypocritical of Perez.



  32. 32

    Pot meet Kettle… Ark Music Factory is stupid, but your musical endeavors are more alike than not Mario… silly man (especially the they get younger every day… Isn't MattyB 8?



  33. 33

    this is just as bad as Matty B that u are always shoving in our faces



  34. 34

    are you fucking kidding me? this is disgusting. and annoying. and irritating. you're 9 years old, go have a childhood. fucking ridiculous…



  35. 35

    that little boy at the beginning looks like clarissa darling's brother ferguson

  36. @v@ says – reply to this


    36

    It's not any worse than any of the other Ark vids or anything the Smith kids have put out.



  37. 37

    Really? People calling her a diva? Doubt it. And I don't think anyone has the keys to her beamer either…