Well, if she's gonna turn to anyone, we totally expect it to be the "consciously uncoupling" star!
Because, DUH! Who better to understand Beyoncé's pain than the Goop author?!
There aren't enough magictives in our vocabulary for this, so we'll keep it simple:
Meet Madison Bray. As her lyrics have informed us, she is 9-years-old and she is the latest kiddie star to emerge from The Ark Music Factory'
s House Of Horrors.
Is it just us or are these kids slowly getting younger and younger? We wouldn't be a damn bit surprised if the next video features a 2-year-old!
The song, Girl Swag … is not good. It sounds like something Willow Smith passed on in the recording studio, Kidz Bop picked up, spit on and then passed along to this girl with a brand new shiny box of auto-tune. Swagger on? Swagger off? OFF! ALWAYS OFF AT YOUR AGE!!!
If you can bare it, check out the video (above). But if you ask us, you'd be better off spending the three and half minutes praying that the next generation learn how to make fire and construct a wheel. We're sliding back into the Dark Ages - and FAST!
P.S. - We don't blame little Madison for this travesty. We blame her parents! Why would you subject your adorable, innocent child to this???