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And Now, The Ark Music Factory Presents…

| Filed under: Music MinuteSad Sad

Their latest attempt to recapture the magic of Rebecca Black. (FYI - It's still not working!)

It seems the Ark Music Factory hasn't learned from it's mistakes and is STILL trying to make a mega-super-awesome-cha-ching act of some poor, young "artists" who want to be the next Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber. Their latest act, Kelsey and Jack, just released their first video, Hold Me (above) and like the rest of Ark's acts, they're nothing to write about.

True, tween girls would probably really adore this Jack kid, with his surfer smile and Edward Cullen haircut. And yes, this Kelsey chick has some potential to sell crappy clothes to the masses of 9-14 girls who are searching for a new idol. But the thing is … they can't sing! There's enough autotune in this video to make Lil' Wayne cringe and cover his ears. And the song? Atrocious!

Oh, and don't even get us started on Jack "playing the guitar." Waste of a perfectly good instrument!

Still, if we are placing blame and getting these kids' hopes up, than the fault lies with those parents of theirs. At the end of the day, if they don't make it big, their dreams are dash and Ark Music is $2,000+ richer. So really, who is the fool in all this!

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20 comments to “And Now, The Ark Music Factory Presents…”

  1. 1

    It's ALL auto-tuned; my dog can sing this using auto-tune…….DESPERATE & PATHETIC!

    This is what America gets with all the budget cuts to school music program!

  2. 2

    Granted I only made it to the 30 second mark but that sucks ass! Who the hell wrote that shit/ These two cant sing worth a damn!!!!!

  3. 3

    Pretty d-mn sad. I hate this sh—y Ark Music Factory!

  4. 4

    it definitly sucks but not as bad as that creepy guy you thought you could make a star.. what was its name…you looked pretty foolish yourself promoting that twit.That guy was truly awful to listen to…

  5. 5

    sliimy - that was his name…pfft

  6. 6

    we cant even hear their real voices in it…. could anyone think of less original and inspired lyrics??? jesus, who would listen to this crap!!!

  7. 7

    "and like the rest of Ark's acts, they're nothing to write about"

    I wonder if you even appreciate the irony of that.

    In any case, it's a bit later for you to start pretending to have musical taste, considering the crap music you constantly push on here.

  8. 8

    W. T. F. is this.

  9. 9

    If I'm not mistaken but wasn't Perez the one just crazy about Friday and Rebecca Black?

  10. ASwag says – reply to this


    Interestingly enough, this one is a cover of a song that was pretty popular on the Contemporary Christian Charts. ("Hold Me" by Jamie Grace — Google it.)

    At least Ark wrote 'Friday.' Looks like now they're autotuning kids and putting them against fun backdrops while they cover songs.

  11. 11

    I dont think its that bad! if you take in consideration other crap music its not in the bottom, and look at T-Pain, king of auto tune and nobody tells him a thing… so f*ck off :)

  12. 12

    I don't think Ark is really about finding new big stars. It's just a little vanity project so kids can have the experience of doing something cool, the parents get a cute video they can send round the family. I don't think the people involved are chasing fame anymore than the average person. These kids certainly don't deserve the flack they get and I don't think its ok to be mean to children or their parents like this.

  13. 13

    You could have just ignored these kids, instead of drawing attention to them and pointing out their flaws to thousands :\

  14. 14

    I played Rebeeca Black's Friday for my ESL students because I thought the lyrics were clear and easy to understand (plus I thought it was funny) and they thought that the song was no shittier than the crap you get on the radio nowadays - and when i thought about it - i agreed

  15. 15

    Its not that bad, I think its okay and it was way better the Friday!

  16. 16

    LOL why do I suspect that you have beef with ARK? Did u ask to be paid to plug their new acts and they refused? Huh? and everything u slagged this for applied to Rebecca black too so I dont get your point.

  17. 17

    this is a very very beautiful christian song by JAMIE GRACE - HOLD ME

  18. 18

    The funny thing is, They aren't even with Ark Music Factory. They actually only asked kelsey and jack if they could put their video up so they could "get more views". To be honest, Perez has no idea what he's talking about. And I'm SHOCKED that he said Kelsey can't sing…… I've known her for a while now and she's legitimately a brilliant soprano. So let's get one thing straight, Kelsey Smith can fucking sing like a beast and don't forget it okay? :)

  19. 19

    this is absolute shit.
    Pure auto-tune.
    They can't even lip-sing.
    The "puppy love" seems forced.
    He's not even playing the acoustic guitar..not even pretending to try to play it.
    Why are they singing about in love at that age? (awkward and makes no sense, should be focused on school and hanging out with friends).
    Plus Miley Cyrus, Justin Beiber, Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, Jonas brothers, etc… ARE ALL PURE SHIT AND SHOULD NEVER HAVE BEEN FAMOUS IN THE FIRST PLACE :/

  20. 20

    Okay, Perez I love you , dont get me wrong.
    But Jack is a really good friend of mine since I was little and what your saying about him is ridiculous.
    First, this isnt even Ark Music Factory ! Its two friends who made a home made music video. 'Edward Cullen' thats a poor judgement. They're barley 15 Perez ! Ive personally heard both of them sing, they sound REALLY good. They arent auto-tuned cause they want to be! Stop comparing them , and just leave them alone. Honestly !