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Elton John Calls Madge The C-Word!

| Filed under: MadonnaCelebrity FeudsElton JohnLady GaGaGolden Globes

Elton John Calls Madge The C-Word!

OooOOoooOoh wow!

Sir Elton John has NOT been acting very Knightly towards his old enemy, her majesty Madonna.

The feud between the two got a little intense back in February when the Rocket Man wished her well with "Lip-Syncing" her Super Bowl performance, annnd then, things heated up again over their dueling Golden Globe nominations. But there is nothing passive aggressive about his most recent blow to the Queen of Pop!

In response to Madge's less-than-encouraging comments towards his good pal Lady Gaga, Elton told an Aussie reporter:

“Why is she such a nightmare? Sorry, her career is over. Her tour has been a disaster and it couldn't happen to a bigger c**t.”

Elton goes on to suggest that Madonna has lost any authority to criticise others because she’s lost credibility as an artist:

“If Madonna had any common sense she would have made a record like Ray Of Light and stayed away from the dance stuff and just been a great pop singer and make great pop records, which she does brilliantly. But no, she had to go and prove… she looks like a f*cking fairground stripper. She's been horrible to Gaga.”

Sounds like someone is a little bitter about his bikini body! LOLz!

Srsly though, both Madge and Elton are AMAZING musicians! Why can they just get along???

Both ladies (but mainly Elton) need to let the dramaz go, and focus on making music!

[Image via WENN / Ramey Pix.]

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96 comments to “Elton John Calls Madge The C-Word!”

  1. TinaFeySucks says – reply to this


    He makes some good points.

  2. 2

    I can't stand either one of them - both are classless bimbos. The only difference is that Elton attacks overtly while Madonna does it covertly.

  3. 3

    now how would madonna "let it go" when she never has even said anything mean about that fat ass. he keeps using her name for publicity. i love how there is a small group of people who are so jealous of her that they keep slagging her off as a no talent when madonna is still selling out stadiums and elton can't even see his dik with his gunt hanging over. fuck him madonna will "die another day"

  4. 4

    Partially because he is right and partially because he is gay. And we all know how gays like to make trouble from nothing. I mean look at Mario.

  5. 5

    He is right! Her new album is awful! I miss 80s/90s Madonna. I think 80s/90s Madonna would have kicked current Madonna's ass if she knew.

  6. 6

    I agree that Madonna looks like a fairground stripper, and that she should stay away from dance music. She may be a c**t, but Elton is a bigger one for saying so.

  7. 7

    Anything for a buck….

  8. marcella says – reply to this


    Can you call it a feud when is one sided?? For all the hateful thing Elton John has said about Madonna, she has not said a single thing about him…Maybe that's what's irritating him…Madonna just ignores him…And for being a has been, Madonna's tour has made 85mil dollars in 2 months, if he measures failure with that rule then I want to fail like Madonna!!!

  9. Jham says – reply to this


    Good night! What did that lady do to him?

  10. isak says – reply to this


    elton needs to pay more attention to his carrer or whats left of it he is living on past hits while madonna love her or hate her is still producing new hot music , elton wishes he can have the balls madonna has !

  11. 11

    Is this fat old queen still spewing hate? Caca blatantly ripped off Express Yourself, and I thought that what Madonna said about it was actually rather tactful. I'm guessing that Elton John is still bitter about Madonna winning that award that he wanted so badly. Once upon a time Madonna was better than she is now, but though she's sliding, she's still better than Elton John. And at least she doesn't act like an angry, drunk drag queen in a bar brawl. The guy has zero class. Maybe that's what happens when you're washed up?

  12. 12

    Elton is bullying Madonna like most of low lives heterosexuals bullying gay people.
    Time to really grow up Elton , She is not your cup of tea, move on !

  13. 13

    Ahh, nothing like a couple of old queens going at it.

  14. whoa says – reply to this


    No woman should be called the c-word…ever…I like Elton, but he has gone too far…Madonna is not as good as she used to be, but I will not slam her because of her age…men much older than her are still performing and do not criticized…it is sexist and not cool to attack women for doing so….Lady Gaga is clearly more talented than Madonna…it has been that way from the beginning…just let both exist…Lady GAGA rules and nothing will change that…I do like how Elton is loyal to GAGA, but he does not need to be so caddy about it…he is a snippy queen afterall….

  15. Kiss my ass says – reply to this


    what a douchebag…

  16. 16

    He's totally right. Madonna had evolved at her, "Ray of Light," stage. I could respect her as a woman and a mother. Now, she's acting like a trashy ho, and her new music sucks.

  17. Sophie P says – reply to this


    Elton John is an amazing! Madonna desperately wants the love and fame she had in the 90's she hasnt done herself any favours with her new album…And bitchy comments about gaga! Madonna is just jel of gaga.

  18. dangerwilrobinson says – reply to this


    How exactly is Madonna a musician? She writes lyrics and sings. A guitar tech plays her guitar part from offstage. I have friends who are great guitarists and they have watched her "play." Elton is just defending his friend. Granted he's doing it over and over and over again, but who cares? Comparing them as musicians is just plain blasphemous. Elton is an AMAZING pianist. Madonna sort of plays guitar. However, Perez has his head up Madonna's ass and not Elton's so Madonna willl alway sget the compliment from him. Kiss ass.

  19. 19

    Let;'s see Elton John is by far exceptionally talented. Madonna not so much. Saw both live.. What Madonna has is exceptional promoting skills, good tunes (written by others. NO COMPARISON.

  20. Josh says – reply to this


    Re: betterthenyou2
    He only brought her name up because he was asked about her during the interview.

  21. 21

    Re: TinaFeySucks – YES INDEED

  22. GLJ says – reply to this


    Just because Madonna slaps on a guitar as a concert prop and strums a few chords, that does not make her a musician.

  23. 23

    The only one feuding is Elton John. Madonna doesn't even respond back to him, she's a bigger person, and obviously with a bigger and more successful career than her. What does Elton do nowadays besides go on trips with younger gay couples and their children? If the woman wants to look a certain way, let her. He needs to fix his image, personally. He gives gay men and any man a bad name for constantly picking on a woman.

  24. 24

    Meow, Elton! Not that I disagree with him, but I wonder what bee got into his bonet. *LOL*

  25. Ko Ko says – reply to this


    They are both monsters.
    PH, I've been following you from almost the beginning…..this could have been your future (anger and hate) BUT look @ you now, full of love. For what it is worth- you're an inspiration to me. :)

  26. 26

    Madonna needs a reality check and I'm glad that somebody like Elton John has the courage to do so. Well put Elton, I'm not a huge fan of his but I loved him for that.

  27. TinyDancer says – reply to this


    Re: MikelJoshua
    " What does Elton do nowadays besides go on trips with younger gay couples and their children?"
    And what's so wrong with that?

  28. 28

    Elton is So Right!! She has lost it and she is whoring herself on stage to gain any remaining attention that she can muster. Retire with some dignity Madge. She should be able to respect the artists of today and still be proud of her own past accomplishments. Say goodbye….

  29. Wrenn says – reply to this


    He's 100% right.

  30. 30

    I love it. Elton doesn't annoy me that much so this is pure comedy to me.

  31. 31

    ::Srsly though, both Madge and Elton are AMAZING musicians!::

    Wrong again Dude!!!

    Elton is a "musician"

    Madonna is a singer / lip syncher

  32. shadowplay says – reply to this


    Madonna has the guts to push the boundaries of her art with her political. religious stances seen in her concerts. Elton has played it safe & is obviously jealous, & jealous he lost the Golden Globe to Madonna. Elton has forgotten that Lady Gaga blatanly ripped off one or more of Madonna's songs without so much as any financial compensation. So if Madonna criticizes Gaga she has every right to. Grow up Elton especially if you want to be a role model as a father.

  33. August says – reply to this


    Re: Sophie P – How could Madonna be jealous of Gaga?? If it weren't for Madonna there would be no Gaga.

  34. 34

    well is she living in a time warp? so much can be said for a woman that ACTS HER AGE. that ship has sailed. her music is aimed at 20 yr olds! 'Gimmie all your love'??? GIMME A BREAK. Confessions and Hard Candy should have been it…b/c it's getting old now. as old as she is.

  35. 35

    Re: shadowplay – You're confusing Madonna's "guts" with "desperation".

  36. 36

    Re: whoa – "No woman should ever be called the c-word"
    Well why not? Why can men be called that but not women? Equal rights, remember? So either the c-word for all or none. It shouldn't be a gender based curse word. Anyone can be a c-word, why should women get a pass?
    Also, the c-word has a different meaning in other places like Australia, England, Ireland, New Zealand. So it clearly has different meaning where Elton is from. He's not being noce, but it's not as bad of a word as it is in America.

  37. sayit says – reply to this


    He should this much effort into not looking like a disgusting pig

  38. Saint Thomas says – reply to this


    lol from all the people on earth, Elton John criticizing Madonna's looks! it doesn't make sense… like "she looks like a fairground stripper"….. then he's besties with Gaga… irony!!! also better to look like a stripper than a weird looking swine…. and how is her a tour a disaster?? it's been selling out all the venues and the critics and fans wont stop praising it…

  39. 39

    If Gaga was constantly stealing from Elton, I'm sure he would feel differently. Elton is just bitter because he's no longer relevant, his career is now to the point where he does a song or two on a soundtrack and that is it. His one sided feud with Madonna goes back a LONG time. He's jealous of her career and the fact that homosexuals have always been more into her music than his. Her career is anything but over, her shows are selling out everywhere she goes.

  40. 40

    Madonna is not a musician lets get that straight. Madonna is a c***. I find her disgusting, flashing her tis on stage still, it is so sad and desperate. She has not had a popular song since she ripped off, oops i mean sampled Abba to get attention. Madonna has no real talent. She sounds like she is choking when she sings live. She hardly ever sings, its always lip syncing. I saw the interview and everything Elton said was true. Madonna has been awful to Gaga when she should have been more matured and supported her. Gaga has never said a bad thing about Mandonna but Mandonna continuously is rude about her. That shows Madonnas personality. I am not a huge Gaga fan but i find her more appealing and talented than Madonna ever has been. Get over Madonna Perez, you are never going to get new fans for her. Her fans are all old people who loved her in the 80s. When you see clips from her concert they are all old people in their 30's 40's and 50's. I do not care if she has been around for 30 years or what ever. She should have went out on top instead of this embarrassing tour and getting booed by her fans, who she said were thugs who were not really her fans LMAO What thug whould waste that much money to boo someone. It was her fans LOL

  41. 41

    Re: Meggie246524 – no. lollll i think you've been confusing ”guts” with ”desperation” most of your life, megster! we get it, you hate strong women. hmmmm ;-)

  42. 42

    Re: ickynicky – exactly. love you! it's a totally one-sided feud. poor elton and his two inch nub. he's sooooooooooooooooooo bitter! lol!

  43. 43

    Re: Michael Imperfect Angel – that was one long run-on comment!! geez, you sound so pissed off… like you're on the verge of tears!! please relax and take life a little easier. madonna don't know anything ’bout you!! :-) she's the honey badger queen bitch — don't know you, don't give a shit about u!!

  44. Matt says – reply to this



  45. IckyNickyIsStupid says – reply to this


    Re: ickynicky
    "his career is now to the point where he does a song or two on a soundtrack"
    And what is so wrong with that? It's called retirement, dear. He works when he wants to, not because he has to. And I seriously doubt he's worried about "the homosexuals" being his core audience.

  46. 46

    there's some really strange rivalry between these two. I know that she can be a really big bitch sometimes, but something about the way he attacks her always seems off to me. i saw a youtube video of him with her at something backstage somewhere, and he seemed really manipulative and obnoxious with her. i love a lot of his music, but he really seems to show that he comes from a much lower sort of ugly and hating place. i find that behavior kind of gross. Even when she's a bitch sometimes there seems like there's still a lot of intelligence and rational thinking happening. - or tounge in cheek humor.

  47. 47

    I love it when Elton goes on one of his tirades!!! He's an Aries so he's going to speak before he thinks when his anger is strong enough.

  48. 48

    "Fairground stripper" ahh, classic!

  49. 49

    The only thing hes right about is her music but the JEALOUS queen is wrong about her career. Its not like it was in the 80's 90's but at 54 shes still selling more records and concert than he is.and as for her calling out gaga for ripping her off Im glad that made me love her more. The Queen Elton is just jealous of Madonna and it makes him look so deserate. to bad for him shes going to win again because she may break her own concert records. Elton STFU because your the one with the dying career.

  50. Genesis says – reply to this


    Elton John may be a little too extreme in his criticism of her, but he does have a point. She USED to make great records. Now it sounds like she's trying to sound like the very ones she influenced. And for someone who gets on her soapbox during her shows & preaches tolerance, she sure seems to show a lot of disdain toward her fans, first telling them her high ticket prices are worth it, and then labeling some of her fans as thugs, while she's passive-aggressively bullying pop stars young enough to be her daughter.
    And to people saying Elton hasn't had a hit in decades, how absurd! He just had a #1 album in the UK, and has been having gold and platinum records spanning 4 decades now. Just because you don't hear him on the radio next to fuckin' Katy Perry, it doesn't mean he's not doing well for himself these days.

  51. 51

    Re: Matt – eltie is such a fat old hasbeen!! you know he's always wanted to be a woman!! this is pure vagina envy!! :-)

  52. 52

    Re: Genesis – lolllllllllllllllllllll!! yeah, i think he just played to 3,000 fans recently!! sorry goober but elton is beyond finished and is very, very bitter. not to mention, really really fat. sorry. ;-)

  53. 53

    Re: canuckistani – i just can't get the image of his two inch nub outta my head!! :-) the guy is grotesque!! it's a pity he keeps on engaging in this one-sided feud. sad really.

  54. 54

    Re: fuck the haters – he's obsessed. no doubt. he wants to be her. a very bitter old man with a two inch nub. what's great about this ”feud” is that it's totally one-sided. elton has always wanted a vagina and this is PURE VAGINA ENVY!! lolllllllllllllllll :-)

  55. Genesis says – reply to this


    Re: FatAzzPooHeadDoodle
    3000 fans? That's impressive. Seeing that's 3000 more that would ever come see your tired ass.

  56. Victoria says – reply to this


    First of all, she's right about Lady Gaga, she copies from Madonna all the way and she thinks she's 100 percent original. Lady Gaga needs to get her own original and creative ideas. Madonna has been working and doing more than Elton and her new album became a hit. Elton is just jealous of Madonna because she has a vagina unlike him and she's not fat. Elton, get that tight tiara out of your mind and hit the treadmill por favor.

  57. 57

    Re: Genesis – sounds like i stung ya!! lolllll!! yep, 3,000 fans!! poor eltie!! hard times baby boo!! :-)

  58. 58

    Re: Victoria – BEST COMMENT EVER!!!! elton totally wishes he has a vagina!!!! xo

  59. Genesis says – reply to this


    Re: FatAzzPooHeadDoodle
    Stung me? With what? And where did you get your 3000 fans info? The Examiner? Yeah, such a reliable source for Madonna Stans. Just last year, he played to 36K in Madison Square Garden. Yeah, his career is SO over.

  60. VictoriaSuckNubs says – reply to this


    Re: Victoria
    And you think Madonna is 100% original? Give me the name of your dealer, because I want what you've been smoking. You can't steal from someone what wasn't theirs in the first place.

  61. 61

    Elton should just give up. As for Madonna, she did slap Gaga's wrist for the song but it's about time because she's been around long enough to earn that right. I'm just surprised Gaga hasn't faced any major lawsuits yet. She can sing and draw attention to herself but to say she's original, then you haven't listened to music in the 80s and 90s. Her fans are younger so not surprised they don't think she actually copied anyone.
    People who can sue Gaga:
    1) Madonna - Born this way.
    2) Eurythmics - Dance in the dark.
    3) Ace of Base - Alejandro
    4) RuPaul - Scheibe

    Okay, let all the hate replies begin!

  62. 62

    The 'old show my naked body ploy is the art of misdirection, all illusionists employ it. Madonna was once very good, but is she topping the charts, or chopping the arts?? I think Elton has it right.

  63. 63

    I feel so strongly about this that I feel the need to comment again.

    We WERE so easily led when we let her in our head.

    You know, I watched two to three Marilyn Monroe classic movies this past weekend. She knew the art of "suggestion" and knew when to emply it to emphacize the interpretation of the lyrics and to tell the story in song without actually popping out body parts. I think that the art of mystic and mystery is a lost art.
    Madge, you SUCK at it! Nipples put prepubescent teens in the seats and that's about it. Maybe your intent is to drop the age of your boy toys to peach fuzz age. Reeks of d-e-s-p-e-r-a-t-I-o-n!

  64. 64

    Re: Genesis – sounds like you have vagina envy too!! lollllllllllllllllllllllllll u and elton should start a tiny club!!!! :-)

  65. 65

    Re: VictoriaSuckNubs – what are u talking about? we're talking about the one-sided feud AND eltie's dream to one day have his very own vagina!! lollllllllllllllll

  66. 66

    Re: In Theory – lollllllll u just sound CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAZZZZZZYYYY!! lmfaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!! i'm actually afraid of u!!!!! very serial killerish!!! yikes!!

  67. Genesis says – reply to this


    Re: FatAzzPooHeadDoodle
    Perhaps you ask whether or not I have a vagina. But we all know a f.a.g. like you has never seen one since your mother gave birth to her litter.

  68. isak says – reply to this


    madonna failure i think not she is selling out stadiums , when was the last time elton did that the fact that she is still on top should be something that people applaud but people are afraid of strenght , madonna dnces like a 30 year old and makes great music never the same that is her secret !and it works keep on going madonna

  69. 69

    I've never been to a fair that has strippers. Did he take a moment to see his last Pepsi commercial? What a dumb ass!!!

  70. 70

    That's about all I have to say on this.

  71. Raphael says – reply to this


    He's such an ancient douche. She still entertains well so why not showcase it on tour? She's STILL an amazing performer and dancer. What has he been doing besides getting publicity by using her name? Focus on your career grandpa, not hers.
    P.S.-She's not being horrible to Gaga, she's just tired of the constant comparisons. Also, Gaga has "borrowed" a signifigant amount of Madonna's artistic influence so she has every right to be upset.

  72. Joey says – reply to this


    Sorry, but what you all are hating on Elton for doing (bashing Madonna and she hasn't retaliated) is exactly what Madonna has done to Gaga. And Perez, you say both ladies need to let the drama go… umm, it's only Madonna starting the drama. Gaga has been silent throughout this whole entire thing.

  73. 73

    Re: Brainiac – hooray, hooray!! more wisdom from our resident feminist!!! lolllllllllllllllllllll!!! :-)

  74. 74

    Re: Joey – yeah, silently stealing from as many pop acts as possible!!!! i think you just made my favorite observation!! r all little turds mentally challenged and fat like elton?? do you want to be a woman too?? lmfaoooooooooooooooooooo!!!

  75. 75

    Re: Raphael – love it!! spot on!!!!

  76. 76

    Re: Genesis – lollllllllllllllll!! you crack me up, tiny!! ”f.a.g”!!!! what's that mean?? friends and gamers??? fools are ghouls?? farting at gamers?? don't keep us in suspense!!!!! tell us what that means!!!!!! lmfaooooooooooooooooo!! :-)

  77. Saint Thomas says – reply to this


    I've come to realize that all Madonna haters with their comments show to be un-attractive prudes who think they're too smart for the world (LOL)… like if u don't have it and don't like to show it, don't hate on Madonna!! go buy some ice cream and cry alone, but don't spoil the party for the rest! ps: a real intellectual doesn't waste time on hating

  78. 78

    Re: Saint Thomas – VERY well said! xo

  79. Savonna says – reply to this


    Meeeouch there Sir Elton! OR she could be like you & not have a fresh hit in 20 years. I still like Madge & am over Lady Gaga quite frankly. Gaga is overrated, weak ass pop voice cannot dance (Tripped onstage 3 times in 1 night when I saw her), not attractive.
    Nikki Minaj is way better. Madonna could age a bit more appropriately but shit she is Madonna that like asking Cher to let her hair go grey.

  80. 80

    Re: Raphael – You mean GREAT Grandpa!!!

  81. 81

    Re: Sophie P – What bitchy comments? For the one statement about born this way being a reductive version of express yourself IT'S THE TRUTH! other than she has said a lot of nice things about her. I m sure she does not appreciate the constant comparisons and shitty things said about her age and talent. She did not start this cat fight but she can certainly hold her own and frankly has been pretty restrained given the awful crap people say about her.

  82. 82

    I love you, Elton! Yeah, Mario - he's jealous of Madonna's body. He has a career that is forty years strong and counting. My twelve-year-old is more mature than you, Mario.

  83. FatAzzIsAnIdiot! says – reply to this


    Re: FatAzzPooHeadDoodle
    Oh, look! A superfan! How original

  84. zephyrinthesky says – reply to this


    Re: Joey – Listen I really do admire Gaga but Its not what she has said its what shes done and also what she hasn't said. She's only regurgitated most of Madonnas body of work in one way or an other and never said thank you. To add insult to injury when she was given an award for born this way she thanked Whitney Houston????? (whom I also love) what the hell??. I think everyone should grow up and knock it off including Madonna because no matter what Elton, Gaga or any one else says about Madonna she has earned her place and her accomplishments will not be be erased by them or anyone else here.

  85. Shynna says – reply to this


    Mmmm vaya grosero!
    En mi vida he escuchado su musica, esta muy ardido, se nota lo estupido que puede llegar una persona cuando esta celosa y ardida!
    MADONNA 4ever

  86. 86

    Really it is pretty sad how pathetic Vadge the Hag looks, showing her tits, etc to stay relevant & in the news. being that shes like 65 now, I think she needs to seriously move the f*** on. No one wants to see her botoxed face anymore. And everyone knows why she wears those fingerless gloves…because theres no plastic surgery for old hands.

  87. Carl says – reply to this


    You know 2 queens just cant get along lol…Anyway Elton is a fat cow and should focus on his family and himself and should just get over himself and grow a pair. If Lady Gaga has a problem with Madonna she should be a real lady about it and address it not Elton. After all lets face it, without Madonna there would be no Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga reminds me of not just Madonna but alot of musical groups of new waves back in the 80's because they are soooo similar in some which ways and in other they are just exactly a like.

  88. Carl says – reply to this


    Re: zephyrinthesky – Aaaaamen to that. I completely agree with you on this one. And the sad part about it is that people believes everything what they hear and see on t.v. instead of putting their own way of thinking or viewing things.

  89. Juan Martinez says – reply to this


    Oh, Elton, must you always be so crotchety?? The only reason you think Madonna has been bad to Gaga is because Gaga is godmama to your baby!

    I have never heard Madonna publicly bash Elton, even when he and his partner were making digs about her chances at winning that Golden Globe. Her response was classy. And it is classy how she keeps her head up and doesn't comment to all of his other digs and disses.

    As for Gaga, sorry, but she got what she deserved (as far as Madonna commenting on her work, and actually, I thought Madonna showed restraint). Gaga had totally been swiping fashion and music from Madonna. And Madonna is not the only one who is irritated by that. Google Grace Jones' opinions on Gaga. Little Monster Mama is indeed talented, but read what her former choreographer had to say about things — that Madonna should be mad, that they totally hijacked things from her.

    I think that an artist has to find their own way, and one has to be a little more self-aware if they are emulating others too much, otherwise they become an amalgamation of other artists without their own true identity. That is what Gaga is. An amalgamation of past artists that she snatched from to appeal to the masses.

    And Elton needs to show some class and stop bashing Madonna in public. Lame and in poor taste, Elton.

  90. 90

    silly old queen.
    irrelevant…just like the godmother to his little love child, gaga.

  91. June says – reply to this


    Eltons son keeps asking 'why dont i have a mommy?' so sad.

  92. 92

    Re: VadgeIsAHag – your profile picture…your username…it all references madonna!! your life is all about madonna!! AND you hate her????? lmfaoooooooooooooo!! an obsessed self-loather!!!! I LOVE ITTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!! :-) #crazy

  93. Godwin says – reply to this


    Re: zephyrinthesky
    To add insult to injury? Who was injured? You? Madonna? LG can thank whoever she hell she wants.

  94. 94

    Re: Lady Who? – Um that song he "rewrote" is one of the most successful songs in the history of music so shows what you know…What a surprise a passive-aggressive ugly middle aged woman complaining on the internet, SHOCKER!!

  95. just_sayin' says – reply to this


    Oh, Elton John. Surely you have more class than to be so callow; your disgusting comments maimed at Madonna make you look very juvenile, jealous, and very misogynistic. Madonna wouldn't lower herself in such ways.

  96. Fiorella says – reply to this


    Sir Elton!!! I agree with you!!!! That creepy old hag of MADONNA has been really unkind to Lady Gaga, and Gaga nothing!! She is a real Lady not like Madonna!! A cheap hooker!!