Just when we thought things couldn't get any worse over on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
But that wasn't the case!
The World Series is over – no idea who won BTW – so FOX can return to their regularly scheduled programming. Which really only translates to one thing for us:
GLEE IS BACK! LIFE MAKES SENSE AGAIN!
Now, as you might be aware, last night kicked of the show’s tribute to the greatest high school musical pre-Zac Efron, Grease. It was also marked the arrival of The Glee Project winner Blake Jenner and the return of fan faves Amber Riley and Harry Shum Jr.
Ready your hands to jive, y’all! Here comes our recap for The Role You Were Born to Play!
WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD! WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO BE SPOILED!? THAT’S NO FUN! WELL, ACTUALLY, IT KIND OF IS… BUT NOT FOR EVERYONE! SO IF IT’S NOT FOR YOU, AVERT DEM EYES!!!
Okay, we're forced to drop a truth bomb right now:
We didn’t love this episode.
Sure, we got to enjoy the single greatest tribute to Olivia Newton-John in musical history… but let’s be honest, Darren Criss could sing the Dewey Decibel System and we’d swoon.
No, frankly, we found the whole thing just a little fluffy, even with an ignorance bomb that’s going to have quite the fallout for one of our fave characters.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Here’s the story, morning glory:
Pity Party For One More
Blaine isn’t the only one singing the blues these days…
As McKinley starts running with Finn’s idea of doing Grease as the school musical, Finn finds himself covered in the same lubricant back at the Hummel Tire shop, after losing his girl, his military career, his pride, our attention… But lo and behold, through an act of musical terrorism, Artie gives Finn back his sense of self by enlisting him to direct the school musical.
His first task is to find a male lead. Well, where else to start looking for that than the same place Mr. Schue found him – the football team! Enter newbie Ryder, played by The Glee Project's victor. He reminds Finn a lot of himself. Actually, he reminds all of us exactly of Finn in the first two seasons. Lovable, a little dim-witted, no direction… Finn 2.0 is born. Now we've got a second generation Rachel (Marley) and a Finn! (Right, like you didn't see that coming???) But the original model still has a way to go. While Will may think Finn’s the kind of man who can handle himself (more on that in a bit), we can’t help but think Finn hasn’t grown up very much at all. Who else had visions of the infamous “faggy’ scene when he called Sue’s baby “retarded”? Sure, he apologized – but the damage is done and unlike in the past, what will come of Sue’s wrath following will be completed warranted.
Familiar Faces Get Zero Screen Time
As we mentioned, Mercedes and Mike mosey on back to McKinley to help their friends put on a show. Since they’ve left their old stomping grounds, the pair… well, actually, we have no idea what they’ve been up to. Amber Riley had like, two lines in the whole episode, none of which explained why she would drop everything in her life in L.A. to come back home. Mike and Tina had an awkward post-heartbreak scene that at least alludes to their break up being Mike’s fault – but again, we’re given very little indication as to what happened or why Mike would come back if Tina was still so mad at him. A WASTE of their talents, we say! Simply a Waste!
Let’s Put On A Show
Grease is the Glee word and while we won’t see full reenactments from the famed movie till next week, we now know who will be portraying who. Ryder and Marley land the leads Sandy and Danny, while Puck’s baby bro will stew with jealousy as Putzie. A majority of the episode was spent teetering on the decision to have Unique play Rizzo, but of course, there was no denying the girl with such undeniable talent! Blaine nabs the role of Teen Angel, the only part he feels emotionally stable enough to tackle. Sam gets to give Kenickie hickeys, while Sugar gets to drop out of Beauty School (GENIUS!). And Kitty? While she might’ve gotten some of the best one-liners in the episode, but she got saddled with a part we had to Google to actually remember, Patty Simcox. And no, we’re not going to tell you who that is. You’re on the computer – educate yourself! So, the cast is set… now we just have to see if the show will go on!
Wemma Fans Go, "Wah!"
As the only couple to survive the massacre that was The Break-Up episode, we had high hopes that these two would find some more common ground in this week. Indeed, with a little help from Finn and Dr. Beiste, Emma and Will finally decide on an arrangement: Emma will stay at her job while Will goes to Washington. There love will make it after all … and then we’ll get a wedding in February sweeps! Till then, the torch of the Glee club is now firmly in Finn’s grasp. What could go wrong with that?
Oh, we shall see!
Next week … Rachel's back! And Kurt! And Kate Hudson!
God, we wish that Ryan Murphy had just made the damn New York spin-off! Grr!
A Few Side Notes:
A. For the record, we saw you slap Amber's ass, Harry! Don't think we didn't!
B. Does Dr. Beiste make house calls? We're in need of some counseling ourselves — and we think she's just the shrink to get us back into fightin' form!
C. Okay, okay! Patty Simcox is the really prudish girl who tries to befriend Sandy before she meets the Pink Ladies. Poodle skirt, high-pitched voice… not Kitty AT ALL!