All of that money, and the bluetooth isn't hooked up.
No police caught Bruce, but cameras did, which is just as damning.
[Image via Splash News.]
WTF!!?!!?! THIS IS REAL LIFE!
Even the craziest tabloid couldn't make this sh*t up!
Lindsay Lohan has a long-lost sister, everyone! A LONG-LOST SISTER!!
For seventeen years, Kristi Horn has been adamant about Michael Lohan being the father of her love child — Ashley.
But he always denied it!!
Welp! He can't now!! Because thanks to The Trisha Goddard Show, DNA testing now proves that YES, MICHAEL — YOU ARE THE FATHER!!
Oh and speaking of wacky paternity testing, Maury even drops by to have a lil' chit-chat with the dad.
"Did you, at any time when Ashley was young, say 'I'm gonna take you to Disney World'??"
The crazy reveal airs THURSDAY NIGHT on NBC!! Set those DVRs now, people! LOL!
To soothe your anticipation though, watch the preview (above)!
Apparently there's even a part where Michael tries to console Ash, but she refuses him. So he says, "I just want to hug you!"
But clearly, as she says in the video, she doesn't wanna be a part of any Lohan drama!! And can you blame her??
And LiLo!! She's already got one half-brother on the way. What will she do now that she knows there's another bundle of beauty in the fam??
Whatever happens, we just hope Ashley can cope with the crazy news. You don't have to be a part of the drama, gurl. You can totally forge your own path!