Calum McSwiggan is adamant that he's not faking his alleged attack.
"I went to the police and now apparently I'm a criminal."
However, the police have revealed that they have video
[Image via Calum McSwiggan/Instagram.]
Unfortunately, though Evi was granted citizenship thanks to her father being born North of the Line, Randy was left out in the cold!
So now Randy Quaid is appealing. Huh. Don't get to say that every day.
"Organized crime and its victims are serious issues and can not be tossed off until the claim is heard."
Well, we suppose that's true. We've never heard of a secret anti-celebrity mafia, but better safe than sorry? They went on to say:
"The refugee claims should remain intact as should Evi and Randy Quaid’s heads remain attached to their necks and it is their firm belief that their lives are at stake and being racketeered on."
Well, apart from the weird wording and decapitation discussion, we are still talking about people who are very scared. So we guess it's not that weird.
But they weren't done. They said:
"The Quaids claim is not Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle. Evi and Randy Quaids lives are in danger here! Evi and Randy Quaid have been subjected to an injustice."
We guess they– maybe they mean– Um…
OK, we have no idea what they mean about Harold And Kumar! Do they even have White Castle in Canada? What does that mean??
We're not sure sounding crazy on paper is the best way to convince someone to let you in.
[Image via Anthony G. Moore/WENN.]