It's official! After fans have asked the right f*cking questions for months about who would star in the next season of True Detective, we finally have our answer!
The amount of horror stories we hear about cruises seem to outweigh those from people who actually had an amazing time on them! In fact, even stories about people just being super bored outweigh those who've had fun!
So, we must ask (before we get into the grossness): Why does anyone want to take a cruise??
As of right now, there are passengers stranded on the Carnival Triumph cruise ship. They've become physically sick (not just from your normal bout of viruses that spread on these floating petri dishes), because conditions are THE WORST EVER.
'The facilities overflow and the unbearable stench of human waste and lack of food supplies [is taking] its toll.'
So what happened? There was an engine fire that stranded them in the Gulf of Mexico. Now, they're taking the long-ass journey to Mobile, Alabama. How long? Well, how long does it take a tiny tugboat to pull a giant cruise ship overflowing with extra human waste??
About that long!
Some passengers have been able to call and text out about the rooms leaking raw sewage and asking why they can't just be evacuated off the boat. Probably because there are 4,200 people aboard!
The cabin carpets are apparently DRENCHED in urine, and people have been sleeping in tents on deck to avoid the rivers of poop and the fact that there's no air condition, because that broke too. Fights have broken out over food (cold onion sandwiches, anyone?), and the elderly are running out of meds. Formula and diaper supplies are scarce, too.
There has to be a better solution to this problem!
Oh yeah — don't go on cruises! LOLz!!
We hope everyone makes it back safe and sound!
[Image via AP Images.]