Well, if she's gonna turn to anyone, we totally expect it to be the "consciously uncoupling" star!
Because, DUH! Who better to understand Beyoncé's pain than the Goop author?!
Even if this one ends up saturated in freckles, booze and tiger blood!
As we all know by now, it appears that Charlie Sheen has taken a liking to his Scary Movie 5 co-star Lindsay Lohan, as he's not only gifted her $100,000 to cover her troubles with the IRS, but offered to pay for her amfAR Gala gown and given her work as a guest star on his FX series Anger Management!
Given their long list of well-documented personal and legal troubles, it's no surprise that these two can relate to each other, but now, the MaSheen is hoping to take their relationship one step further…by offering to be the hard-pAArtying starlet's MENTOR, in order to guide her back into a professionally successful and ideally-drama-free lifestyle!
"I have a kinship with somebody [Lindsay] who clearly needs a mentor, whether she wants one or not. She can continue to hang out with her dress shredding club buddies, or turn to me for some advice from a guy who's been down the road as well as every other side trail on the journey. If she listens, she'll win. If she doesn't, that's on her. I love her, I respect her, and I've never laid a finger on her that wasn't on film. How ya like me now, America?"
HA! Well, Charlie, we like you just fine!
And frankly, we think that if anyone can get through to her and set her as close to the straight-and-narrow as she'll ever feasibly get, HE at least has a better chance than her destructive parents OR her fool of a lawyer, Mark Heller!
We suggest you take this offer and consider it LONG and HARD, Lindsay!
There's very few people left who think trying to help you isn't a massive waste of time and energy!
Fingers crossed that you make the right choice!
[Images via WENN.]