Umm, this is NOT what we were expecting from TLC.
Check out the official statement (below)!
[Image via TLC.]
We didn't see this one coming!!
We always assumed the legally challenged LiLo picked Mark "Incompetent" Heller because of his legal skills! Or Yelp reviews!
Or because she found a two-for-one coupon in the Sunday paper!
Or maybe Lindsay Lohan woke up in his bathtub one morning after a night of binge drinking and thought, "this guy will do!"
It turns out she had different reasons entirely! She had a pre-existing relationship with Mark's son Mike Heller (pictured above with a hat about bananas and someone who suspiciously looks like Avril Lavigne, LOLz)!
We know what you're thinking, but it isn't that kind of relationship! At least not as far as we know, LOLz!!
Mike doesn't make weekly man-sausage deposits at her Vagina Credit Union, he actually stuffs real green cash-monies into her checking account!
He gets her jobs!
"Mike books gigs for Lindsay and they've known each other for a long time. She's not likely to part ways with his father [attorney Mark Heller] anytime soon, because of her strong ties to his son. Without brand promotion, Lindsay would be in a lot deeper financial trouble."
We'll we're glad he's helping her make some dough… even if it means she has to give it right back to Daddy-O.
Rumor has it Mike's company Talent Resources even secured Lindz the super-quick jet that allowed her to make her Monday courtroom appearance
on time only 48 minutes late!
He won't spill the worms, though — Mike only said:
"I can't comment on that [juicy rumor.] All her deals are confidential."
If nothing else, it sounds like the Mean Girls starlet and the Hellers have more than a few deep ties they won't be cutting anytime soon!
See a pic of Mike lounging in the jet he probably used to take LiLo to court (below)!