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Gay Man Dragged Away From Partner's Hospital Bed Because Missouri Doesn't Recognize Civil Unions

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gay man lovers side hospital handcuffed dragged away missouri sad same sex marriage

Reason #72,831 why all couples in love should be afforded the right to marry:

Police were called when Roger Gorley refused to leave the bedside of his sick partner, Allen, in a Missouri hospital on Tuesday — cops sided with Allen's family because he and Roger were unmarried.

The cops put Roger in handcuffs, escorted him off the hospital grounds, and even issued a restraining order against him — all because he wanted to be near the man he's been in a civil union with for five years.

Roger and Allen even filled out paperwork legally allowing them to make medical decisions for one another, but none of those documents mattered when Allen's family and the hospital forced Roger to leave.

After being dragged from his lover's bed, Roger sadly admitted:

“I was not recognized as being the husband, I wasn’t recognized as being the partner. [The nurse] didn’t even bother to go look [the Power of Attorney paperwork] up to check into it."

Ugh! This is so so so very sad, but not at all shocking! If Missouri recognized same-sex marriages, this never could've happened!

Research Medical Center only issued this lame statement:

"We believe involving the family is an important part of the patient care process. And, the patient`s needs are always our first priority. When anyone becomes disruptive to providing the necessary patient care, we involve our security team to help calm the situation and to protect our patients and staff. If the situation continues to escalate, we have no choice but to request police assistance."

Meh.

Every person deserves the right to stay by their soulmate's side in sickness and in health.

Allen clearly wanted his partner in that hospital room, that's why they filled out legal documents which were supposed to prevent a homophobic family member or some cruel nurse from standing between them!!

Sadly, all the legal documents in the world didn't matter. Power of Attorney forms don't hold a candle to something as symbolically important as a wedding ring.

Until same-sex marriage is readily accepted in every single state, bigots and homophobes in positions of power will continue squashing the rights of same-sex lovers whenever they can!!

And it makes us sick!!

Our hearts go out to the loving couple; hopefully Allen makes a speedy recover with Roger right by his side.

[Image via Facebook.]

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37 comments to “Gay Man Dragged Away From Partner's Hospital Bed Because Missouri Doesn't Recognize Civil Unions”



  1. 1

    We appreciate your concern and would like to assure you that Research Medical Center puts the care of our patients as our #1 priority regardless of sexual orientation. We support all the communities we serve. We have a long history of commitment to a culture of diversity. Research Medical Center was one of the first hospitals in Kansas City to offer domestic partner benefits, which have been in place since 2005, and we have had a policy specifically acknowledging domestic partners’ visitation rights in place for years.

    This was an issue of disruptive and belligerent behavior by the visitor that affected patient care. The hospital’s response followed the same policies that would apply to any individual engaged in this behavior in a patient care setting and was not in any way related to the patient’s or the visitor’s sexual orientation or marital status. This visitor created a barrier for us to care for the patient. Attempts were made to deescalate the situation. Unfortunately, we had no choice but to involve security and the Kansas City MO Police Department.

    We would also like to correct the misinformation about a restraining order. There was no issue of a restraining order by the hospital.



  2. 2

    The law is the law!



  3. 3

    Re: Kandee43 – The law is retarded. You should be able to have anyone you want by your side in the hospital, I don't care what the relationship is. You can set anyone you like as your emergency contact, you should be able to do the same thing with situations like this. I'm not talking about a gay/straight thing here, just in general, it's a stupid rule.



  4. 4

    2 sides
    one while its a disgrace not to acknowldeg him as a partner or husband if he is one

    two sometimes even bf gf cant be at the bedside becuase its next of kin only

    unless the guy was about to die there is no reasont o be there 24/7 let the hospital do its job ..



  5. 5

    This is terrible. However, how do you go from "all should get married" to "wedding rings are only symbolic" in the same story. I believe all people should have the right to marry, but either marriage is meaningful or its "just symbolic."



  6. 6

    so wrong. It sounds like the family are not thinking of their son's choices. when is the USA going to get in line for basic rights. Oh that's right most are still in line buying guns

  7. truth says – reply to this


    7

    wow, your article is so poor and misleading. You omitted the full truth to try and achieve a more sensational article. Research Medical Center posted a statement, yet you only copied PART of the statement… to try and inflate an issue that simply isn't there. You don't say how this man was causing a huge scene and behaving inappropriately. The hospital did NOT ask him to leave because he wasn't the power of attorney. CHECK YOUR FACTS PEREZ! DON'T YOU DARE CALL THE NURSES CRUEL!!!

    FULL Statement:
    “Research Medical Center was one of the first hospitals in Kansas City to offer domestic partner benefits, which have been in place since 2005, and we have had a policy specifically acknowledging domestic partners’ visitation rights in place for years.
    This was an issue of disruptive and belligerent behavior by the visitor that affected patient care. The hospital’s response followed the same policies that would apply to any individual engaged in this behavior in a patient care setting and was not in any way related to the patient’s or the visitor’s sexual orientation or marital status. This visitor created a barrier for us to care for the patient. Attempts were made to deescalate the situation. Unfortunately, we had no choice but to involve security and the Kansas City MO Police Department.”

  8. Lulu says – reply to this


    8

    You don't know the full story of what happened. You weren't there and you spin the story for your own agenda, like calling the nurse cruel for doing her job.



  9. 9

    sounds like there is a whole lot missing from your lousy reporting.

  10. PixieGreenEyes says – reply to this


    10

    That's a shame. How could a civil document not suffice?



  11. 11

    That is so awful!



  12. 12

    Re: AttFinch
    Mmm, so it appears there is more to this story. Perez, you are a DISGRACE to the gay community…hence, why gay men like me and the rest..DO NOT WANT YOU!

  13. Truth532 says – reply to this


    13

    Either Perez is an idiot, a liar, or the most irresponsible blogger on the web. Read the facts STUPID. The hospital kicked him out for belligerent behavior that was interfering with patient care. It had nothing to do with sexual orientation. They would have done the same thing if a family member or legal spouse acted the same way. No restraining exists order either. This is par for the course for Perez. I am sick of reading his false and misleading propaganda.

  14. Mr Pete says – reply to this


    14

    If this story is accurate (which I doubt) and Roger Gorley had the legal right to make medical decisions for partner, had the signed documents with him, and the hospital had him removed by police escort,
    I would say Mr Gorley has a good lawsuit against the hospital, the staff and the police
    But if this is another half baked , half fact / half fiction story for you to once again show how gays are always victims
    I would hope the hospital, the staff, and the police, turn around and sue you for publishing false and malicious gossip



  15. 15

    I live here! This story never made the news. I know this Hospital. Sad if that really did happen.



  16. 16

    The Law is the Law. Gays are not above the Law..DEAL WIT IT!



  17. 17

    Here's what I read (though may be wrong). the family was visiting with their relative and this guy came in and they asked him to leave - I'm guessing they wanted to time alone with their loved one but this guy refused. He's not on his death bed geez.

  18. GaybyGod says – reply to this


    18

    Re: Kandee43 – After reading the hospital's response, I can see why he was escorted out. Your comment "the law is the law" leaves little space for understanding and compassion. It was once a law that people of different races couldn't get married, which was based on fear and ignorance. I'm sure that a few people then shared your sentiments. Hopefully we will be lifted out of this ancient "judgmental, discriminatory practice" soon.

  19. Jasonb84 says – reply to this


    19

    Missouri is well known for its hate towards gays and lesbians, so I would not be surpised if the story is true.

  20. Jasonb84 says – reply to this


    20

    Re: spazster – Back in 2010, President Barack Obama ordered all hospitals receiving Medicare and Medicaid payments to allow patients to determine who has visitation rights and who can make medical decisions. This right, extended to gay and lesbian partners, is supposed to give designated persons the same rights as immediate family. The law is the law.



  21. 21

    wow can they be sued for ignoring the power of attorney paperwork??



  22. 22

    WAIT, LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT… a gutter-dwelling leech like Perez only gave part of the story? Shocker! Not. Perez can't even spell correctly most of the time. What a douche.

  23. mktb says – reply to this


    23

    How about asking the fucking PATIENT what he wants? His family is so fucking selfish and should all be slapped in the face.

  24. Restmom says – reply to this


    24

    I live here in K.C. and contrary to what the hospital says I've heard of problems like this at Research Med.before.This might just be the case of one nurse with an agenda though.Missouri can be a very socially ugly state.



  25. 25

    Sad, sad, sad!!! Why can't everybody just get along…especially at times of adversity.

  26. Devynn says – reply to this


    26

    I live here and what Perez has reported, has been reported by a lot of other outside media outlets. None of the major ones have said a word. And that full BLANKET statement is par for the course for hospitals, but Research is KNOWN for terrible patient care and treatment of patient's families.

  27. mia says – reply to this


    27

    Re: truth – But I am pretty sure the Hospital has their own spin of what happened. Are we seriously to believe that the hospital would actually admit to this. If you actually believe the hospital would come out and tell the truth you are in denial.



  28. 28

    my, oh my, can't Believe how many homophobic comments there are. Well, it is Mo. after all…. The Cultural WasteLands.

    Bunch of backwards peons in here. Get an education, have a little understanding of history, then you might realize how barbaric and disgusting any society is that does not recognize and honor gay rights.

    and for those of you who are married; ask yourself if you take that Privilege for granted.

    Maybe we should Prevent people with low-incomes and lower IQ's from being married — because it would be just as arbitrary a rationale, only there would be fewer little plebs running around making such disgusting comments as I've read here today.



  29. 29

    Not only is it a matter of gay rights; it is a matter of human rights.

  30. Devynn says – reply to this


    30

    i've worked for an insurance company that did HSA's and helped ppl get their medical legal paperwork in order. if THIS is happening, SINGLE ppl are screwed, too, if they don't have some family member carrying their paperwork. i knew someone who had a horrible accident and a crazy incident at the hospital involving his mom, sister and wife. the mom and sister had to leave. i bet if she was just his LTGF, she'd had to leave. i find it DISGUSTING that ppl's wishes are being ignored by the very ppl who have SWORN to take care of them over the mere word of those who haven't had a say in their life FOR A REASON. Research Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri SUCKS. you're better off at Truman. srsly.



  31. 31

    the problem with perez reporting is his desire to incite for the benefit of Queers. The Queer created a disturbance in the hospital when his partners family was visiting and demanded they be removed. the man was not dying, he wanted to see his family and the queer was charged with disorderly conduct and taken out in handcuffs. the queer could visit he didn't want the rest of his partners family to visit and caused a disturbance. perez you are lousy at reporting.



  32. 32

    Good! This is how perverts should be treated. Hopefully this type of thing will happen more and more.



  33. 33

    Re: shaygirl1309 – I hope you step in front of a bus. A big Pricilla Queen of the Desert Bus.



  34. 34

    Re: Mad Dog – And you 'Mad Dog' - wow, that's quite a alias - you must have a Gigantic dick. Just Ginormous! Huge, just like your vocabulary. You know, lexicon.

    But seriously, how's that GED and minimum wage treating, ya?

    Are the creditors calling everyday?

    Mad Dog, you're "Winning" in life aren't ya?

  35. Jasonb84 says – reply to this


    35

    Re: shaygirl1309 – It must be sad for you to live with such hate and intolerance towards your fellow gay and lesbian citizens. Have a happy hate filled life.

  36. Milodevenus says – reply to this


    36

    I actually read that the sick man's partner was asked to leave because he was behaving in a disruptive and aggressive manner and it had nothing to do with the fact that he had right of attorney or was in a civil union with the patient. A spokesman for the hospital said that he'd have been removed irrespective of his relationship or legal status to the patient because his disgraceful behaviour was completely unacceptable, uncondusive and disturbing to the physical and mental wellbeing of the patient. Had he been married to a woman who was a patient, he would still have been removed. This story has been manipulated and distorted to suit a homophobic scenario, it is simply a case of an aggressive and out of control visitor being appropriately removed because of unacceptable and disruptive behaviour…and before you jump to conclusions, I am gay and in a civil partnership myself and would be the first to object if the situation being reported here were true, but it is not.

  37. Kaeli says – reply to this


    37

    Re: AttFinch

    Thank you for the corrective information. I truly fear going to hospitals because I don't enjoy the discrimination and hate I sometimes get from medical professionals. It is very scary for those in the LGBT community, especially the T section. :) Thank you for not being part of the hate.