That, Perezcious readers, is how we ended up in possession of this penis pic (above)!
[Image via Usher/Snapchat.]
Forget stocking up on canned goods and water before a snowstorm! Why not head to Taco Bell and buy as many gorditas, chalupas, and double decker tacos that your arms can carry!
Unfortunately for one Baltimore man, his TB craving came AFTER the snow of winter storm Janus had started! But he was determined to live más!
He actually posted a plea on Craigslist, asking anyone with a 4-wheel drive vehicle to take him to Taco Bell!
He admitted to having a little too much to drink so he couldn’t drive himself, not to mention his hybrid car would have never made it in the weather.
"Guys it's snowing like a bitch outside, I've had a few drinks too many, and my sh*tty little hybrid douchemobile can't possibly make it to the neighborhood Taco Bell in this weather. I need someone with a 4 wheel drive vehicle to come pick my drunk ass up, take me to the Taco Bell drive-thru, and drive me back home. Then we can hang out and play video games if you're not a rapist. This is maybe 2 miles round trip. I'll pay in tacos. or chalupas. whatever. Seriously my desire for tacos right now is totally unmanageable, so I'd probably even buy you a 7 layer burrito if you asked nicely."
Aww! He just wants a new fast food friend to eat tacos with!
Unfortunately, his knight in shining SUV never came. But he admitted later to sobering up and braving the elements on his own. He confessed:
"I ended up taking myself after a bit of sobering up. I am currently nursing my taco baby.”
Glad you got your Mexican treats though!
[Image via Taco Bell.]