That, Perezcious readers, is how we ended up in possession of this penis pic (above)!
[Image via Usher/Snapchat.]
If you thought Bruce Jenner was in the middle of turning himself a lovely little lady, well, you thought wrong!
According to sources so close to the Kardashian family that they could presumably describe the scent of Khloe's delicious deli meat-scented breath, that's not the case AT ALL!
The Spruce Bruce isn't trying to become a woman; he's undergoing a litany of physical transformations because he's ADDICTED to plastic surgery!
They say Bruce loves going under the knife almost as much as Michael Jackson did!
"[Bruce has a] Michael Jackson-like obsession with plastic surgery."
Well, at least that explains why he shaved down his throat's
boner Adam's apple!
We aren't sure if this is why Kris Jenner sought a separation, but it doesn't matter - we're just happy he found himself a hobby as long as he's safe!
Keep doing what makes you happy, Brucey!