Calum McSwiggan is adamant that he's not faking his alleged attack.
"I went to the police and now apparently I'm a criminal."
However, the police have revealed that they have video
[Image via Calum McSwiggan/Instagram.]
It was either Will Shakespeare or Jeopardy's Alex Trebek who asked, "What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet!"
Boy, was that 16th Century playwright or Canadian TV host way off!
Names reveal a lot about a person!
Call your daughter Chastity, for example, and there's a 78% she'll grow up to be a stripper! Name your son Christopher Reeves and one way or another that dude is bound to get SUPER high!
It's true! An alleged meth abuser with that name was just arrested in Utah. Not only was his name Christopher Reeves, a combination of Superman actors Christopher Reeve and George Reeves, but homeboy was wearing a Superman shirt during the arrest!
Uggh! Getting behind the wheel while you're flying higher than Superman is a super dangerous move!!!
We can't understand why he'd allegedly do something like that! Was he under the influence of red kryptonite?!?
Christopher Reeves has been charged with DUI and narcotics possession. The local PD offered this telling quote:
"I hope he will live not to regret his choice of T-shirts on this day, but rather his actions."
Regretful actions indeed! We bet his dearly departed namesakes are rolling over in their graves!
Your move, Utah's Henry Cavill! Your move!
[Image via Davis County Sheriff/Columbia Pictures.]