That, Perezcious readers, is how we ended up in possession of this penis pic (above)!
[Image via Usher/Snapchat.]
In the immortal words of Terrence Howard, it's hard out there for a pimp!
And for other people, too, we suspect!
Consider these two Bay Area ninjas who are apparently having so much trouble weathering the turbulent economic storm that they're forced to moonlight at 7-Eleven!!
Needless to say, one woefully underprepared armed robber picked the wrong San Leandro convenience store to try and hold up on Friday!
He went in there with a gun and a mind for mischief, and he left with nothing but an empty hole in his heart where his pride used to be!!!
Wowzers!!! We can't be certain these cashiers are trained and certified ninja masters, but considering how courageously they vanquished their foe we're thinking it's more than likely!
Plus, we can't think of any other reason why they would dare risk their life for a till of money destined for the pockets of their corporate overlords anyway!!!
One of the 7-Eleven employees, who apparently answers only to
Sensei Mark, described the situation:
"I turned and saw the gun. He demanded cash and I held up my hands. He started swinging the gun back and forth. When the gun got close to him, I saw my opportunity. I grabbed it by both hands and yanked it out of his hand."
Yikes!!! We hope you guys at least get a lifetime supply of Slurpees and taquitos for your troubles!