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Every Glee-Tail: Into The Woods

| Filed under: Broadway BabiesWhoopi GoldbergGleeChris ColferDarren CrissChord OverstreetAmber Riley

glee bash episode 1

And here comes the heavy…

Last night’s Glee tackled more than one real-world, hard-hitting issue. Major life choices were made, hearts were tested and a beloved Gleek found himself battered and broken in a hospital bed.

We sure aren’t in Lima anymore… and really, did you expect a light episode when the majority of the songs were Sondheim?

(P.S – Wait till you hear the music from this episode though. From Into The Woods to Amber Riley’s original ballad, it was a slam dunk after slam dunk all night.)

So, let's just rip the band-aid off and get to it, shall we?

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD! DON’T READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT.

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Hate Crimes Happen In Manhattan

While no one can deny that Kurt suffered immense trauma during his high school years as an out student in a small Ohio town, it took him going to New York to see the devastating violent side of homophobia. Being the brave guy his father raised to be (more on that in a minute), Kurt jumped in to save someone who was being gay bashed in an alley, only to get smacked in the head with a brick and beaten ruthlessly himself. He resiliently recovers with his friends, fiancé and yes, father at his side. Burt tears into him out of love and fear, but Kurt stays composed and reminds him that he's only being the man his father raised him to be. It’s been awhile since we had a Burt/Kurt scene and it was well worth the wait.

And with that, Kurt gets a second wind and gives a performance worthy of a standing ovation for his NYADA mid-season-trimester-eval-critique-something-or-other. We don’t know — it was an excuse to bring Whoopi back, that’s all we care about!

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Rachel Quits…NYADA

Oh yeah, she still goes there?

We don’t know if you’ve been having any difficulty keeping up with the timeline of Glee the last two episodes, but let’s try to all get on the same page – it’s mid-year for the crew, making Rachel and Kurt sophomores at NYADA and Darren a freshman. Rachel has already gone on a whirlwind national tour with Funny Girl and now the show is finally opening on Broadway.

And somehow, she’s managing to do all that, plus work at a diner, plus stay in school? Yeah, no – something was gonna have to give, and it seems that something was her education. After getting the sass from Julliard Whoopi about her priorities, Rachel heads for the door, much to the protestations of Kurt.

But, just a second –why weren’t more people on her side for this? Sure, yes, NYADA is a great fake school, but you’re gonna tell us that Rachel wouldn’t be accepted back if she took 2 years off to play the role of a lifetime? That kind of resume headline doesn’t warrant you a ticket back into higher learning? And exactly how many Oscar winners actually went to college…and finished?

We think it’s time to whip out a classic Whoopi Goldberg face in response:

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Any excuse to use that :)

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Doesn’t Matter If You’re Black or White

Now, if you’re a long time Gleek, you remember a time not so long ago or far away when Samercedes was a thing. Trouty Mouth and Miss Ain’t Kelly Rowland were a pretty cute couple back in the day, and Sam is looking to re-ignite what they once had. But after Mercedes introduces him to her backup singers and gets some flack, Jones isn’t so sure that dating a white guy will be good for her career.

But see, homegurl is smarter than that. AND you can’t find them loving feelings. So one minute, she’s giving Sam the cold order to move out, and the next they proclaiming their coupledom ant the Monday night potluck.

Oh, Forgot To Mention…

Blaine apparently loves Star Wars fanfiction, Sam discovers this old 80s sitcom about lesbians and weed called The Facts Of Life and Artie was there.

Next week… Fencing?

[Image via FOX.]

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