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Deep… Oh gawd, gonna lose it again….
Last night, the world bid adieu to Cristina Yang, aka the best "person" on Grey's Anatomy.
Her final episode was a ridiculous roller coaster of emotions and we'd venture a guess that even though you had a year to prepare, nothing really could've prepared you for all the feels you felt during Sandra Oh's final episode.
Oh the feels!
Well, we get it. In fact, we watched the episode and tracked exactly how all of you were feeling through each stage of episode. We'd like to share your journey with others like you in this segment we're calling "The 5 Stages of Grief: Grey's Finale of Feels"
You started the episode thinking, "This is all a cruel joke. Cristina is the most popular character on the show. There is no way they'll let her leave." And from the get go, things seem to be on track that she is, in fact, staying. She can't say goodbye to Owen, she keeps jumping in on more and more surgeries. No, she isn't leaving. Not today, not ever. That's final.
"WTF?! SHONDA RIMES, WHAT ARE YOU DOING???"
That's the thought that ran through everyone's mind after spending a full act of thinking Cristina was killed off in an gas leak explosion at a local mall. Yes, we know she's a main character and all — but that hasn't stopped Shonda from killing before! George O'Malley anyone?!? So for 15 mins, fans were thrashing and aching with the pain that they could in fact be killing her off. It was not a pleasant feeling…
But then she shows up, sweeping in to help in a dire hour. And you're saying, " She can't leave now. Her work isn't done here. She still needs to fix that kid with the heart transplant, she hasn't said goodbye to Hunt yet. We've got more time, this isn't the end."
And then you see… there's only 15 mins left of the episode. You start yelling, "Take Alex! Take Shane! Take Jo!" But in your heart, you know it won't matter.
And then the crippling feels set in. You watch her say goodbye to Owen, in a seemingly perfect, but sad way. She see her hug her mentors - Derek, Bailey and the Chief — to thank them for all she's learned. And the sinking pain in your chest slides deeper and deeper…
And then you watch Cristina get into the cab, leaving forever, and the whole moment, her leaving Meredith behind, just seems… empty. It seems wrong. You turn your heard and beg for a commercial because the sadness is all too much.
But then she comes back! And she and Meredith dance! Yes, that's how it all ends — they dance it out. And now, somehow, it feels okay for her to leave. The pair have closure. Cristina does the one thing for Meredith that she really needs: she tells her the truth. And while that truth might kill her relationship with Derek, it's what makes Yang Meredith's Ying. The dancing, the speech, the love; all of it was the best way to let go.
And then to see Cristina the head of her own department in Zurich, to see Shane dutifully by her side. It all made sense. We all let go.