Good for you, Chels!
Ch-ch-check out Chelsea's topless pics (below)!!!
[Image via Chelsea Handler/Twitter]
So far, we've heard the alleged attacker Vitalii Sediuk's creepy explanation of why he charged Brad, but what about Achilles himself?
"I was at the end of the line signing autographs, when out the corner of my eye I saw someone stage-diving over the barrier at me. I took a step back; this guy had latched onto my lapels. I looked down and the nutter was trying to bury his face in my crotch, so I cracked him twice in the back of the head — not too hard — but enough to get his attention, because he did let go. I think he was then just grabbing for a hand hold because the guys were on him, and he reached up and caught my glasses."
Hey, everyone has a right to defend their family jewels, and since it's Brad we're talking about, they're practically Crown Jewels.
While Vitalii's history as a "prankster" is well known now after he tried kissing Will Smith on the red carpet, put his face in the crotch of Bradley Cooper, and recently took a dive underneath America Ferrera's dress, Brad, like us, was pretty unimpressed with his actions:
"I don't mind an exhibitionist, but if this guy keeps it up he's going to spoil it for the fans who have waited up all night for an autograph or a selfie, because it will make people more wary to approach a crowd. And he should know, if he tries to look up a woman's dress again, he's going to get stomped."
Yeah, with Vitalii charged with Assault, Battery, Unlawful Activity at a Sporting Event, Theatrical or Exhibition, and Unlawful Delay or Interference of a Sporting Event, Theatrical or Exhibition, we're not sure if he'll be hopping underneath anyone's skirt or dress anytime soon.