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Alabama Strikes Down Anti-Sodomy Laws!!! You Can Finally Gobble The Goop & Get Mud On Your Duck In Peace!

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Hoooooray! We have AMAZEBALLZ(INURMOUTH) news for Alabamians who enjoy blow jobs and butt-sex!!!

According to people who dress nicely and carry briefcases, Alabama took a huge step toward not being the most awful and intolerantly humid hole in the world last week when they finally (FINALLY!) decriminalized oral & anal sex!

That's right, sports fans — feel free to ride the baloney pony to poop town and stop in Tuscaloosa on the way!!!

Previously, "[a]ny act of sexual gratification between persons not married to each other involving the sex organs of one person and the mouth or anus of another" was illegal (and, wow, whoever wrote that titillating passage should moonlight for Hustler.) In fact, lawmakers pretty much admitted that was the state's way of trying to curb same-sex relationships.

As of Friday, though, those horribly stupid laws have been struck down!!

Speaking of things going down, this makes us want to go down… South we mean!!! This is the PERFECT excuse for a road trip! We can't wait to drive the chocolate speedway!

While same-sex marriages are still outlawed in the great state of Alabama, and 11 other states still have totally uncool anti-sodomy laws, this is at least a step in the right direction!!!

For the record, the Alabama state tree is the Logleaf Pine and we're 75% sure it's legal to stick your dong in it.

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12 comments to “Alabama Strikes Down Anti-Sodomy Laws!!! You Can Finally Gobble The Goop & Get Mud On Your Duck In Peace!”

  1. Repulsed Reader says – reply to this


    1

    This is the most disgusting article - truly revolting. I only checked in for light entertainment news and in no way was prepared to be sickened. New low for Perez and will never hit this site again.

  2. Torrie says – reply to this


    2

    YOU ARE SUCH A PERVERTED DEVIANT.

  3. MichJB says – reply to this


    3

    You knew Perez would be celebrating the chance to suck the shit off the dick that just screwed his ass.

  4. Amy Lee Christian says – reply to this


    4

    Perez will face his maker and learn what a mistake his filthy sodomist lifestyle is. May God rest his filthy soul.



  5. 5

    Classy. NOT. You are the ultimate douche and you confirm it with posts like this. You ruin the celebration with disgusting pig-like talk about a serious issue. At least it goes with your disgusting pig face. Your poor, poor kid.



  6. 6

    You are the opposite of everything HRC, marriage equality and other groups represent. We are truly disgusted and embarrassed by you. You are a hideous person; more ugly on the outside than your despicable inside.

  7. adblockplus says – reply to this


    7

    There was zero need to be descriptive in this posting. Just why , why, why , why ?????



  8. 8

    Re: Amy Lee Christian – You really should not have stopped taking your meds.

  9. CanadianM says – reply to this


    9

    This is the most filthy and vulgar article I have ever read…is that really how you needed to write about this? How disgusting.

  10. ohmy says – reply to this


    10

    Some people have zero brain cells and will just never learn…Perez is pathetic.

  11. RollTide says – reply to this


    11

    You are sick and we really don't want you anywhere near Alabama with your negativity and arrogance. Wonder what your adopted son will say one day when he reads your discriminatory and disgusting comments.

  12. Sam says – reply to this


    12

    Uh dude, I would ask if you've lost your mind but you don't seem to have one. I'm gay, hard to offend and hell, I almost found this offensive. Luckily, I think I've stopped pretending I have any respect for anything you write anymore which negates your ability to offend me.

    I know you have to stir things up to sell ads but c'mon, grow up just a little.