Wow, this story is royally messed up. Looks like there are 51 ways to leave your lover, Paul Simon!
A woman, Sadie Bell, who was convicted of shooting her lover, Edward Lee, in the stomach over his poor sexual performance is being released from jail after making bail.
(CUE: Ominous music.)
She's been sentenced to 4 years in prison (really? Only 4 years?) and was released pending an appeal.
Speaking of bodily release, her main complaint of her lover that led to him being shot? Not enough "ejaculate." We repeat, her lover did not produce enough "ejaculate" after sex.
That's right, for this trigger happy lady, if you don't come enough, don't come back.
This is the account of what went down that fateful night of July 28th, 2013 according to Chief Assistant Prosecutor Paul Walton:
"She stated that she knew he was having an affair because he wasn’t producing enough ejaculate. She also said to the police some very graphic things about how she expected him to perform, she was a cheap date, she liked sex, she expected him to be able to do what he’s promised; and she said, in essence, to quote her, she was pissed off, so she shot him."
That's right. She knew Edward was having an affair because of the amount of post-coitus ejaculate.
But get this, Edward was married to someone else, and Sadie and him were having a 15-year affair. So, maybe the ring on his finger might have been a clue to him seeing someone else.
The caveat though is that this isn't the first time Sadie shot a lover. Sadie shot her former husband while they were married but was not convicted.
And yet this is the lady who was just released from jail?! What gives world?!
Tags: ejaculate, gifs, gun, jail, legal matters, lover, pissed off, released, sex, shot, stomach, violence, woman