(Srsly, what was with that sniffling??)
Joan Rivers was one of the greatest comedy minds of all time.
The Fashion Police host never missed a trick– or a tweet!
When Twitter was invented, it was just the perfect venue for her amazing one-liners, and she adapted to it with aplomb.
A man reportedly got his finger bitten off at a Beyoncé concert! The shocking twist: It wasn't Jay Z's finger and it wasn't by Solange.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 27, 2014
Celine Dion’s asking $72 million for her Florida home. For that you get 5 bathrooms and the promise of never hearing the Titanic song again.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 25, 2014
I am definitely going to watch The Emmys this year! My makeup team is nominated for "Best Special Effects.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 23, 2014
I’m not surprised that a man my age has not asked me out in a while. They’ve all been too busy shooting “Expendables 3.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 19, 2014
A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue 2 more, but I don’t want to go through menopause again.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 6, 2014
Justin Bieber is going to be the new face of Calvin Klein underwear. We've gone from Marky Mark to Douchey Douche.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 2, 2014
Rosie O’Donnell is returning to The View and I'm so excited. Why should Ellen DeGeneres and Bruce Jenner be the only lesbians on TV?
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) July 26, 2014
As a wedding gift, Ray J gave Kim Kardashian his profits from their sex tape. It’s “Something Old” as well as “Something Blew.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) May 25, 2014
Lady Gaga accused Katy Perry of stealing her ideas. And Gaga knows she's right because she can remember stealing them from Madonna first.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) May 16, 2014
I’m so worried about Kim and Kanye’s wedding. Their photo album is going to be the first ever that has a money shot.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 27, 2014
Madonna had $3000 worth of underwear stolen from her. Now what is she going to wear to her boyfriend’s prom?
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 17, 2014
Mila Kunis is pregnant with Ashton Kutcher's child, and Demi Moore is thrilled. If it's a boy, Demi will be able to date him in 14 years.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 1, 2014
Selena Gomez reportedly ended her friendship with Taylor Swift. How sad! Taylor can't even keep a woman around these days.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) March 21, 2014
[Image via BauerGriffinOnline.]
Tags: ashton kutcher, Best, bruce jenner, calvin klein, Celebrities, celine dion, demi moore, ellen degeneres, funny, jay z, Joan Rivers, justin bieber, katy perry, kim kardashian, madonna, mila kunis, r.i.p., sad sad, selena gomez, solange, taylor swift, Tweets, Twitter