Bethenny Frankel makes divorce sound SO good.
In an interview with E! News, the reality star gave a very funny take on her upcoming divorce from ex-husband and baby daddy Jason Hoppy. The two have been at each other's throats for YEARS despite initially separating in 2012.
Related: Bethenny Doesn't Have Cancer
While B.F. admits that the proceedings have taken a toll on her soul, she also conveyed that things haven't "sucked as much" now that there's a light at the end of the tunnel. The brunette even revealed her plans to throw an epic, wild, and x-rated party once the the divorce is final!
The momma leaked her hysterical scheme when asked by a reporter if she intended to get "dinner" once the ordeal comes to a close.
In response to the "cute" question, Ms. Frankel quipped:
"Go out for dinner? You're so cute…When I get divorced I'm gonna go out for dinner? Yeah—times 10,572! Will I go out for dinner? Are you kidding? I'm gonna be giving myself Skinnygirl enemas. I'm gonna be funneling Skinnygirl down my best friends' throats and my assistants are gonna be naked. We're gonna be hanging from chandeliers in Times Square: body paint, tassels on my titties, coming out of cakes, fireworks, strippers, young men, making out with strangers, one night stands, five night stands. Yeah, I think maybe I might have a celebration. Oh, yeah, and maybe dinner."
LOLZ! We can't get enough of Bethenny's humor… though we really hope she's not kidding at the same time. We'd wait in the freezing cold for dayyysss just to see the gorgeous gal hanging from a chandelier in Times Square. Dayum.
But wait, there's more!
The Skinny Girl mogul added:
"No, I don't think there will be any food involved. Maybe we'll grab a little bag of corn nuts along the way. Dinner. You cute one, you. Yeah, the longest divorce in history since Ike and Tina Turner and I'm gonna go get dinner."
Shiz… we didn't know realize the New York City resident held that unfortunate record! Hopefully some tassels on her "titties" will help ease the pain.
Here's to your epic foray into freedom, Bethenny!
[Image via Bravo/Skinny Girl.]
Tags: bethenny frankel, breakups, funny, love line, real housewives, reality tv