Zayn Malik is definitely getting personal in his new book, Zayn.
Not only does the solo star open up about being in One Direction, but he also revealed his "serious" eating disorder during his time with the band.
And in a newly unveiled excerpt from his memoir, the 23-year-old went into detail about why he made his struggle with anxiety public over the summer.
Related: Zayn Has Good Things To Say About Being In 1D!
You might remember Gigi Hadid's boyfriend even canceled a couple shows because of it. Well, the star has now explained why he needed to back out of London's Capital Summertime Ball:
"I just couldn't go through with it. Mentally, the anxiety had won. Physically, I knew I couldn't function. I would have to pull out."
While his team was ready to put out a statement he had taken "ill", Zayn wanted to be completely honest with his fans:
"I was done with putting out statements that masked what was really going on. I wanted to tell the truth. Anxiety is nothing to be ashamed of; it affects millions of people every day. I know I have fans out there who have been through this kind of thing, too, and I wanted to be honest for their sake, if nothing else. When I was in One Direction, my anxiety issues were huge but, within the safety net of the band, they were at least manageable. As a solo performer, I felt much more exposed, and the psychological stress of performing had just gotten to be too much for me to handle—at that moment, at least. Rather than hiding away, sugar-coating it, I knew I had to put it all out there."
The former boy-bander continued to confess:
"'I'm gonna tell them the truth. I don't want to say I'm sick. I want to tell people what's going on, and I'm not gonna be ashamed of what's happening.' My team was really supportive of my decision, and they agreed that, at this point, our best option was to be honest. That was refreshing, and it made me feel a bit more confident about putting out the statement."
It's good to hear Zayn has such a supportive team behind him!
Dealing with anxiety is not easy, but as Z also went on, he shared he's "trying to accept it":
"It's an aspect of this job that I have to deal with, and I'm trying to accept it. The thing is, I love performing. I love the buzz. I don't want to do any other job. That's why my anxiety is so upsetting and difficult to explain. It's this thing that swells up and blocks out your rational thought processes. Even when you know you want to do something, know that it will be good for you, that you'll enjoy it when you're doing it, the anxiety is telling you a different story. It's a constant battle within yourself."
We're sure his fans can appreciate honesty!
You can read more about the singer by checking out his memoir on shelves November 1.
[Image via Instagram.]
Tags: anxiety, bookz, gigi hadid, health, mental health, one direction, zayn, zayn malik