Almost As Bad As Britney At The VMAs
Filed under: Johnny DeppJohnny Depp's wife "performed" at the NRJ Music Awards in France this past weekend.
And by performed, we mean sucked big time!
Not only did Vanessa Paradis totally lipsynch her song, but she meandered around the stage so lethargically it practically put us to sleep.
Don't do heroin before the show!
Click here to watch her shiteous performance!
Posted: January 28, 2008 at 5:11 pm
SCARY WALK!
It's funny and scary at the same time.
This discussion shows (again) that most Americans not have the faintest idea what ART and INDIVIDUALITY means.
Some of you guys seem really obsessed with teeth!! No her teeth are not horrible, even less rotten! She has a gap between her front teeth, so what?? I find this much more charming than all these ridiculous Hollywood veneers that screams "fake". I really do not think she is on drugs, her performance was done on purpose, and to annoy her producers I guess. Plus in France, a singer performing does not automatically involve dancers shaking their asses and their boobs and the singer doing "strip tease" moves!!
The way I see it, knowing her style, her age, and being that she's a musician and plays guitar(not just a performer), I would think it weird if she had a Britney-type routine. Plus, just not her style. She's more like an American retro singer before the 80's dawn of the Madonnas. It's cool to me, but I always like the unique and different. To each his own, just try to have an open mind. Dancing is not necessary to be a musician/singer. sometimes music takes a backseat to performances and I feel that's kinda sad. Real musicians have it hard.
mean comment as usual for just nothing, not a vanessa fan but hey boy she is a good artist and your easy mean comments will not change it … get a grip
I am sorry but I totally disagree with you.
1- She's not under influence , this his her style , and she didn't "performed" as well as she could because she gave what the French call "le service mininum".
2- She is no Britney or Beyoncé , she doesn't need to shake a lot . It's all about class and sensuality , she doesn't need to provocative or too suggestive.
3- You may not like her type of music but I don't think it's relevant all tastes are in the world so.
4- She doesn't need to fix her teeth , in many other cultures a gap is a sign of beauty and charm, we like that the way it is. Plus , we're are humans not robots , slow down on the artficial.
5- She is thin okay but its her metabolism she has always been like that , at least she's not starving. And some men like them like that so.
6- Married or not Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis are really in love and with their children , they live happily at the time ,I hope that will last forever.
nice tooth gap!
It is a good thing you cannot understand the lyrics. They are worst than the performance itself. Tres mauvais!
We don't see the likes of Jewel and others like her gyrating all over the stage. This is why I don't like top 40's pop music. Ugh. Such a contrived concept. Most people that really appreciate music feels this way. Nothing wrong with liking what you like even if it is pop sugar, but try to appreciate variety and/or a musician that wouldn't get recognition if he/she doesn't have a gaggle of dancing clones behind him or it the sometimes fake and corporate-made ideals of the music industry…I feel sorry for people that really have beautiful music inside them but they never make it because of the image and performing that America or other places requires. It's hard to have an artistic mind sometimes in the face of this superficial culture.
Big Gap
I have purchased Vanessa's latest album. It is certainly different, but enjoyable. Until today, I considered myself a fan of hers. However, if what her other fans are saying is true and she intentionally screwed up this performance because she wasn't happy with the NRJ terms, then that is incredibly childish and unprofessional. I will choose not to waste any more of my hard-earned money on this nonsense. Thank you to her fans for publicizing this diva-like behavior.
Johnny — you can afford to buy this scarecrow some braces!
how on EARTH did this monstrosity snag johnny depp? can someone please explain this to me?
and they aren't married.. not legally anyway..
C'est une grosse merde cette fille ! Elle se fout vraiment de la gueule du public … si c'était pas la femme de Johnny Depp personne n'en parlerait tellement c'est nul !!!
Man with all their money, can they not fix her teeth.
Re: COOL DUDE –
………..and france is also the more powerful country of Europe too!! hate us as you want it but put the record straight!!
and we are also not cursed with obesity and we are considered are really really pretty, i' don' t know what your country is but speak just for yourself not for all other Europeans and pls if we are rude is that because each summer our country is invaded with all other europeans ( except spanish and italians) who come over to spend vacations and do not behave nicely!!! so shut up !!!
and HA HA IF Eurovision is your reference you really really must be a music genious ….. how much I envy you!!!
She's never been much of a dancer… But there's no excuse for the lipsynching! I mean, she is capable of singing, heard her before… And pretty sure she's not drugged. But pretty lame, yeah
She isn't even holding a microphone!!! WTF?
GET YO' TEEPH PHIXED BITCH!!!
vanessa paradis un genie !! une veritable star au sens pure…talentueuse belle mystèrieuse facinante prodigieuse ! ragardés d'autres vidéos d'elle sur youtube
Vanessa was big in French Canada back in the late 1980's and she moved exactly the same way, supposedly part of her "style" - it made her very popular and it looked sexy because she was barely 14 at the time. The gapped teeth (not rotten) were cute when she was younger and were her trade-mark but now? Eesh woman you're a mom and hooked up with the Depp-ster, time for an update!
do you think she does drugs? seriously… in france? she is skinny as can be. i like the song though.
She's just being French. They really haven't a clue. If you've ever been there and watched what passes for television programming you would see that they have shows that go on for like 4 hours that are almost as entertaining and professional as this.
BITCH IS GROSS!
She doesn't move her lips just for show NRJ awards was a bad tv show! All singers are singing in playback… But only HER shows that!
Re: FRANCE FUCK YOU ALL !!! – I'd love to see if your opinion of her would be different if you saw her Chanel ads before they were sent to the re-toucher. She is a walking hangar.
Yeah, I've always liked her and I like her still. I even like the song. She's French and she's cool and she has something no one else has. Johnny Depp. Go girl!
i swear they're not married yet.
not attractive, whats up Johnny?
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!! TEETH!!!!! AND HAS SO MUCH $$$$$$!!!!
WHY JOHNNY DEPP WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This ceremony is a trick, singing without microphone is a provocation of Vanessa…. the French love her, she's awesome on stage !!!
Re: amanda –
I completely agree with u
So, I guess the moral is that there are stupid people everywhere
(if you've seen my previous comments, I'm French)
This is extremely common in French Variety shows. They all lipsynch. No big deal. I still love her, and know that she can sing since I've since her live in Montreal.
Vanessa Paradis is never 'frantic' on stage like a lot of singers .She's a great actress , singer and mom and if she chooses to move differently -FINE .She doesn't have to do it like everyone else …and you should stop implying things that aren't true about drugs .Vanassa Paradis is NOT France's Britney or the UK's Amy …she's got Johnny and the kids ! Alot of people here like her ..and her voice ..
Probably not her best performance. She still gets to bang Johnny every night, envy of millions of women! In the age of silicon and botox, i'm glad she is natural.
I love your blog !!
I didn't watch this "performance" and this program on tv (so boring, reading the most boring book is easier than watch this … ) It so funny and ridiculous … love it !!
Um. The point is that it's supposed to be ethereal and somewhat surrealist. Sorry that she's not half naked and shaking her cooch in front of everyone WHILE lipsyncing. Obviously, she isn't TRYING to pretend to sing, so therefore, making a different sort of statement. And also, who gives a shit about her teeth. I swear that everyone that comments on perez is totally shallow.
Re: COOL DUDE –
If nobody like France, why is France the most touristic country OF THE WORLD?
Now we know why he hasn't married her. What is wrong with her? Jack Sparrow could have done better than that!!!!! At least THAT would have been intertaining!
At least Britney danced and had nice tits and curves. This si shiteous
americans are so obsessed with teeth. her teeth give her character, theyre not fake and perfect like everyone elses
if it weren't for the teeth, she'd be a lot better-looking.
Everybody playbacks on the NRJ awards..they're obligated.
and the biggest highlight of the night was definitely TOKIO HOTEL !!
They are fierce~
i have to disagree.. she was waay better than britney.. the song didnt call for elaborate dance moves like gimme more and she somehoe ended up doing the same thing as britney.. her performance at least fit the song better.. but i still think jonny should ave married me =]
Re: Beverley – She is not a great singer. She sounds like a pre-pubescent boy! She can not dance…not that there is anything wrong with that…but if that is the case she shouldn't try. Just stand still in front of the mike and sing. That "genie in the bottle" move was embarrassing to watch. It is a signature move for her. Check out her videos on you tube. She also lacks charisma. The reason why people say she must be drugged up is because there is not a flicker of light in her eyes. She looks like a Zombie.
The tooth thing is her choice, but let's face it, it's not a minor flaw…it's just plain ugly. I agree that the French are different. I have spent a lot of time there. The French have become much nicer to Americans now, but they are still a pompous lot. And yes there are many beautiful French women….even the ultra thin ones. Vanessa is just not one of them any more. The years have not been kind to her, and her Chanel ads are retouched beyond belief. There are also a lot of french women who don't shave under their arms, and by the smell in the Metro, apparently don't like deodorant. Perhaps french men prefer au naturelle, although I have never been at a loss for suitors when I am in Paris. As far as Vanessa being such a great Mom….first and foremost put out the damn cigarrettes (that goes for you to Johnny) cigarettes. That is probably the number one reason she has aged so poorly. And teach your kids about professionalism and class. Underperforming as a protest, was an insult to everyone who supports her. She behaved like a spoiled petulant brat. If you don't want to play by the rules, then don't enter the game.
I'm French too and it's my understanding that everyone else sang live that night. She's the only one who lipsynched. WTF!
She could at least try to look awake and dance. That's a pathetic excuse of a singer.
She could have done an effort for her fans even though she was pissed off at the network.
It's easy to be so harsh when you have a monitor to hide behind, isn't it? Interesting.
OMGG i feel sorry for her making britney look better she wouldn't even pretend to sing she didn't even have a mic, johnny was a better singer in sweeney tod. and i bet he's a better dancer too lol
The French are more sophisticated and subtle than fake-boobs-in-your-face Americans. I think she looks great and I can see why Johnny would rather have her than a bimbo. Her performance wasn't half bad.
she's a great singer, i think she was bored because she had to go to this piece of shit of a show! NRJ is very popular in France but it's absolute crap… but then if you like Rihanna who's a star beause of her boobjob it's your choice…
since when can't a performer afford back up dancers…holy shit..how'd he marry that woman? and she coudln't even pretend to lipsinc with a fake mike, it may have given her something to do with her hands, because jazz hands definetely don't fit this song.
WTF!!! these people shouldn't even be on stage if they are high as a kite!
Let's make this clear: the NRJ Music Awards are the cheapest music event on earth. Most artists don't come to get their awards, the performances suck and even the host sucks… So don't be too hard on Vanessa Paradis: she was just trying to fit in!
She doesn't even have a mic!
so as for them being married, yes i agree, and to those who compared it to kurt and goldie, kurt and goldie are married, they just never walked down an aisle,
and back to the song
the song is wicked, she is gorgeous the lip syncing is terrible however
hi im german and i dont even understand why this goodlooking boy called johny depp is with a fuckin french shit have u seen her without make up its like a ghost kisses from germany
This just proves to be another sad example to our increasing vapid sedated culture.
Re: maria – Guten Tag Maria! I agree with you. Johnny must be "veruckt"! Vanessa ist hasslich.
WTH!
She could have worn a mic!
That performance was dreadful!
With all her money, WHY DOESN'T SHE FIX HER TEETH?! And her song makes no sense…I should know, I speak french…Man she's horrible!!
WWOWW ! SHe`S UGLY !
she reminds of something.. i don`t remenber what though lol !
OMYGOSHH
But she is Freaking uglyyy.. that`s sad, pluss she has a shitty body !
She should of had even camee out . ! She didn`t even move her lipss.. it was just a little thing ! :S
wow !
At least britney had a mic on her … this girl doesn't … is her voice just really that loud ?? lol
omg,, she is soooo thin!! :O
What the fuck? Leave Vanessa alone, she's a wonderful singer, and i don't understand why,some dumb people talks about her teeth! And why you talks about Johnny Depp!
What the hell does he see in her…huge gap and not very attractive. She's as thin as a pole!! She has no talent what so ever!! Ugh!
shes just walking around. she can do better than this. very pretty but way too skinny
Almost as bad as Britney Spears, that was a million times worse than Britneys performance.
this is how she performs,i spent the first seven years of my life in paris when she was just starting out and she's never been energetic…i can't believe that she had the nerve to blatantly lip synch like that though!my god!i do better in my room with my brush
the commenters that see her thin as pole might be overweighted!!!
she's super thin a lot of women around here have her shape ..; but thanks to the fat culture you'd rather see others as "skinny" than face the fact taht you are fat!!
and the same thing that goes with keira knightley….european women are slim this is it!!! the american size 2 is almost the average size !!!!!
you are the people that have a problem with weight not the rest of the world!!!
No it`s worse than VMA!!!! And those teeth! Why doesen`t she fix it??? When ur fauomos it`s normal to fix stuff like that!! Especially when it`s so bad!!!
omggaawwdd!!! what the FECK was the point in that??!! she just looked like a junkie dancin in a nightclub!!! not even a mic hahahahahaha!! i usued to be so jealous of this girl- not any more!!
Re: frenchgirl - "the commenters that see her thin as pole might be overweighted!!!" –
Yeah, and the commenters who see her weight as normal must be anorexic themselves!!! Pul-leeze. Yes, we are all bitter jealous fattie Americans in love with Depp with one hand on the keyboard and the other wrapped around a Royale with Cheese, aren't we? NOT. Come up with a new schtick, please. And accept the fact that your Vanessa is an opportunistic talentless hack who fucked for tracks and used the oldest trick in the book to snag herself a man.
if I were lucky enuf to be johnny depp's partner, I'd make it my full time job to just be his sweet fuck baby! what's her prob?
It looks like she's been eat'un corn through a barbed wire fence.
IF YOU DON'T KNOW HER MUSIC THAN YOU MAY THINK THIS IS A LITTLE STRANGE. SHE SINGS WONDERFULLY AND THIS IS JUST HER STYLE. SHE ISIN'T AMERICAN SO IT MAY BE TOO DIFFERENT FOR YOU.
Everyone needs to get over her teeth and realize that Johnny Depp will not marry you.
SORRY TO SAY.
ohmuhlawd.
shes worse than britney.
way worse.
she makes britney actually look normal.
wtf why was she trying to dance? britney even did better than her dancing.
would it have killed her to use a mic at least?
she looks like one of those kids in children of the corn.
she makes france look bad.
Awful! What the hell kind of a performance was that??!! It looks like they heavily sedated her before the show.
Re: frenchgirl – the commenters that see her thin as pole might be overweighted!!!
she's super thin a lot of women around here have her shape ..; but thanks to the fat culture you'd rather see others as "skinny" than face the fact taht you are fat!!
and the same thing that goes with keira knightley….european women are slim this is it!!! the american size 2 is almost the average size !!!!!
you are the people that have a problem with weight not the rest of the world.
Give me a break. French women may be skinny, and some may be beautiful, but believe me I have spent enough time in France to know that there's also a whole lot of fugly. First of all, they smoke so much that it's coming out their assholes. That may help you stay slim, but it ruins your skin. Second there is a good number of them who don't shave under their arms, or their legs, or use deodorant. Perhaps that is why the French men cheat on their wives more than any other nationality. Look at the shining example Sarkozy is!
And HOW does she look skanky in this video? She's not wearing a bikini and fucking a pole, like Britney does. She looks like a normal person.
hahahaha wow thats pathetic..
and the fact that she has no microphone whatsoever just makes it even more obvious.
I actually love it. I think it looks whimsical, and really, the focus is meant to be on the background. Very European.
i didnt realize vanessa was this ugly and whats up with her teeth?
wow, I'm not really sure what to say to that. It was a catchy song I suppose …. but she could have had a mic at least. She needs to fix her teeth man, no wonder she is never smiling in her photos with J. Depp … J. Depp needs a woman with some meat on her, how did their child ever live through 9 months being carried by that woman, it would have been born anorexic.
please god honey, eat something. Pehaps you may have more energy for your next VMVA's proformance … if they will have you back.
so upset. this is what he had children with. even winona was better
Did not jonney make enough money to fix her teeth?
Re: jr – man ur hilarious and soooo right
OMG what the fuck is this crazy untalented bitch doing with johnny depp? WOW.
I like BUFFY THE VAMPIRE as well , but I did not get my teeth changed like Angle
Une chance que t'es con…toute sles émissions de France ont ce procédé….il y a un mois, elle chantait live, guitare à la main avec M…t'es juste un trou du cul, et je viens de le réaliser….
Re: DEANNA – The skank landed the sexiest man on earth by getting pregnant two months after they began dating.
O-M-G JOHNNY DEPP HAS SOOOO MANY BETTER OPTIONS OUT THERE….WHY THE FUCK IS HE GOING OUT WITH THIS PIECE OF CACA….HES SO FUCKING HOT BTW….
ehhh, how you say…. "vagrant" in French? BRUSH YOUR EFFING TEETH and eat a sandwich, ho.
does she even have a mic like on her att allll
lol this is shithouse
WOW Did you all know she is also a Channel model……. WTF? WHY? mr. Depp claims he fell in love the moment he say her. Yulk! I guess he has low standards when it comes to looks.
If you guys don't see the snake sex move…you are blind. THAT'S why Johnny probably loves her. Plus she's 'different', and he's so not mainsteam.
THE TEETH….WHAT IS UP WITH HER TEETH.
you would think someone as well endowed as depp would buy his woman a new set of chompers.
Maybe he perfers her to be ugly just so he can look prettier.
You could drive a mac truck through her teeth! Honestly, Johnny R U SERIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what the HELL does Depp see in that drugged up trainwreck???