What's He Smoking????
Filed under: John Mayer > When Celebrities Blog
He's trying to get deep.
John Mayer loves to post on his blog.
His entries are usually funny, but his most recent one is rambling and self-indulgent.
If you make it through to the end, you get a cookie!
P.S. He's totally talking about us.
Shut your piehole, John, or we'll have to tell the world what happened that night at Stereo!
Says Mayer:
"FROM THE HEART….
I need to write this.
I've been traveling alone in Japan for the better part of three weeks now, and It's been so remarkable an experience for me that I can't book a ticket home yet. I haven't spoken very much out loud these days, but I've been thinking to myself in what feels like surround sound. I can see so many things clearly, and feel so connected to myself and the world around me that I need to share the perspective with you.
I'm already aware that when I sing, say or write anything, 50 percent of the response will be in support of it and the other 50 will want to discount it. This blog, though, is directed to 100 percent of people reading it. If my blog truly does have any cultural effect, then it should be used for more than just pictures of sneakers and funny youtube videos. (If you don't think my blog has any effect, than you can't by definition be reading this right now and therefore don't have to respond to it in any way. Isn't that tidy?)
What I'm about to write isn't about fame or success or celebrity or the media. That's my business.
This is about us all.
This is about a level of self consciousness so high in my generation, that it's actually toxic.
This is about the girl in her bedroom who poses in front of the camera she's awkwardly holding in her outstretched hand. She'll take a hundred photos until coming up with one she's happy with, which inevitably looks nothing like her, and after she's done poring over images of herself, will post one on her myspace page and then write something like " I don't give a f*ck what you think about me. "
This is about the person trying out for American Idol, who while going off about how confident they are that they were born ready to sing in front of the world, are trembling so badly they can hardly breathe.
This is about me, the guy who walks through a throng of photographers into a restaurant like he's Paul Newman, but who leaves a "reject" pile of clothes in his closet so high that his cleaning lady can't figure out how one man can step into so many pairs of pants in a week.
This is about a young guy who maintains a celebrity blog that subsists on tearing other people down but who has wrestled with a lifelong battle for acceptance as a gay man.
This is about us all. Every one of us. Who all seem to know deep down that it's incredibly hard to be alive and interact with the world around us but will try and cover it up at any cost. For as badass and unaffected as we try to come off, we're all just one sentence away from being brought to the edge of tears, if only it was worded right. And I don't want to act immune to that anymore. I took the biggest detour from myself over the past year, since I decided that I wasn't going to care about what people thought about me. I got to the point where I had so much padding on that, sure, I couldn't feel the negativity, but that's because I couldn't feel much of anything. And I think I'm done with that.
I'm not the first person to admit we're all self conscious, Kanye was. But what I want to do is to shed a little light on why we're all in the same boat, no matter the shape of the life we lead: because every one of us were told since birth that we were special. We were spoken to by name through a television. We were promised we could be anything that we wanted to be, if only we believed it and then, faster than we saw coming, we were set loose into the world to shake hands with the millions of other people who were told the exact same thing.
And really? Really? It turns out we're just not all that special, when you break it down. Beautifully unspectacular, actually. And that truth is going to catch up with us whether we want to run from it or not. The paparazzo following me to the gym ain't gonna be Herb Ritts and the guy he's following ain't gonna be Bob Dylan. It's just a matter of how old you are once you embrace that fact. And for me, 30 sounds about right.
What now, then? I can only really say for myself: Enjoy who I am, the talents and the liabilities. Stop acting careless. In fact, care more. Be vulnerable but stay away from where it hurts. Read. See more shows. Of any kind. Rock shows, art shows, boat shows. Create more art. Wear hoodies to dinner. Carry a notebook and hand it to people when they passionately recommend something and ask them to write it down for me.
Root for others.
Give more and expect the same in return, but over time.
Act nervous when I'm nervous, puzzled when I don't know what the hell to do, and smile when it all goes my way. And never in any other order than that.
And when it's all over, whether at the end of this fabulous career or of this life, which I hope takes place at the same time, I should look back and say that I had it good and I made the most of it while I was able. And so should you.
I'm going quiet now.
John"
[Image via Mavrix Online.]
John + Stereo + another dude
Haha perez got owned and now he's crying about it X)
He´s probably going through some budhist phase… it´s either coaching or awereness that´s growing into him.
I hope it lingers.
Awesome blog entry, John!
PS Perez: You see, 600 hundred people actually read that to the very end and found it very inspiring (it is). Reading long sentences shouldn´t be a problem at all.
But Perez, give the man the credit, he is sooooooooooo right about you!
Learn a lessson from Johnny an try and be nicer instead of threatening him with ill-spirited gossip.
Acknowledge your problems.
Learn about them.
Overcome them.
Be less cool. Be a better person.
(And NO, linking to charities doens´t make you "a better person", even if it is a nice step.)
Don't you guys think that Perez would have told us what happened at Stereo that night? I mean he posted pics of that night, which blew the cover on Fugs/Jugs relationship. He posted about Jugs little dance for everyone, their wild make out session, John being massively drunk. What else is there to happen? I mean unless John was doing coke, which I highly doubt because we've seen a lot of pics from that night. Or Fugs and Jugs got involved in a threesome on the dancefloor then I highly doubt this is brand, new revealing information
All these damn haters bitching about Perez and how they hate his site are just sad pathetic losers with no lives. If you don't like this site, then WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN HERE??? And the answer to that is you actually DO like this site. Otherwise you wouldn't be here in the first place. Ever thought about (hmm oh I don't know) maybe boycotting it instead since you "haaate" it so much? Fuckin cunts.
All these people bitching about how mean Perez is to celebs are the same fucking people sending death threats to Britney, Paris and Lohan, calling them fugly and all sorts of nasty things. So spare me with your self-righteous bullshit. Not buying it assholes.
Mayer's right. I agree with everything he said!
I am now a fan of Mayer.
Glad someone in the entertainment buz gets it!
Perez you suck!!!!
Why so defensive Perez? Maybe take a moment and try to learn something about yourself.
Most of the posters are John Gayer douch bag. I'll be so glad when his shit hits the fan-fucking up his face and he can't pay enough people to clean his shit up no more. Please let it happen soon!
I hate this fake pathetic douch bag more and more with every blog.
What would be really beautiful is if John's blog inspired Perez to think about his life and how he is living it.
Everything Jon is saying is so true. Our generation is lost. We all want our moment in the spotlight and will do anything at any cost to get there. We are neglecting the truly beautiful and simple things in life.
In our last days of life I'm sure we won't be reminiscing about how many myspace friends we gathered or how much attention we recieved at 20 for 'looking so beautiful'. Start living people!…really living!
John,
I liked your comments. I agree with many of them.
Amanda
Perez, I'm a fan of yours, but if it's okay for you to 'talk' about other people i.e. celebrities on your blog, then it's okay for them to talk about you too. If you think John is being judgmental and mean.. well, what do you think you've been doing all this time? You think John's self-absorbed? The same can be said about you.
That was actually pretty amazing. Maybe you should pay more attention that.
wow perez, you're an asshole.
you know everything he said about you is true.
get an actual life instead of tearing down other people.
you gay fat piece of shit.
ps- it's sad how you own a website viewed by thousands of people, but you can't spell for your life.
Hey it seems like it is about perez but if he can dish it than he should be able to take it so why get upset?? sometimes when you talk shyt about ppl thats what happens! and the response about threatening to say what you saw in stereo……kinda childish there buddy
i think he's trying to give you a bit of advice. after all, we've all noticed how shit this website has become after you've become a bit self indulgent recently….
he's absolutely right! you do a lot of positive perez, but also negative you should give some credit. our generation is fucked sort of.
For someone who claims to be in Japan I wouldn't be hunched over a blog, I would be all over Japan-hell he can write his thoughts down in a book. Looks like someone is looking for sympathy.
Is his image in any of his so call photos?
Piece of butt wipe probably is recovering from plastic surgery.
He is such a loser. Go ahead Mayer find a bridge and jump better yet pull a trigger, you got a big head you can't miss. I promise I will not drop one tear.
HE'S ON TO SOMETHING VERY SIMPLE AND TRUE THAT IF YOU DON'T GET IT — IT SUCKS TO BE YOU!!!!
Not that I ever thought Perez was a big thinker or anything, but even I'm surprised he would be such an idiot. That blog was very insightful and spot on. Sad he can't see that or even glean something from it for himself…of course, we are talking about someone who refers to themselves in the third person…I guess I was expecting too much. lol
that was really well said!
Lets hope JM don't make it back to the states. That would be our gain hope Karma kicks him in the ass.
What a revelation John Mayer… I guess he hasn't spent much time thinking before
What a DOUCHE!!! Thank you John Mayer, Captain Obvious - you people actually thought that was deep? He had himself a mental wank of prosaic and pedestrian musings - jeez I remember when thoughts like that were deep, maybe in 6th grade? John, get OVER yourself cheez-whiz.
John is so full of bullshit.
I loved it. It is exactly how I have been feeling, what I have been thinking, and I have embraced the reality of it all too. At the same age! So take it in, gain some insight and wisdom. Let John be who he is, express what he feels, without insulting him or tearing him down. Why shouldn't we? And let's all try to do better.
WTF this douch bag again, I wish someone could kick JohnGayer's ass.
I guess the fucking borat suit didn't give his gay ass enough attention. Thats why you call them whores….huh
I think he's fabulous and very self aware. it's really sad that people cant see his honesty as his reality and accept that.
I see John likes his woman and fans the same way "stupid as hell"
I agree with it all! He makes me feel less alone
Re: Is this familiar to anyone else?!?! – YES, holy crap…I was waiting for someone to say that!!
Hey John thinking that is new for you. Pull your head out of your ass more often so you can think, that way you will not end up with any more Jessuck yourdick Simpsons.
He tends to over analyze things. He should just enjoy life.
Man say no to the drugs and check into rehab or is that what your are already doing.
Dear John Mayer, As I sit here and write this, ther is a banner that is asking me to click on it to find out when I die…just for fun. I get it and I think you are amazing, but you will never know how amazing I am because I would never want your crazy life. I still love your music, I just wish this all wasn't so toxic. Miss Sak
Whats this all about??? I guess it's time to buy tour tickets.
He's pissed coz Perez posted that Jessica Simpson entry which made him seem like a real jerk. He lives in his own idealistic world. He should follow what he preaches. Maybe the gay man is really himself. The rumor is he takes home guys he meets at clubs. I wonder if he visited any saunas in Japan.
I understand Simpson now when she said "she needed a man not a boy" good thing Jess got away from him he would have took her down with him.
Ya know the thing is Perez is when you started this blog I think its because you really loved celebrities. I mean even though you say terrible things about them and talk about their children at the same time you praise them for their efforts in movies and especially music (and generally the ones who do deserve praise). I read an article about you in Newsweek once and it didnt talk so much about how you are hateful towards celebrities but about your influence on getting music that isnt heard listened to. Im shocked to hear you dismiss what John Mayer is saying. For someone who gives Britney, Ashlee, Lohan, and Jessica such a hard time for being "stupid" he actually said something and I think he also knew you were going to read it. I also think you like him. I think you like him as a musician and I think you like him as a person.I also think that if this blog was up when he was first starting out you would of told everyone about some guy named John. If something happened at Stereo it was probably that he didnt treat you like shit. For someone who I think truly loves the music don't dismiss what is at the core of that …writing and free expression.
I wonder what gay guy is hiding out with him in Japan.
sorry p, this was actually brilliant.
so NOT self-indulgent and rambling. YOU, perez, are self-indulgent and rambling.
This site is the real winner, I bet Mayer's lame ass shitty sites didn't get as many hits. You Mayer peeps are some dumb bitches. Dumb turds you should have spent time clicking into your own lame ass sites in stead of running here.
YESSSSSS GO PEREZ LOVE IT HERE!
get some sleep,john…….
John mayer is amazing and I love him!
But I love you too perez, although is has some very good points! I know its no sweat off your back anyway!
I love John Mayer!
Notice how you really can't get much music related stuff out of Johnboy lately.
Sad thing is we fans got less and less music from this jerk every year. I just can't take it anymore with this jerk. He should have put more thought to a song. Sorry this didn't do it for me.
Will the tours be posted this week. I mean we got a heart tugging blog so that can mean on thing, we get tour dates. Come on I even heard the harps playing.
John's blog was so true, so honest and raw. I have not seen one other celebrity deal with life in such an open and analytical manner. Every other celebrity is out there trying to be the next big IT person, (and I'm not saying that John doesn't want to be sucessful) but when you read this, you know that his music is more about a true musician and not some publicity whore. This makes me love him even more.
And as far as Perez, I love you too, but sometimes…the reflection we see in the mirror isn't what we want it to be, and in your case, he described you to a T. So don't hate, but realize that people see you for who you really are and not all this avertising bullshit.
so funny how some idiot says perez sucks dick for coke… what a dumbass. why are you reading this shit?
honestly
o perez u know hes so right baby, u gotta stop tearing ppl down its toxic and lame…be nice and spread love or else ur just adding to the haterade along with creating the insecurities mr mayer speaks so eloquently of
love u hun but be nice!
jesus christ, that was depressing. thanks, john.
I'm surprised that a guy who was with Jessica Simpson can say something so intelligent.
Very true, we have to recognise that this is a problem and live life as it comes.
Mayer please find that bridge and jump. I didn't buy your garbage.
Well I Johnny cant' just get out there and play music and sing his shit is lame. He has to try stunts like this to get fans back. This Phony's shithead music suck. This is sinking to a new low. Look is scared the fans will not be there for him. So he makes like he is going on some soul search trip to Japan and come back changed, hit a few clubs then announce tour. May your deception end and your next album suck like the last one did.
what is that white spot on his tongue??? vd?
i actually thought that blog was really interesting and right!!! i feel the exact same way!! and it's hard to put your thoughts into words, so perez get over yourself and realize that maybe he's talking about you in ONE section (because he knows you'll repost this…) he's talking about everyone too.
i like his fuqq faces.
www.ydzonline.com
perez, to balance out all the negativity on your site, this was a great opportunity to say something nice about someone or, at least, something they've done. i dont care much about john mayer - some people apparently think he's a whiny bitch - but this is good writing. and the message here is something interesting that you should take another look at.
i bet if your name weren't there, you wouldn't have published it. very sad. they say no press is bad press, but i'd be embarrassed to be called out like that. think about it…
by the way, do you even read these comments?
Re: aneurysm – John was making a reference to Kanye's song "All Falls Down". Kanye says, "We all self conscious I'm just the first to admit it".
I loved it. Perez, you're just mad because John's got you pegged. Deep down, you know he's right. Are you actually going to deny what he said about you is untrue??? Yeah, I didn't think so.
He's got all of us there.
mario laundramat
Perez can you please filter your comments so I don't have to read 50 "FIRST" comments everytime I scroll? Its annoying.
respect, this guy is way smarter than i thought
I want my cookie NOW!!
John should stop havin a pity party and maybe Mr. "I have deep political veiws" should worry about people in Tibet right now instead of how many pairs of pants he is wearing per week; pants that now need to be washed without even being worn, wasting water resources that developing countries aren't lucky enough to have. I see John's still waiting on the world to change… waiting, but not actually doing anything…
fuck I luvv u perez!!! John mayer is such a tool!!
come on p, WHAT HAPPENED AT STEREO??
I think a lot of people missed the point…especially you Perez.
I love reading John's stuff and I wish he wouldn't go quiet.
Perez has said that he can dish it out so he can take it. Wasn't it Perez himself who named himself P-nasty. He can be crude as hell and just down right nasty. So John Mayer (who Mongo calls Fugs) makes a little comment about him, and he threatens to reveal something about John Mayer lol. John just needs to threaten Perez that he will reveal the 'Teddy and the rubber fist' incident.
its not all crackpot, what he said actually makes a lot of sense, i think its too true for you and thats why it hurts, you can't understand it, you are below it.
i read it all…where's my cookie? I totally agree with john, sorry perez. There comes a point in your life when you start to realize all this, and it's called MATURITY!!! Self-awareness, self-love, it all ties in with maturity. John said it very eloquently, just like his songs. I don't understand why you have to hate, perez. Is it b/c the truth hurts you? Or maybe it's just b/c you haven't reached that level of maturity yet. And if he did smoke something before writing this, then maybe next time you should ask him to share that shit with you…but, hey, that's just my opinion =)
done! now I want my cookie *_* .. xD
John mayer is cool. I like him. He makes sense. we are all told the same things, the same lie really, that we are special. Not really, only the lonely
What a JERK! I stopped reading less than half-way that crap…and realize that's time I will never get back. I should sue this idiot!
He seems like one of the most intelligent and normal people in showbusiness, although I know virtually nothing about him and have probably never even heard a song of his. Can't see how he could have dated Jessica Simpson for even a day.
That's a beautiful statement….coming from a celebrity.
No wonder John is such a good songwriter - cutz right through the bull. Very bright guy.
Yep, sorry Perez, he got you, and us, and me, to a tee. He sounds like a smart, thoughtful, head-screwed-on guy. And yet I've never been to his blog — I just read him through you!! But for all your dismissing, he gets us — he gets this generation and the chronic self-referential, self-promoting self-consciousness that makes us ill:
'The paparazzo following me to the gym ain't gonna be Herb Ritts and the guy he's following ain't gonna be Bob Dylan.'
I like what he says. I hope he ends up with a happy life — I hope the celebrity thing (including me, all of us, and our ridiculous obsession with this blog) doesn't tear him down despite his intelligence.
Good on him. Shame on us. Perez, aren't you feeling shaky yet? Maybe time for an anonymous self-discovery trip to Japan/India/some place where they don't have time to think about this shit?
I get what he says but life just doesnt work like that if it did I would be bum but I'm not because I fake like the rest of the +6 billion. And on a side note John mayer should stop taking www.perezhilton.com so seriously its just a fun nasty little site alota people love to visit for shits and giggles its cool dont takle it so seriously.
John Mayer shows quite a bit of depth in this blog. I love how he depicts the struggle of vulnerability and self acceptance. Instead of saying, "What's He Smoking????", read a little deeper.
DEAR PEREZ,
USED TO LIKE JOHN MAYER UNTILL HE TURNED INTO A WANKER. HE HAS NOW HURT TWO OF MY FAV'S BEING YOU AND JESS SIMPSON - IN THAT ORDER. JOHN MAYER = TOTALLY SELF OBSORBENT. UP JOHN MAYERS ASS. PEREZ PLEASE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED AT STEREO!!!!!!!!!!
YOU OWE IT TOO US!
YOU OWE IT TOO US!
YOU OWE IT TOO US!
YOU OWE IT TOO US!
YOU OWE IT TOO US!
Re: me too –
I'm sure there's a lot that Perez doesn't tell us because if you really knew the truth about these celebrities, a lot of them would go into exile from all the bad press they'd get. Perez, get's scoops from these celebs and their publicists. Mayer and Simpson's people, mainly Simpson, sent in all those scoops and pics because they wanted press for their showmance. They're working right along with Perez, so they need to stop complaining.
Further proof that John M and I could totally hang together - and by that - I mean, he could be the father of my children and we could grow old together on my front porch talking about books we've read, bad tv we have watched and telling each other really funny pirate jokes. WHY does he a) not track me down and b) insist on dating superhot hollywood types with ginormous ta-tas? I'm cute and my breasts may be small, but they are lovely!
Hopefully he puts that into a song. Loved it.
Perezito, it sucks he penned "una puyita" at you but I think he's being honest and not bullshitting for once… his post is full of pain and I think he was actually - perhaps - identifying with you. I think he was trying to come out and say (in a roundabout way) that he is human too even though he's always portrayed as a heartless asshole who loves to prank people (Ashton's 2nd cousin, maybe?). We all have feelings and sometimes we create these huge walls to protect ourselves and what ends up happening is that we create an enclosure that forces us to be alone with ourselves.
I thought that was beautiful. It really resonated to me, and I'm happy other posters felt it to. Lol, I wonder if Momma O got him to read New Earth?
sounds like a teenage girl's rambling. fucking retard…
Hey Mayer will you like some cheese with your whine. I use to like Mayer but I just got so tired of his f#@king tricks. He don't rely on talent to get fans. I think he spent too much time with Jessica Simpson.
Re: Keepin Real –
While I agree with you, I definitely think that Perez has posted some not so nice things about celebs, via blind items. Remember the Lindsay drug use stories and the Nicole Richie/Mischa Barton pot pics. I do believe that Perez would have told us EVERYTHING that happened that night. Everyone was dying to figure out whether those two were a couple or not, and Perez had the exclusive scoop. and why wait almost 18 months later to post this scoop? it's not like those two are even together anymore. if he wanted to be exclusive with any gossip, he would have posted it while their relationship was on the demise or during the months they were spotted together to make something juicy.
For God's sake SHUT UP JOHN MAYER. No one has the time to read all your incoherent ramblings.
WOW! I love this. It reigns so true. Quite enlightening. It helps to make a little sense of things in this world. The things you say are so true but I've never stopped to think about it in this way. To me it sounds like great lyrics to a ballad. Thank you, John.
Well some stuff is deep other stuff is not but it sucks he mentions u though its great cus it just shows you how important you are and how much he cares about you
But its your job to celebrity blog its not meant to be nice and you applaud when deserved and tear people down when needed! so jejej free publicity I say lol
Perez Panama Loves!! get ur ass down here and lets party!
amazing.
I have never seen someone use so many people to build up a fan base. He reminds me of the Simpsons.
1. African Americans-he poses for pictures standing next
to them acting like they are best friends.
2. Female fans-for sex and money to boast his career.
3. Gays he acts like hes one.
4. Female Celebrities-used them for sex and media attention.
There is a host of others but I will stop there. I don't know how this dude lives with himself. One day it will all really catch up to him and he won't play act like he is doing now. Maybe then he will off himself.
Well.. WOW, just wow! He's full of wise words and it's weird coming from a guy who used to date Jessica Simpson.