Britney Fires Her New Assistant!
Filed under: Britney Spears
Well, this didn't last very long.
Britney Spears is looking for a new bitch!
The former pop star fired her current assistant, Shannon Funk, on Wednesday amidst rumors that Shannon was more trouble than she was worth.
Shannon lasted only about three weeks.
"Britney felt a lot of her recent troubles started and stopped with Shannon," an insider close to Spears tells Life & Style weekly. “Britney thought [Shannon] was talking badly about her. She was very rude and Britney felt she was letting business emails fall by the wayside.”
The mother of two parted ways with her former assistant, cousin Alli Sims, within the last month.
Now Britney is alone and out of control!
[Image via Celebrity Babylon.]
Posted: July 26, 2007 at 5:28 pm
id like to be her assistant, how do you apply?
Brit Brit Brit what is up girl. You need some black D**k to keep yo ass in line 4real
#98 KOHA FIRST LESBIANS ARE NOT HOT. BUT HOW SWEET OF YOU TO OFFER TO BE HER BULL-DIKE AND SLAVE ALL ROLLED INTO ONE!!!!!!!!
#105 AVa STOP USING THIS SITE FOR FREE ADDS!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU PEOPLE.
#80 NICOLE, HAVE YOU EVER STABBED ANYONE AND DO YOU HAVE EXPERIENCE IN HIDING DEAD BODIES FOR REAL????? WOW!!! YOU MIGHT BE JUST WHAT SHE IS LOOKING FOR. A HIRED ASSASIN, CAN TAKE AN ASS BEATING. GO FOR IT!!! ALL OF THESE THINGS WOULD LOOK REALLY GOOD ON AN APPLICATION!!!!!!!!!!
NOW WE CAN JUST SIT AROUND AND WAIT FOR SHANNON FUNK TO CONTACT THE TABLOIDS AND MAKE SOME MONEY OFF OF HER CRAZY BRITNEY STORIES.
when is this moron going to ealize that she is the problem not the ppl around her
Someone needs to help her! and make sure her kids are o.k. Everyone is just watching this and laughing and although I think she is a fucked up white trash no body SOMEONE needs to pick her up and help her fix this, for her kids. Where's her family? God, what are those kids going through?
#110-Claire
Those kids cant be going through any worse than M. Jacksons kids… if you saw that recent pic of Blanket you would agree… the whole thing is sad and i hope those kids are healthy, happy and safe.
Britney is a clown…seriously….I believe she is bipolar in denial…all her behavior points to this. She needs her meds…
What a piece of trash.
Shannon was bogarding the coke…..Can't have that y'all!
I wonder if Britney will come out saying that Shannon STOLE from her on the way out…? HAHAHAhahaha…. Karma's a BITCH, bitch.
Dear Britney,
You need me!!! I'll be your assistant!!! I will help you get you career back on track and we'll prove everyone wrong. You are the full entertainment package and we need to fix this mess!!! Here's my e-mail : studguy30@yahoo.com I mean it, you'll have the comeback of the century….
Joey
This is celebrity 101- when things go down the toilet fire your assistant
i would love to take the job.
i would love the job.
hello, britney if you can read this… i recently graduated college, and looking for a job is not fun. so if you need me — inquire within, kristie
You know people, saying "Britney is a train wreck," won't make anything different. No one cares about your opinions, so keep them to yourself. Thanks.
Anyone who won't be a 'yes' person to her whims, will not last long. Now she's in Vegas with the kids and her brother, what the heck for? She'll leave them in the room to party, is the brother going to be the babysitter? She is a train looking for a place to derail! Doesn't she realize that any of these ex-assistants can write a tell-all about her? OR at least share their stories for $$.
Britney is the worst kind of person. Whenever someone close to her does something she doesn't like, she gets rid of them and then slanders them in the press. It's that or she prays for them, insinuating that they are bad and need our help from God. And the fact that with Britney praying for them, then only will they be helped. She is a piece of shit. Please stop feeding her.
Brit is crazy enough without her!
you know what she needs… she needs me… young, but yet mature, organized and reliable. maybe she needs to stop looking in the la area… maybe someone from the boston area? she needs a friend but also someone who is strictly business at the same time.
Britney,
I just moved to LA and would love to apply as your new assistant. I'm in my 30's, grounded, hard working, and not caught up in the celebrity hype. As an outsider looking in I'll tell you like it really is. I'm serious but have no idea how to reach you. I'm sure I'll get a million emails by doing this but please email a contact number where you can be reached. Thanks. Dan (wehodan@hotmail.com).
Id apply to be here assistant
BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER.-
Unstable, intense and difficult relationships.
Poor self-image.
Self-destructive, impulsive behavior
Extreme mood reactions, including intense, inapropriate anger.
Feeling empty or alone.
Fear of abandonment
Short lived psychotic like distortions. especially under stress.
Self-mutilation
Suicidal threats or attempts.
Should I said more?… Please, oh please take her kids away from her, she may kill them! This is really serious.
HOT MESS…
Chiiiild needs some help!!
You know, when my friend was on cocaine, he did the same thing - pushed everyone away… that way he didn't have to share
…and the voices stopped
Britney is so not cool. She was the queen of the pop now she is only the queen of her butt because she has no assistant anymore!bang!:p
poor britney. it's too bad that EVERYONE is conspiring against her! she must have really bad luck - see how many people are ruining her life? ha. what a tard.
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
keep getting more dogs to make more shit for your babies to eat. clean up after your dogs, or better yet TRAIN THEM YOU LAZY WHORE!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
EVERYONE KNOWS SHITNEYS BABIES EAT DOG TURDS AND THATS WHY K-FART MADE HER GET RID OF THE CHIHUAHUAS!!!
How would I go about applying for a assistant for Britney? I think I would be perfect for her and her children. I have the very best reference in child care anyone would find. Please pass this on to her if all possible. Thank you
Ha. You know you're in trouble when your own family starts treating you like a has been.
Dat Bitch is as crazy as Chicken Lips…….
Apparently she's jetted off to Vegas and K-Fed is PISSED!!!!!
What are the job qualifications?
Do I have to light her crack pipe for her?
Hmm Britney is smart to drop n fired some… cause she is so cool for what she has done with OK!
i wanna be her ASSistant..it would be fun..we'd drink and do drugs together everyday!
Hey i'll be her assistant I am serious. How can I apply?
Perez. Please step in and sort this girl out once and for all….. its beyond pathetic. Lets dish the dirt, see the pics, read the story and MOVE ON TO SOMEONE ELSE!
I will no only light your Crack Pipe,I will buy your Crack .We can evan chase down your old assistant and her mother in your car Britney.Pick me !
She needs a gay! Where do I apply
In the words of former boy band five.. slam dunk da Funk!
I think Britney is pregnant again by the way her assistant is holding her.
know where i can send my resume?
SHES TOO DAMAGED TO GET WELL, I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START, ITS SAD
That's right Perez. Help the girl. SHE NEEDS IT. She needs to look at previous pictures of herself, and realize that her charming hotness has left the building. Oh man does she need to be fabulous again. You can do it! SAVE BRITNEY!
Where can I apply?
Britney you need someone like me as an assistant! I'm a young mom of 2 year old twins, I manage a house, I still get to go out, go to the gym and have a fantastic body, take care of my girls and work too. You can do it, too!!!! Get out of LA come to NY!!!
I would be able to do this job, hands down, i'm a hairdresser, full time dad to an 8 year old, love this women and only want her to be her former self only happy, so if it's possible on here, which I truly don't think it is, let me know please, can send resume, lots of love
I don't see why she needs to hire anyone? It's not like she's really doing anything business like?? I'm sorry, but millions of little girls around the world lip to music and they don't call it a business, so why does brit?
She just rich white trash who loves to blame others for her stupidity.
p.s. brit i don't believe a all i read, but the huge red letters that spell "retard" across your forhead is hard to miss.
Seriously…I would love to be her assistant. She needs someone to tell her the truth…I would be more than happy to tell her … starting with her hair…WTF. If she ever pulls a Puffy and puts an ad out on youtube.com for an assistant I may just apply. She needs someone to put their foot right up her butt.
instead of needing a new assistent she needs a new "crazy" pill, cuz apparently the one she own aint working. GET SOME HELP BRIT BRIT!!!!!!!!
Girl is so mentally ill, its beyond sad! Why doesn't someone committ her for evaluation? You can do that if someone makes threats to do themselves harm., Someone have the balls to step up and HELP her, she is devoid of talent and taste, but she is a sad human being who needs to be helped very soon or something very bad will happen to her. Maybe a stint (long one) in a MHMR facility would help ground her and she could grow out her hair. Her boys are in danger and she is the most pitiful thing imaginable. Remember the old movir Baby Jane? Similarities!
I think Britney's problems stem from her heterosexuality. I am a lesbian and I have never had babies from a deadbeat or driven all crazy on the road or fired a hot assistant I could have slept with. I did shave my head, but that was because Ani Difranco did, not because I was psycho.
If Britney became a lesbian all her problems would disappear. She should hire me because I could show her beautiful girl-on-girl love which would reform her life.
She has some big time issues.
This girl looked like some low end stripper that she picked up one night, and then hired her (while fucking her) …
and I bet ALL of you "applying" for that position , wouldn't last a month with this loon.. EVERYONE she has around her leaves very soon.. never the same body guards , nannies, and assistants… she doesnt really seem to have anyone at all that is around her because they WANT to be (other than getting paid or laid).
Finally, a good decision. It's a start…..
Hey Brianna, No kind of Orgasm can help the kind of crazy poor Brits gotten herself into. She needs meds not sex (no matter how good it may be) maybe when she's well she can explore her sexuality w you!
She fired her assistant…. because she wouldn't put out. So she's looking for a new rug muncher. Line up bitches & ho's, line up!
Britney is pregnant again!!!!!
uggh
soo expectd
i hate brittney
shes such a crackhead ovr wieght
Blaming her problems on other people once again.
FEEL VERY SAD FOR THE WHOLE SITUATION…this girl is a product of the industry that eats theml up…
Britney, Please, Please, Please for the life of YOU. .Consider our beloved Perez to be your new assistant. He will do you right.. he's got the might.. With him, you won't go wrong..you'll sing the song.. You are beautiful! Let your light shine ****Big Smiles***
Hiring Perezzzzzzz would be the best idea since divo from K-Fed
Shanon funk hahaha what kind of last name is that…seems perfect she's in a funk!!! She has the worst complection I've ever seen ewww
that assistant was obviously a wreck and along for the ride
forget Britney!! what about that poor dog. He gets carried around all day like a stuffed animal. Call the ASPCA!!
what are the odds that Britney gets busted for DUI tomorrow, for chasing after the assistant she just fired? Doesnt anyone see a pattern here?????
Can anyone say WT!
I would be a great personal assistant for Britney. I have a college degree and am a fan.
OK..i do care about her…i want to see you deal with…two little babies, a divorce …and the pressure of the media (remember the last episode with the paparazzi in malibu)…..SO I WANT TO HELP….i can start working as assistant for Miss Britney for a month for free…I can help her to get back the respect that she deserves because money is not what drives me.
Ciao
Gio
I kind of feel sad for her.
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not only would I like to apply to be her assistant, but also her friend. Because she obviously has sucky ass friends if they let her A)go out in dressed like a fool and B) can't keep her from doing stupid ass shit that makes her look crazy!!
Hey brit - need a new assistant - maybe give me a call/email - maybe I could help the crazinest of your life - I am a single mother and have been there and totally get it- need a friend - send an email.
britney need and Assistant?
wtf ????
can someone please tell me what the hell brit is doing with her life?
she needs to get off whatever shes on and just take care of her shit.
I never thought id say this…..but shes getting old
#156 BRIANNA, YOU ARE ONE SICKO DIKE!!!!!!!!!!! AND GGGGRRROOOOSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOL.. Id so be Britney's assistant..
I am an asst at a large software company in Redmond, WA and I think I could help Brit with her image….do you have a email address for her or her people? I think I could turn her image AROUND!
Poor thing…too much money too much time…
MY GOD! Just when you think she cant sink any lower, there she goes again! I mean, really, How mental is this girl? The news reports from here are saying that she's having another baby to her body gard, do you think she may be going for the slutty skany trashy of the year award? Maybe shes Bi-Polar? Or maybe she's just showing her true Trailer Park Trashieness….No wait, they have tones more "Klass" thatn she does………..
Shes justs a cheap skank with lots of dollars but little cents!
Cant Wait for the next Craxy Ass Installement!
BRIANNA, I DOUBT BEING A LESBIAN WOULD EVER SOLVE ALL OF SOMEONES PROBLEMS, LET ALONE MAKE THEM DISAPPEAR. HOW COULD IT WHEN YOU SOUND EFFED UP AND LIKE YOU ARE ONE PERVERTED LESBIAN?????????!!!!!!!!!!!
i vote perez hiltoN!
she's gone mad…insane..watever u name it… she really needs help
Brits thighs look like tubs of cottage cheese!
Forget that stupid white trash bitch, she will have future she deserves. But someone needs to save that poor dog. SAVE BRITNEYS DOG!!!
See, BritBrit needs to hire a slightly older, really bitchy gay guy as her assistant/confidant/handler/parent/therapist. Someone fabulous but professional, someone who will dress her so she doesn't look like a train wreck, someone who will know to drag her ass home and put her down for a nap when she starts acting like a homeless crackhead. My vote is that "Queer Eye" Carson person or some fagelah of that ilk.
shannon funk went to my high school! she was ummm on the special side LOl
brittany i could be your next asst, you look like you just need some one to just understand you. hang in there babe u will be back on top soon…………………………..
britney needs to realize she'll never be hott brit brit, now she's just trailer trash.
yo…. i used to be the BIGGEST britney fan, and i am officially over her…. its SO SAD the way she has chosen to live her life… her and lindsay lohan are the saddest stories… two talented indivuals with the world at their hands… and yet they continue to act like like ASSHOLES. how many ppl would give their left arms and right legs to do what they do… and they throw it all away acting irresponsible and trashy. its digusts me. i realize now that britney is a SELFISH list little girl who was given too much too soon… what a mess. what A MESS.
does she have clear heels on?
you know what clear heels means, right?
Ummmm… Does she ever spend time with her children anymore since she got this dog??? Every picture I have seen recently has been her out with her dog. Maybe she needs to start spending some quality time with her kids!!!!
britney, another idiot
God help America…
I agree Perez…tke those babies away from her..
Where can I apply? I'd be a great "asset" 2 Brit!
I don't really wish this to happen, but one day we are going to hear on the news that Britney is found dead in a Hotel room just like Anna Nicole. The sad thing is, she is melting down in public. And the sadder thing is there are alot more people like that all over the country who need help and can't get it or afford it. She can afford it, but isn't getting it.
Take the kids from her. I NEVER thought that KFED would be the stable one.
I hate the BLAME GAME …. it's you not me routine. GROW UP! Girl you have the inside of a dolls head for hair, reverse it!
Perez you should be her assistant!