Come on now, you're a big boy! Hold it in!

CSI star Gerald McCullouch was ordered by the court to attend a counseling session after the NYPD caught him in the act of public urination last week!

The actor was leaving NYC hotspot Amnesia with fellow actor Keith Collins when he felt the urge. Gerald explains:

"I'd had a little to drink. So, as I was coming down the West Side Highway, I asked my cab driver to pull over so I could relieve myself. Suddenly I was surrounded by three cop cars. I said, 'Officer, at least let me finish!'

"But I actually learned something from the hour-long quality-of-life counseling the judge sentenced me to. Education is better than a fine."

Well that's a decent attitude — but maybe hit the john before you leave the club!

[Image via Joseph Marzullo / WENN.]

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Have fun!

This morning, Chidi Uzomah, otherwise known as Ryan Seacrest's stalker, pled no contest to felony stalking and was sentenced to 3 months psychiatric evaluation at Chino State Prison in California.

Aw! But that means he'll miss the American Idol finale! Bummer!

After that, Chidi faces up to 2 years in prison for his crimes.

If it's any consolation, by that time, Idol might be off the air, so you don't have to worry about missing anything.

[Image via WENN.]

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He can't delay it any longer now that his grill is all taken care of!

Lil' Wayne is finally due to be sentenced and begin his one-year prison term today for attempted gun possession.

It was originally delayed so Wayne could undergo eight root canals and delayed AGAIN after a fire broke out in the Manhattan Criminal Court Building.

He's is expected to plead guilty today for attempted gun possession and turn himself in immediately after to begin his sentence. It's also expected that he could be released in October instead of serving his full sentence due to pleading a lesser deal.

A New York corrections offer explains how the rapper's time will be in jail:

"He'll be housed with inmates who are classified in his category, and he'll be able to be a regular inmate. He'll be able to watch television, go into the day room and congregate with people of his classification. He'll have no preferable treatment at all. He'll be treated like a regular inmate."

Good luck, Weezy! See ya in a few months!

[Image via Johnny Louis / WENN.]

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Nine German men were arrested on the red carpet at the Academy Awards yesterday after being caught with fake passes!

The passes had both MTV and CITI logos on them, but after they were approached by the police they were promptly arrested for trespassing and jailed.

You can't pull that kinda shiz at the Oscars — nein!

[Image via WENN.]

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Smooth!

Around 2 a.m. yesterday morning, R&B singer D'Angelo was arrested in the West Village of Manhattan by an undercover policewoman, after he mistook her for a prostitute and offered her $40 for oral sex.

Such a deal!

The officer promptly busted his ass and searched his vehicle, which had $12,000 stashed inside!

And he was such a cheapskate?! LOLz!

[Image via WENN.]

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What an effing hypocrite!

Watch the clip (above) for the deets on California State Senator Roy Ashburn's recent DUI arrest after exiting a gay club.

Loves that the man so opposed to gay marriage left the club with a guy!

Priceless.

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Don't recant! When you say you had plans to murder someone, you stick to your guns!

Earlier today, we reported that Sarah Trigger, Two and A Half Men star Jon Cryer's ex-wife, allegedly tried to put a hit out on her ex. The accusation came from Sarah's ex-boyfriend Eddie Sanchez, as he was the one she wanted to do the job.

Now, lawyers have evidence proving that Eddie is recanting his story! He allegedly left a voicemail for Sarah's mother Chrissy, saying, "I know she [Sarah] didn't do anything. So did I."

Also on the message, Eddie admits that he had been interviewed by the FBI, but he does not explain why he told others that Sarah was behind the hit on Jon.

Of course, this may all be a moot point as the tape could have been edited.

What to believe!!!!

[Image via WENN.]

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Maybe Charlie Sheen shouldn't be so fast to stay in rehab. His co-star may need his knife-wielding, cracked-out personality to save him from hitmen!

Sources are reporting that Two and A Half Men star Jon Cryer was allegedly almost offed by his wife, Sarah Trigger, who requested from an old boyfriend that he kill Jon!

WHAT?!?!

The information arose while custody papers were being drawn up between Jon and his ex-wife. During the proceedings, Sarah told her lawyer that her ex-boyfriend had allegedly confessed he had plans to kill Jon and her other estranged husband, David Dickey. Her lawyer looked into the allegation further and upon questioning, the ex-boyfriend, Eddie Sanchez, denied saying any such thing, claiming that Sarah had "contacted him on numerous occasions, stating that she wanted to see the pair [Cryer and Dickey] dead, and even asking Mr. Sanchez if he would kill the pair, or if he would not, inquiring whether she could speak with Mr. Sanchez's father about this issue."

According to documentation, Charlie Sheen might have had Jon's back on this, requesting that the show stop taping in front of a live studio audience for Jon's safety. Since this information has been made public, the FBI had launched an investigation.

Jeez! Things are not so duckie for you, Jon! We hope you upped your security! This bitch sounds CRAZY!

[Image via WENN.]

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Adrian Pasdar of Heroes fame was arrested for suspicion of driving under the influence back in January after being pulled over while speeding in El Lay and failing a field sobriety test.

And he's actually pleading NOT guilty to the misdemeanor!

The actor, married to Dixie Chick Natalie Maines, faces up to six months in the slammer and $1000 fine if convicted.

Best of luck, buddy — but we think you might be screwed!

[Image via Nikki Nelson / WENN.]

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