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Completely Gratuitous News Archive

25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!

| Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewColin FarrellPhotos!Chris EvansCompletely GratuitousJamie Dornan

Irish men are hot as fuck!

Irish men are one of God's greatest gifts to us all!

St. Patrick's Day always makes us get a little bit, well, excited for a fine Irish lad to cuddle with in a bed of clovers, and luckily we have a gallery of hotties to ogle right here.

Sure, we're just fantasizing and not actually getting anywhere near them, but just let us have this, dammit! Whether they grew up in Ireland or maybe just trace their family line back to Ireland, we gladly welcome them all into our arms!

Click through and enjoy some of the most gorgeous Irish men in the gallery (below)!

CLICK HERE to view "25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!"

CLICK HERE to view "25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!"

CLICK HERE to view "25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!"

CLICK HERE to view "25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!"

CLICK HERE to view "25 Irish Hotties Who You'd Want To Get Lucky With On St. Patrick's Day!"

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These Hot Hollywood Hunks LOVE To Show Off Their BULGE!

| Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewZac EfronRyan ReynoldsDrakeJon HammCompletely Gratuitous

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Zefron NEVER disappoints!

Zac Efron most definitely made our list of celebrity males who love showing off their bulges — just look at the Baywatch star in tight ass denim (above)!

YUUUM!

But he's not the only dude who displays his dick on the reg! We're looking at you Jon Hamm, Drake, and Ryan Reynolds!

CLICK HERE to view "Hollywood Hunks Who LOVE To Keep Their Bulges Snug In Tight Pants!"

CLICK HERE to view "Hollywood Hunks Who LOVE To Keep Their Bulges Snug In Tight Pants!"

CLICK HERE to view "Hollywood Hunks Who LOVE To Keep Their Bulges Snug In Tight Pants!"

CLICK HERE to view "Hollywood Hunks Who LOVE To Keep Their Bulges Snug In Tight Pants!"

CLICK HERE to view "Hollywood Hunks Who LOVE To Keep Their Bulges Snug In Tight Pants!"

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12 Days Of Perezmas: 1 Big Orlando Bloom Penis!!!

| Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewOrlando BloomKaty PerryCompletely GratuitousMiranda KerrPeen

One big, glorious Orlando Bloom penis!

On the first day of Christmas, pop culture gave to us…

…one big, glorious Orlando Bloom penis!

It was a day like any other, and then, completely out of nowhere, like an unexpected gift falling into your lap, there was peen.

And not just any peen, but Orlando Bloom peen. A peen that has been happily welcomed inside Miranda Kerr and Katy Perry; a peen that has been a pirate and a wood elf; a peen that perfectly preened on a paddle board one hot summer day in Sardinia.

We don't know why Orly chose to make his schlong so pubic, uh, we mean public, but we're not mad or anything.

If his dong is more comfortable in its birthday suit, then by all means, let that wiener go wild!

See it in all its uncensored, uncut beauty (below)!

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Can You Guess Which Celeb This Beautiful, Shirtless Body Belongs To??

| Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewGuess The CelebrityCompletely GratuitousAbsBodySnapchat

Nick Jonas

This is just what your Friday needed.

While this singer isn't a stranger to giving us shirtless selfies on social media, we were more than excited when the New Jersey babe graced our timelines with this close up of all his chiseled bod. Those arms!!!

Let's just say adding this 24-year-old on Snapchat was one of our better decisions we've ever made.

And if you can't get enough of photos like these, you can always scoot over to his brother's page for similar content! Now this is something we can get behind!

Related: James Franco Strips For Hillary Clinton!

Have you figured out whose head belongs to this beautiful body?

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More Pictures From Harry Styles' Another Man Photo Shoot For You To Drool Over

Harry Styles

Harry Styles' Another Man feature is the gift that keeps giving!

First we showed you the three very different covers, then we dished the juicy One Direction gossip from the interview conducted by Paul McCartney and Chelsea Handler… and now, we've got even more photos of the 22-year-old for you to drool over!

You can't thank us later!

Related: Niall Horan Drops A Surprise Solo Single!

In the retro photo shoot, the breakout actor rocks a variety of looks ranging from a red military jacket with a sixties haircut to a patterned polo neck jumper as he lays in a field of flowers.

Also, why the tears (above), Harry??? Are you as sad as we are that OD is probably never, ever getting back together?!

Take a look for yourself at the newest photos from the shoot in the gallery (above)!

Which look is UR fave?? SOUND OFF in the comments!

[Image via Another Man.]

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When The F*ck Did Joe Jonas Get So Hot?!?!?

| Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewCompletely GratuitousJoe JonasFitnessGym TimeShirtlessAbsGun ShowSkinBody

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Aaaaaaaaaaaand, cue the drool.

Joe Jonas is suddenly super freakin' hot. Now, Perezcious readers, most of you probably already knew this about the Jonas Brothers middle child, but we only recently discovered his more muscly physique.

Related: Joe Loves Playing The Field!

Thanks to a seXXXy shirtless snap the DNCE frontman posted on Instagram Wednesday, we have now come to learn that the singer is totally ripped!

Ch-ch-check it out (below)!

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MORE Movie Stars You Never Knew Did Nude Scenes!

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These movie stars aren't known for their nude work — but that didn't stop them from baring all when it was required!

Believe it or not, even America's sweethearts Molly Ringwald and Reese Witherspoon have gone topless — and big studio superheroes like Mark Ruffalo, Michael Fassbender, and Scarlett Johansson have all gone full frontal on film!

We gathered the NSFW proof that these well-known actors wore their birthday suits to work!

CLICK HERE to view "Movie Stars You Never Knew Got Naked On Film!"

CLICK HERE to view "Movie Stars You Never Knew Got Naked On Film!"

CLICK HERE to view "Movie Stars You Never Knew Got Naked On Film!"

CLICK HERE to view "Movie Stars You Never Knew Got Naked On Film!"

CLICK HERE to view "Movie Stars You Never Knew Got Naked On Film!"

[Image via Paramount Pictures/Pathé/A24.]

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