The truth will set you free, Lance Armstrong!
On Wednesday, Lance pled guilty to charges stemming from a December incident in Aspen — essentially, the cyclist crashed into two parked cars, a mistake he tried to pawn off on his girlfriend.
[ Related: Lance Has Been Fined For Using Performance Enhancing Drugs! ]
Pretty heinous, right?
It's time to pay up, Lance Armstrong!
In a recent ruling, Lance was ordered to pay 10 MILLION DOLLARS (the largest sanction against an individual in American judicial history) to SCA Promotions, a Dallas sports company that paid him hefty bonuses for each Tour De France win.
[ Related: Lance Made His Girlfriend Take The Blame For A Car Accident He Caused?! ]
Essentially, when Armstrong lied under oath in 2005 about taking performance enhancing drugs, the sports company took his word and never went after the shamed sports legend… until NOW.
The arbitration panel in Texas that made the decision for Lance to pay back the money said:
Rosie O'Donnell had some pretty cutting remarks for Brian Williams over the weekend.
The future former host of The View really knows how to kick a guy when he's down!
[ Related: Brian Williams Steps Down From NBC Nightly News Temporarily! ]
Preliminary ratings show that Williams' lying scandal has cost NBC Nightly News; viewership in the 25-54 age range dropped an alarming 36 percent Friday night!
But that didn't stop Rosie from keeping the newsman on blast. Actually, she burned herself pretty well while she was at it!
While presenting an award at the Athena Film Festival in New York on Saturday, Rosie reportedly pointed at a woman in the audience and joked:
Lance Armstrong is getting himself into some hot trouble, but hey, what do you expect from a guy who admits he'd totally cheat again to win a race?
Apparently back in December, the 29th to be exact, Lance and his girlfriend Anna Hansen were involved in a car accident after leaving a party at the St. Regis Aspen Resort in Aspen, Colorado.
After his vehicle was identified in the accident, Anna reportedly told the police officers she was driving and took the fall for the crash.
According to the police report, Anna said she lost control of the car and hit two parked vehicles. She then returned to the scene of the crime and told the victims she would pay for all of the damages.
Well, we're not sure if Lance Armstrong has quite learned his lesson.
In his first sit down interview since he talked with Oprah in 2013 about his doping scandal, Lance totally admitted that he'd probably cheat again if he were magically transported back to 1995, and given the chance to do it all over.
The cyclist had previously won seven Tour de France titles, only to have them all stripped from him after his doping offenses became public.
He is also banned from the world of professional cycling.
[ Related: Lance Draws Card About His Missing Ball Playing Cards Against Humanity ]
Here's what the once proud cyclist had to say on whether or not he'd cheat again to BBC Sport:
Looks like Bradley Cooper has decided to help tell the story of The Legend of Doper Lance!
Okay, so that might not be the title of the upcoming Lance Armstrong movie, but Bradley is in talks to become a producer on Red Blooded American (actual title), and potentially to star in one of the two leading roles of Lance and his whistle-blowing teammate, Tyler Hamilton.
Either way, Bradley would put pedal to the metal in either of these parts, and wouldn't need drugs to enhance his performance either!
We already know how natural Bradley is on a motorcycle, a bicycle should be an easy adjustment!
[Image via WENN.]
Talk about a match made in HOLY CRAP!
In the most shocking, jaw-dropping, pinch-us-because-we-must-be-dreaming-about-Zefron news we can remember, Oprah Winfrey has reached down from her magnificent royal tower and extended her glorious hand to the lost and forlorn Lindsay Lohan!!!
In what will be her first interview after finishing up her court-ordered rehab stint, Lindz has agreed to do an exclusive sit-down with The Big O!
Whoa!!! This makes the Lance Armstrong interview look like small (and artificially-enchanced) potatoes!!!
Even CRAZIER, LiLo will be given her own eight-episode documentary series on Oprah's OWN network!!!!
The network's spokesperson confirmed: